Yeah it was pretty crazy. That in itself cemented my reasonings for wanting to leave.
Younglove1999
JoinedPosts by Younglove1999
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17
Even though you're a JW, I don't know you so back off!
by Younglove1999 indid you ever feel that way when you were in "the truth"?
i hated that people tried to overstep the normal boundaries humans have with strangers and get all "brotherly and encouraging".
when we changed congregations, i found it so annoying when people we barely knew tried to act as if we were best friends.
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26
Its my JWD Birthday!
by Sassy ini went into my profile and there it was.
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4 yrs since i joined!!.
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Younglove1999
Happy JWD birthday!!
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17
Even though you're a JW, I don't know you so back off!
by Younglove1999 indid you ever feel that way when you were in "the truth"?
i hated that people tried to overstep the normal boundaries humans have with strangers and get all "brotherly and encouraging".
when we changed congregations, i found it so annoying when people we barely knew tried to act as if we were best friends.
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Younglove1999
I'd like to think good thoughts about this elder guy, but he has been nothing but a nuisance since the day we walked into those kingdom hall doors. Every time we missed a meeting, he'd call. If we missed field service, he'd call us after the meeting for field service to say they'd do a call and come pick us up if we were just running late but wanted to join the group. If we didn't comment, he'd come over to "see how things were going". My grandfather passed away when I was in the middle of being very ill during my pregnancy and we missed the two day assembly due to everything and the Saturday night of the first day of the assembly Brother "best friend" calls us to say he didn't see us there (you were searching us out among 2,000 people?!) and I told him I was still very ill and the stress of my grandfather's recent passing and family issues was taking it's toll so I couldn't push it and I needed to relax. This phone call came around 8:30 at night and 15 minutes later, who was at our door offering to chat? Yep!
Fast foward to when we started fading. Obviously from the above, it was difficult to do the miss a few and show up, so we stopped cold turkey. After ONE week, Brother Best Friend called us 6 or 7 times in ONE day and proceeded to do that for the entire week. Phone calls to our home, cell phones, and even at work. Not once did he ever apologize for disturbing us with the numerous phone calls. Showed up to our house unannounced several times- the whole deal. When we finally told him to please respect our privacy and to not show up at our house without checking with us. He backs off for like 2 weeks- at this point I had given birth. Then the unannouced visits and phone calls ensued once again. One time I answered the door in my PJ's with my baby in the sling and he started talking and I interrupted saying that we specifically asked that nobody visit with out calling us first. Again, not once did he apologize. He just went into this whole "you guys are our closest friends, we care" etc. Yeah right- *rolls eyes*
It's his last ditch effort to makes us "feel bad" for being upset with them.
Yeah, 2 months worth of interrupted napping can make a person kind of bitter- LOL
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43
Week long Elders school announced
by JWFreak inat the agm it was announced that all elders in the us will attend a weeks 5 days kingdom ministry school next year.
there will be a different class held at patterson each week until all us elders have attended.
not sure about other countries.
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Younglove1999
Man that is too much-
I bet all the elders will have to pay out of their own pockets for this trip and yet somehow the WBTS will convince them during the week that they should contribute towards "use of the facilities".
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17
Even though you're a JW, I don't know you so back off!
by Younglove1999 indid you ever feel that way when you were in "the truth"?
i hated that people tried to overstep the normal boundaries humans have with strangers and get all "brotherly and encouraging".
when we changed congregations, i found it so annoying when people we barely knew tried to act as if we were best friends.
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Younglove1999
did you ever feel that way when you were in "the truth"?
I hated that people tried to overstep the normal boundaries humans have with strangers and get all "brotherly and encouraging".
When we changed congregations, I found it so annoying when people we barely knew tried to act as if we were best friends.
I could never buy into the whole "you're a JW, I trust you. Instant true friendship" thing. To me, you were a stranger, JW or not, until I got to know you and trust you. Until then, step away and give me some space.
The other day my husband got a call from an Elder in our old congregation (the one we "faded" from). Now we were only in that hall for like 9 months. He's trying to talk to my husband and saying things like "I view you as one of my closest friends," blah blah blah. Seriously? 9 months in the hall, 2 months of being in this guy's book study, one dinner out, working out in service with him like 3 times equals a unbreakable bond of friendship?
Maybe I just never had brotherly love
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37
Were The Elderly & Infirm Truly Given Assistance In Your Hall?
by minimus inour congregation had a number of elderly ones who regularly complained that no one ever helped them.
since the elders didn't really want to be responsible for them, they decreed that the family should help out first.
fair enough.
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Younglove1999
NO-
We were spread thin trying to help my emotionally deranged mother in law. We were 20 years old and left to deal with her no matter how much we pleaded that we needed help with her. We did so much for her and it was never enough. I don't even want to get into it, but I remember one time she was out with two "sisters" and started feeling ill. It was about an hour away from our house and we were both home with the flu. Oh, I should preface this by saying my mother has been clinically diagnosed with Hypochonrism. So anyways, she had an "ill episode" where the sisters ended up bringing her to the nearby hospital. They then called us and said, "we're leaving, your mom is in the ER and needs someone to bring her home and we can't stay"- Since she's a hypochondriac, we at this point obviously stopped freaking out over EVERY single event that happened and we were like "well, we're sick with the flu, you guys are an hour and a half away from us, is there anyway you can stick around? We're ill, and don't have any more sick time so we have to work tomorrow".. NOPE, it was OUR RESPONSIBLITY- They didn't want to stick around either even to help US out even if they thought my mother in law was a mess.
