Socially interacting with everyone on the "outside".While in the collective we were taught that it's not a deprevation, but rather a joy to be odd and seperate from the "world". Growing up I hated the idea of being different .It was as if the society shaped this cult to be like the islamic faith in regards of once you're in there's no turning back, but you can leave but instead of killing you physically if you turned "apostate", they kill you socially and emotionally through your family and friends that are in the collective that have their eyes wide shut. I was deprived of MANY things and great opportunities to grown in this life. Yes, I turned them down! All because of some sick pleasure I got of pleasing their god through suffering mentally, physically in everyway.
Once I realised this was wrong, I realised I will be alone in my life as far as the cult goes...and I had to accept this.
Of course I wished that I could turn back the hands of time, we all do. But I can't. I did'nt have a choice in being born into this stupid belief with crazed parents, that thought that they were right in sheltering me from this world, from friends that really wanted me as a friend. They said it was because that Satan wants to keep us from serving jehovah.
Right now how I feel... in my opinion; the only thing being a witness EVER taught me to be good at is being passive aggressive, manic depressive, and a sado-masochist.
true.
jojochan.