Brief historical recounting...
3rd generation of 4 generation JW family. Elder for three years. Realized "The Truth" wasn't in September of 2004. Tried to fade by moving from Michigan to southern California in June of 2005 with my (then) 17 year old daughter (who eventually left the organization herself.) Told Mom I no longer believed in the WTS in March of 2006. I've been shunned since then, except for a couple of tense phone calls to Mom. A couple of months ago I realized my company would be sending me to within an hour's drive of them, so I called and suggested we meet. After two weeks they e-mailed me, telling me they would.
I had no idea what to expect, but wanted to be prepared, so I finally completed the letter I'd been writing to my mother since that original phone call in 2006. I posted it here: "Letter to My Mother--FINAL!--After 2yrs3mos--Incomprehensibly Long..." I e-mailed the document to the young lady at the hotel's front desk and had her print out two copies of it. Yes, it came to a full thirty pages. I kept both copies in my black, leather folder just in case.
Well Mom and Dad showed up at my hotel around 5:45pm on Saturday evening, May 31st. Mom got out of their mini-van and greeted me tearfully, hugging me, saying, "Jon, it's been nearly four years!!!" It's actually been nearly three years; minor miscalculation. I came over to the driver's side, and gave Dad a hug too, then got into the back of the van. We drove through downtown Midland, Michigan, looking for a place to eat dinner, Mom and Dad engaged in their usual light bickering. We finally decided on the local Applebee's.
I had decided that I wouldn't broach anything related to my departure from the Watchtower Society. But if they insisted on discussing it or pleading with me to "return to Jehovah," I would go there.
So...they didn't go there. At all. I couldn't believe it. I mean it was the proverbial elephant in the living room, but, other than talking about bits of their lives that certainly revolve around congregational activities, they let it go. We talked about my new home in Arizona, how my daughter was doing in college, things related to my career... They told me about my three siblings and their families, some of their plans for the Summer, etc. I detected no tension and we really didn't run out of things to say.
When we got back to the hotel, I ran in quickly to retrieve the present I'd gotten for them. It was a live cactus plant, so they could think of me in my new desert setting when they looked at it. Mom got out and embraced me, crying loudly. Of course she always used to do that! But this time it was quite a bit more sad. I told her to come and visit me in Phoenix; I'd use some of my many frequent flyer miles to bring her and Dad out sometime. I really couldn't hear her over the sobs, so I didn't continue along these lines.
So, although I spent more than two years working on that thirty-page letter, I didn't actually give it to them... In a way, it's a little disappointing. I'd so love for them to read what I wrote. But, the truth is, Dad is 75 and Mom 74. I see no reason to try to bring their world down--even if I could. And, the fact is, if they're okay with talking to me while adopting a "don't ask, don't tell" policy, I'm okay with it too.
That said, I'm glad so many of you enjoyed the letter, and I hope it proves helpful to someone.