Posts by bythesea

10

Is there such a thing as dispensation for blood use?

by bythesea in

i was talking with "worldly" friends the other day and they mentioned a jw friend they knew who recently had some serious surgery and received a special dispensation so that she could have blood for this surgery.

that's what they claim she told my friends....the husband is an elder, and it was suggested that through his contacts that he was able to get this for her.

i expressed disbelief and have asked my friends to see if they can get more info about her "dispensation" and whether she actually recv'd whole blood or fractions during surgery.

bythesea

I was talking with "worldly" friends the other day and they mentioned a JW friend they knew who recently had some serious surgery and received a special dispensation so that she could have blood for this surgery. That's what they claim she told my friends....the husband is an elder, and it was suggested that through his contacts that he was able to get this for her. I expressed disbelief and have asked my friends to see if they can get more info about her "dispensation" and whether she actually recv'd whole blood or fractions during surgery. They've said she never mentioned fractions, but referred to BLOOD. I've also asked them to find out who this dispensation actually came from.

Have any of you ever heard of a dispensation for blood use? I've been associated with JWs for over 25 yrs and have never heard of such a thing, and while I miss lots of meetings now, in my fade, I'm sure my devout husband would inform me of such a change if there was one. What's your take on this story?

19

Did You Feel Living Under Strict Rules Kept You In The Religion?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i know of many people who actually prefer to be told what to do or what not to do because it's easier for them to co-exist.

they just act on autopilot and seem for the most part happy.. some feel that government isn't really an interference; the more laws the better!.

some "in the truth" also feel that "whatever mother says is good enough for me".

bythesea

I absolutely agree with you, Minimus. My hubby is one of those who prefers having strict guidelines and I've talked with others who feel like they can't trust their own judgment or thinking on things but should rely on the FDS or GB to keep them in line.

In fact, my hubby told me couple of yrs ago that if he wasn't a JW I probably wouldn't like the person he'd become....which is a crock of crap. We were adults and in our middle yrs of life when we became JWs and I LIKED him better when we weren't in the religion! But, he thinks he'd return to a life of "debauchery" if he wasn't a JW. I find that sad because I know it's just an excuse to not investigate the religion and find he's been wrong all these years.

30

Has Anyone On This Board Ever Had a Near Death Experience?

by Rapunzel in

i was wondering if anyone had ever experienced a n.d.e.

has anyone ever felt that they were visited by a family member/loved one who had passed on?.

i have read that some scientists theorize that n.d.e.

bythesea

I work with hospice and there are many stories of those who are dying who pass back and forth from the living realm to the "other world" before finally leaving their body behind. I have not witnessed this personally but it isn't uncommon to hear from families and hospices workers that this phenomenon takes place. When "on the other side" the ill person frequently talks about/with dead loved ones and seems in conversation with them. It is evidently a powerful thing to be eye witness to as they are at peace and enjoying themselves.

Here's a true story related by one of the hospice educators: a young woman with terminal cancer had gone to make a last visit to family some distance from her home. Her fiance was to join her the following week. While at her families home she took a turn for the worse and it was obvious she didn't have much time left. Her fiance was contacted and told to come NOW....on the way there he was killed in a car accident. It was decided that she should not be told of his death and nothing was said or talked about in her presence so as not to distress her. But.....within a few days she began referring to her brother by her fiances name.....he kept correcting her until finally she opened her eyes and told him "no, John is with me now....he's going to help me....you don't have to worry about me." She died soon after. Makes one wonder....and this is just one of many such stories of those who cross back and forth....before actual death.

Another book that tells of near death experiences is "Life after Life" by Dr. Moody.....he also worked in a childrens hospital and shares his experiences with dying children....who appear to be more open to these portals.

78

MY PROJECT IS (FINALLY) FINISHED!

by Mary in

for those of you who are interested, the project i've been working on for the last few months is finally finished.

i originally did a thread about it back in april: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/10/156497/1.ashx.

it seems that alot of us still have family members in the religion and have not infrequent arguments with them about some of the beliefs and practices.

bythesea

Mary.......thanks for your hard work! I'm sending you a pm for a hard copy when they're ready to send out!

bythesea

6

need help please with letter to my dad

by atpeace in

i haven't been posting lately - work is busy and all that.

so i get a letter from my dad yesterday.

he and family just recently visited.

bythesea

Hi Atpeace....its really hard with family, to try and explain anything we're feeling without it being threatening to them. I said way too much at the beginning and had to back off and lighten up so as not to alienate family who were seeing me go through my disillusionment with the WTS and all that goes along with it. In reply to my saying I had some questions and was doing my own research on things I was told to just go to the elders, was cautioned about not doing research outside the WT literature and so on.

