Posts by misguided

22

OMG - I Did It ! I Really, Really, Did It !

by Nellie in

i bought a christmas tree!!

the kids kept asking me, "are we celebrating xmas this year?

" they asked the same thing last year.

misguided

Congratulations...that's one Wal-Mart purchase you won't regret.

Enjoy making memories,

Rose

60

Post a message to your congregation right here

by JH in

jw
friends

post here, what you would love to say in front of all the congregation.

.

I'd love to walk up to one or two specific elders from my congregation and say: '"See that? It's been 6 years since I left "jehovah" and all your fear-inspiring predictions for me have proven no more true than your end-of-the-world predictions. You've disfellowshipped me during this time, but outside of losing my parents, it has not affected me like you said it would.

You said if I left "jehovah" that I would lose control of my children - that without "jehovah" in their life they'd become promiscuous and drug abusers. They'd have no goals in life. You said that if I left "jehovah" my world would fall apart, and would probably not be able to financially survive without having "jehovah's blessings" in my life.

And look, my kids are turning out better than some whose parents are still together and attending meetings. My oldest daughter is 19 today, in her 2nd year of university, drug-free, and working part-time and currently reading the bible (not NWT) on her own. My 2nd will be 18 in January, 3rd 16 in February, and 4th 15 in May - all working, all on the honour roll in school, drug-free, don't drink, and are home every night. No one has STDs, or had an abortion - in fact, they're all NOT even sexually active. My 5th, 13, and 6th, 9, are still too young to predict how they'll be, but so far, my kids are better than even I expected when I left. They're probably better than if I had remained in "jehovah's" loving (NOT) organization and driven them crazy with all your crazy rules and time-consuming commitments.

I did not lose my ablility to cope - like you said I would without "jehovah's'' support. I have managed to get through college as a single parent with a 4.0 G.P.A, obtain a great job in the field, and have been employed there for 5 years now. I still have my home, in spite of the fact I receive no child support (and the fact that some of your members are responsible for allowing my ex to work for them for cash to avoid being guarnisheed - breaking the law - using theocratic warfare strategy?)

I am appreciated rather than viewed as a burden. I have respect from those I respect in return. I've had more love and support from those in the world who barely know me than the "loving family" in which I grew up. Even more than the gifts of money I have recently recieved, are the gifts of words received from those who actually COMPLIMENT and SUPPORT me on what I've managed to accomplish. This includes doctors, teachers, social workers, and preachers/pastors (even though I'm not involved with any religion at this time.) It's nice to be viewed as actually meeting society's standards - rather than never being able to measure up to the 'Society's' rules. I can make personal choices for myself - and not get criticized for them.

I'm off of all the antidepressant/anti anxiety medications I was on while still attending meetings. I've regained my ability to communicate and to think for myself. I've regained some self-esteem. (Probably too much by the contents of this post - it's just once I started writing this reply, it became therapeutic and passionate! Honestly, I'm not trying to brag - it's just what I'd like to say to those elders.)

Ha - I've proved you all wrong. You should be ashamed you ever attached 'jehovah's'' name to your haughty predictions for me. Now I see yoür words as "jehovah's holy ones" as no more than words to incite fear in me to remain non-thinking compliant drone with my kids following in my footsteps. I'm so glad to have broken free and my children thank me for having got us out from "Jehovah's spiritual paradise - his loving organization's'' control.

Oh, wait..."jehovah'' is nothing more than a book publishing corporation that supports nothing but its own interests. Too bad I lost its blessing. It's worked out well for me."

Sorry, for that rant. Take it for what it's worth - not much...It just felt so good to write it...

Rose

Okay...should I push the post button on this one? Ahh, well what the he## here it goes...

54

Jerry Bergman, Ph.D. (psy) - JW insights

by AhHah in

jw
friends

this site also contains articles by ken raines, who seems to have developed the site.. url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/.

url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/story.html (ken raines).

url http://www.premier1.net/~raines/papers.html (j. bergman).

misguided

bttt

1

The dream lives on...

by Pathofthorns in

jw
friends

here's to a canadian national hero, terry fox who died 20 years ago at the age of 23 of cancer.

we all look to something greater to save us in times of crisis.

the fact remains that everyone whose ever given something, can feel a little better that in the meantime there exists hope.. the real beauty in people lies not in anything external, nothing that we are born with, but lies in what we can do for someone else.. [url] http://www.nlc-bnc.ca/heroes/efox.htm[/url].

misguided

as I've just accepted a ring from Terry Fox's cousin...I think it's time for me to bring his memory bttt!

