serotonin_wraith,
Is it really possible for parents to in some degree not indoctrinate their children? Don't atheist parents influence their children to be atheists? Don't Catholic parents do the same? It is natural for parents to train their children as they believe. My husband and I believe that Jesus taught the worship of Jehovah not himself. We believe Jesus taught us to love our neighbor not to kill him in wars. Because we believe these teachings are good we try to instill them in our children. "Ophelia" is a young adult she will one day be on her own and free to make her own choices just as her older brother is but for now we are charged with the responsibility to do what we feel is best for our minor children.
I can't speak for all atheists, but I can speak for myself. As an atheist, I would never make my child think as I do. I would give them the free reign of all choices. Atheism, Hindu, Christian, Buddhist, Muslim, Scientology, Mormon, Thor belief, Ra belief, etc etc etc. I would widen the selection considerably to encompass a wide range of beliefs. By teaching a child only one belief, we limit their choices.
I too believe treating people with kindness is the best way to act- however, I wouldn't need to teach them Jesus was born of a virgin to accomplish this. The 'golden rule' is a good one on its own without having to teach everything else the 'good book' has to offer as truth. One day she will be able to choose for herself, but there is no denying that teaching a young child your beliefs will influence their decision in a huge way. When she is old enough, she may feel she has to follow Jesus (as apparently has happened with you after your parents taught you their beliefs) or she may find it hard to think for herself because she'll be afraid of the eternal punishment your religion teaches. People don't suddenly start to form their own opinions at 18 or 21- they can be formed in childhood, and become extremely hard to shake off. Adulthood can bring about changes, but it all depends on how weak or strong the mind is.