I agree with Journey On, come up with a non-threatening statement you can give anyone, something neutral that lets them know you haven't lost your mind but won't tolerate being interrogated either. I don't know your age or circumstances, but I've tried to keep in mind that family usually means well, they love us and what they worry about is losing us eternally.... nonetheless, you DO have a right, even scripturally, to "make sure of all things" and if your own findings don't match with what you've known as a JW then it will be your decision as to what to do with that information. This has worked well for me: "I'm having a difficult time with some things right now and am kind of taking a break until I figure out how I feel about things." I do NOT allow anyone to try and drag further information out of me... If it helps, you can add that you feel you still have a relationship with God and that you are not leaving Jehovah....since they don't separate God from the Org then its to your benefit right now! It takes some of their worry away. That may be "theocratic warfare" but it softens the blow for them to have you falling away.

Its all hard, I know, and I still struggle with it myself....best to you....let us know how it goes.

32

how many insiders?

by agent zero in

hi everyone, i'm new here, been viewing the board for a while, decided to join yesterday.. so i'm about 95% convinced now the wts is bogus, but i'm still in coz as yall know leaving is the hardest part.

i plan on doing a fade to avoid the complete disconnection, but first want to gradually help my gf to see things too.

in the meantime, i'm just wondering how many of you are still "active" jdubs?

bythesea

Welcome......I still go to occassional meetings but haven't been in the ministry for over 2 yrs now. I'm trying to fade....the spouse and adult children are still very much in, so it makes it difficult to think about a total disconnect right now....I'd like to preserve my family relationships if possible. Good luck however you decide to handle things....lots of people's experiences on this forum, much to be learned.... I wish there WAS a code for being to identify other faders....a song to hum, secret handshake or something! I look around also and wonder who else is only in for family's sake.....and knows its all a crock of crap!

bythesea

36

So it happened...I met with my Mom and Dad...

by Confession in

brief historical recounting.... 3rd generation of 4 generation jw family.

elder for three years.

realized "the truth" wasn't in september of 2004. tried to fade by moving from michigan to southern california in june of 2005 with my (then) 17 year old daughter (who eventually left the organization herself.

bythesea

I'd read your letter when you posted it, Confession, and thought it was a great effort.....don't feel bad that you didn't give it to them....... you didn't for all the right reasons. It appears that you are building a new relationship with them and will have them in your future, and that is what you want. I'm happy for all of you!! Your letter will be of help to many who read it here and may be able to use it with their own family or friends at some point, so it was not a wasted effort! Plus, didn't it feel good to just get your own thoughts down for carification when you did write it??

I hope this visit with your parents will be one of many and help to rebuild your relationships....a great first step was taken! Wonderful news!

bythesea

46

Letter to My Mother--FINAL!--After 2yrs3mos--Incomprehensibly Long...

by Confession in

[2 john 9 11, nwt].

[john 14:6, nwt] .

bythesea

EXCELLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well worth the time it took to read. Much thought provoking stuff for your mom to consider, and very lovingly presented.....a lot of thought obviously went into this and I'm very grateful for your posting it for us to read also. This is a keeper & I would like to use some of it, perhaps, when I'm ready to confront my own family....is that ok, Jon?

I really hope you get a good response from your mom....please keep us posted!

bythesea

72

I'm new too!

by Annointeds Daughter in

jw
friends

i'm new to the forum.

i've been lurking for some time, since i was "disconnected" by my husband, "tooktheredpill".

i'm a 3rd generation witness, and still inside of the borg, because all my family is inside.

bythesea

WELCOME, we're so happy for you both!!! It's a monumental achievment when both manage to leave the WTS.... I completely understand your fear and anger over what you have learned about your religion. I have generations of family still in, including my mate and adult children and their babies who will be raised in the faith. It's heartbreaking, believe me. So, in order to keep relationships with those I love I keep one foot in....but they no longer own me in any respect!

For those of us who still have a believing mate I hope you will share your experience with us....we are always eager to hear if maybe there will be something we can use on our own mates/family to help open their eyes to the REAL truth.

I'm so happy for you, AD....and you too, TTRP! I don't post often but had to welcome you and will look forward to your future posts!

Bythesea

44

How Many Here Have Any Ties To JW Relatives or Friends?

by minimus in

jw
friends

are you completely jw free?

bythesea

I'm surrounded....husband is still in....adult children and their mates are all in, parents, grandparent, aunts, uncles, cousins, all siblings but 2 are believers. It makes it difficult to have a normal conversation, having to be on guard all the time.