55

I just emailed the Dr. Phil show

by J-ex-W in

i just emailed the dr. phil show with significant aspects of my story--not just the jw stuff but with being a large part of the complicated picture and said i would be willing to air my issues on their show.

the hidden horrors of marital sex abuse and of sleep-rape, specifically, must be exposed to the general public.

too many believe that it's not even possible to rape a sleeping woman...and they are soooo wrong, as my firsthand experience attests!!!

misguided

I did, too...I backed up your story with mine...

Rose

42

Why Do You Like JWD???

by minimus in

jw
friends

i must admit, i've learned so much here!!!

!

misguided

One month and seven days ago, I still believed that soon armageddon would come and destroy me because I was worthless.

4 years after my df''ing, I was still feeling this way...and be bloodguilty for taking my 6 kids with me.

As you who grew up in the JW's all know, when you first leave the org...the pendulum tends to swing way far over, indulging in all the things you weren't allowed to do all your life, to settle where, I believe, is who you were meant to be, morally/ethically speaking.

I reached a point in my life where I was no longer doing anything "wrong" - as in smoking, dope, or un-wts-approved sex. I was considering a return, when I decided to do that forbidden internet search before going back. I landed here. What an oasis!

People who knew what I was going through! People who understood. I found a place where, to the best of their ability posters/moderators try to keep the posts honest, even when it sides with the WTS. Posters who challenge certain posts fairly when the posts verge on the untrue or are blatantly wrong. I appreciate the honesty. I appreciate the fact that the board is moderated, and that individual points of view are respected, but attacks on someone are not.

It has become my place to deprogram. To learn the truth about the "truth" and ultimately heal. I find myself visiting this site when those above feelings re-emerge...and they still do from time-to-time.

Thank you all for making JWD what it is!

Thank you Simon & Angharad.

Rose

29

Elders and shepherding calls

by sspo in

jw
friends

for all the years you were in the borg, i was wondering how many of you received a friendly shepherding call from the elders?

.

that was part of their responsibility as elders but in over 30 years i never received one and i found that was the case with many in the cong.. did you regularly receive a visit?

misguided

I had few shepherding calls from one caring elder while going through a divorce.

My now ex-husband (an elder's son) moved into a woman from his work's home 10 days before our 5th baby was born. Our oldest was just 5 1/2.

This caring elder is now (13 years later) df'd as an apostate.

I sent him a Christmas card this year. I told him he made a difference in my life, and thanked him.

Rose

32

What was your final straw that broke your back in terms of doctrine?

by ukescott in

as ex-mormon, my exposure to a different version of the first vision story which was quite different from the offical first vision was my beginning way out of mormonism.

what about you ex-jw's?

what, in terms of wt doctrine, made you realize that the wt is a fraud?.

misguided

To me... things just didn't add up. Not just one thing, many things. This is before I read COC or joined ex-jw websites. That just reaffirmed my deciscion.

One day I''m sitting at the KH and it hits. I'm studiously, passionately trying to make sense of things and realize that just are not going to ever make sense, because they don't make sense.

The lack of love and charity were big ones for me (being left by an elder's son 10 days before our 5th baby was born when our oldest was 5 1/2 - when he decided to move in with a woman from his work). The "world" was so more compassionate to me than those who I considered my "family".

Rose

67

anyone feeling a wee bit guilty about celebrating Thanksgiving and Xmas??

by Star Moore in

jw
friends

i was feeling a bit guilty about celebrating as this is my 1st year out and i know the history of all the holidays and birthdays are pagan or bloody or idolatrous.. .

but i was thinking that it's not what someone made them in the past but what they are right now.. to us, at this moment.

am i going to sit down on thanksgiving.. and say, "i hate those indians, think i'll go kill some"..????