The programming runs deep, much deeper that we imagine.
After I found this website and did online research I knew I would never go back. Yet every time I broke a new rule, I'd feel immensely guilty, the kind of guilt that wakes you up at night. The first time I got drunk, the first time I smoked marijuana, the first time I had sex, each of those instances was followed by feelings of incredible guilt even though I no longer believed in the Witnesses. It was programming pure and simple and I knew it, but it didn't make the feelings any less real.
Eight years after I left the Witnesses I found myself on a business trip in a foreign country. We went to dinner and my boss wanted to order blood sausage. Even though it'd been eight years since I left the Witnesses an unsettling sense of panic came over me. After all that time the indoctrination was still there.
As others have mentioned, it gets better with time, but there's a very real re-wiring of the brain process that takes place at a physiological level that's simply part of unplugging from the Watchtower.
Best of luck to you.