God I have SO many of THOSE stories-
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15
Show The Love....
by saywhat29 inokay i think everybody here understands anger, sadness, and fear, but you know.... this is going to be the strangest thread ever, might be even out of place but.... what are some of the things you miss and/or love about your family and friends, yes the jws ones.
because only people who you love like hell can put a deep cut into your chest like that.
and no i don't think this is a jw apologist kind of thread, at least i don't think so because acknowledging the horrible stuff people do to you (us) doesn't mean that we have to forget about all the positive things and good qualities of a person.. like my mom for instance.
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Younglove1999
Well, I'm not sure this is 'tearing-up" worthy, but I truly appreciated the generosity of my last congregation when we were pregnant with our little girl. We had only been in the hall for less than a year and they gave us a really nice baby shower. One sister gave me this bin full of Laura Ashley dresses from ages 18 months to 5 years old. Each dress was dry cleaned and wrapped in tissue and all stored in this bin. So nice of her. My husband and I were touched by everyone's generosity.
In fact, my old congregation also threw us a shower as well as my parents congregation. They went above and beyond to help make sure we had everything we needed for our first child.
it's something I'll never forget-
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11
One of those days
by Younglove1999 inyou know, when the haunting trauma of being out of the organization rears it's ugly head- .
my husband and i have been out for almost 9 months now and i still struggle with so many emotions.
some days/weeks i'm fine and other times i just have so much bottled up, i feel like exploding.
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Younglove1999
just an update on my day yesterday-
after I posted this, I got an email from my mom telling me about my daughter and what they did that day and within the email was an "I wish you guys went to meetings again so Gianna (my daughter) could hear about Jehovah". *sigh* I let it roll off my sleeve and then I got home. My mom gave me the baby update and left. I got the mail and I had a card from one of my mom's friends in Maine. The best "canned encouraing" card one could get. All about spiritual responsibility, perfect paradise, ensuring success for our family by maintaining our spirituality, you know, all that BS. Grr.. not making my day better. I almost want to send a card back merely saying "umm, the paradise is not coming- it's a farce..thanks for thinking of us. Love, XXX" oh well. Then I go into the dining room and sitting perfectly on the table is a brand new, fresh Watchtower that my mom apparently left. That was the last straw. I texted my mother (she's deaf, so this is usually how we go back and forth if we don't talk on the video phone) and said that she left HER WT here and to please take it with her tomorrow because we don't want it. I then said to her "i wish I could explain to you how I feel, but I just can't" I know, a little hasty but I had just had it up to here. She doesn't reply and later on I feel bad for being so mad- what if she did jsut forget it and wasn't intending on leaving it out for us? So I just quickly texted her telling me that I was jumping the gun and I would put her WT with her other things and hope she's having a good evening. She replied saying she sent me a quick email, but not to worry about upsetting her.
I check my email this morning and it says "sorry you're upset. I hope you're just inactive and nothing more that way it'll be ok for me to associate with you"
I would prefer to just let this "religious bantering" between myself and my mother just die out right now. So I'm not going to say anything more.
But talk about making a bad day worse. uggghh!!! -
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Have you ever forgotten your baby was in the car?
by changeling inwhat's up with this wave of people forgetting their babies are in the car?
i'm a certifiable dingbat but i never forgot my kids were in the car.
if i ever did, i can't see it happening for more than a few minutes and then running back to the car to get them.
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Younglove1999
It's so sad when I hear those stories.
My mother comes to our home to baby sit so i never have to bring her anywhere in the morning, but every day when I park my car at work, I check the car seat and remind myself that my daughter is with my mom. I intentionally put all my bags in the back seat so that I have to go there to get my stuff before going into the office.
If I leave work first before my husband does, I'll call him to see how the morning went and if our daughter was ok with grandma before he left.
Yeah, I'm a little paranoid, but I've had that autopilot feeling and I hate it, so I'm always triple checking. I work full time and I just feel better doing so.
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11
One of those days
by Younglove1999 inyou know, when the haunting trauma of being out of the organization rears it's ugly head- .
my husband and i have been out for almost 9 months now and i still struggle with so many emotions.
some days/weeks i'm fine and other times i just have so much bottled up, i feel like exploding.
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Younglove1999
thanks everyone.
I wouldn't say these feelings are holding me back- I think it's healthy for me to go through this, but there is a time, place and even a limit to how I allow these emotions to creep in. So I think it's just trying to figure out a healthy way to deal.
When I come home from work, I don't even have time to think about all this- I just enjoy my little girl, enjoy the fact that I don't have to rush around getting ready for the meeting and having to study on non-meeting nights, enjoy my husband and just live.
I think being in the organization all my life, the idea of being balanced emotionally, physically, etc. is very distorted and I'm just on this road trying to figure out how to truly go about truly being balanced. Some days it sucks but eventually I think I'll get to where I need to be. I'm thankful to have a husband to go through it with and the fact that my daughter just radiates with the idea of hope and love. I'll get there.