Stepford Wife - You certainly have your hands full- and that's putting it mildly. I agree with many here who say NOT to meet with the elders. They are trained by the WT Society to coerce you into a corner and box you in until they get you to spill the beans with information they can nail you with so as to judge you worthy of a judicial committee. It's true that they will TRY to find something to use against you in order to justify bringing you up for a JC meeting. So don't meet with them, just tell them you are doing fine on your own and that if you ever need their help- you will let them know in the future.
Also- Seriously think about your husband crying if you took a life saving blood transfusion . I mean WTF ? That tells you all you need to know about where the WT organization is in HIS priorities in life and the fact that he's more concerned about losing his elders position than his wife losing her life ! Did I say the WT Society is a high control , mind control organization - if I didn't I just did. This organization steals away ANY authentic, humane, empathetic personality that people have and replaces it with a WT Society first personality that loses all manners , civility , or ethical treatment of others. Your husband is seriously controlled.
If you intend to make your marriage work in spite of your differences I would suggest not talking to the elders and even staying low on your husbands radar concerning talking to him about your doubts. If you don't World war 3 may begin and your marriage will be on a short leash. Unless of course you WANT to blow the whole thing up- then speak your mind and talk away . Your future is in your hands to some extent. We are here as a support to you my friend, it's not easy I know- been there done that. Been out of the Witnesses going on 13 years now- happiest times of my life . Hang in there, take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper