Sassy

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Posts by Sassy

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  29

  How Long Will You Stay Here?

  by Stacy Smith in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when will you be done with this forum?

  a year?

  will leaving be a sign of moving on?.

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  Sassy

  I haven't thought about how long I'll be here. I just got here. Is there a time limit or need for an end?
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  50

  If your still-JW parent died...

  by starfish422 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  would you attend the funeral/memorial service?

  assuming that it would be held in a kh; or even if it wasn't.. this is something that's been on my mind lately; honestly, i'm not sure why.

  my parents are both still relatively young; 60 and 61. my dad has been diagnosed with skin cancer but both are otherwise healthy.. i really don't know whether i would; particularly for my father.

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  Sassy

  wow. I hadn't thought about this. If my mom died, boy, practively everyone in the whole circuit knows me, knows my mom. Because I moved away, most don't know I chose to stop but my closest friend back home does. If I came, no doubt she has already told a number of mutual friends and they would all have their noses up to me. hmm.. Well I guess I would go any way. I'd just sit next to my dfd sister. We'd give each other strength.
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  40

  My Best Friends Still Love Me

  by Piph in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i had a talk with my best friend (who is still an active jw) the other day, and told her that i wasn't interested in remaining an active witness any more.

  i knew she would accept my feelings, because she's a wonderful person and is actually very emotionally healthy, but was afraid because i didn't really know how tight a grip the mind control had on her, and didn't know if she would feel obligated to back off in our friendship any.

  i was deeply afraid of that, because we're as close, if not closer than, sisters.. to my pleasant surprise, she not only totally accepted my feelings, but she already knew what i was going to say before i said it.

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  Sassy

  Glad to see you are hanging in there even though times are not easy. Sorry that a friend who seemed to be there for you isn't there like she first seemed she would be. I'm going through the same stuff right now. In a way closing a door on long time friendships because even the most supportive (as possible under the circumstances) are in an awkward position and others turned on me with full force because of my decision. I've lost most contact with mom now due to the situation. She says she will stand by Jeh and his organization even if it means her life so that was her answer to me leaving and our relationship. The org was more important to her than our relationship. She'll stay where she is, even if it means losing another child/her last (to the world).

  Since it is all new for me too, I can't say for a certainty it gets easier, but I am sure those here who have been through it longer can. I am just thinking new friends will be made and somehow the bond between family now injurred will still have some ways of mending or at least we come to accept the terms we can live with.

  We have each other Piph. Hang in there.
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  18

  Has being a Witness caused clinical Depression with any of you?

  by Singing Man in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  for me i would say that half the reason i am depressed is directly cause from being raised a witness, i am 50 now.

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  Sassy

  being a witness caused me to try to take my life a few years ago. Too much stress and when I 'fell short' and got into just a "little" trouble with a 'brother' and a "FRIEND" ran to the elders to tattle on me, I couldn't handle it all and took a bottle of pills and a bottle of whiskey. It's so ironic looking back because I hadn't really even done anything with him but she was claiming I had and to face the elders and the stress was more than I could take. Then when I didn't end up dying but only slept for two days by a miracle, I figured I was in trouble now and should have been dead so I really did go out and get into real trouble (or fun depending on how you look at it). But since I wasn't ready to leave the JW life then, I felt so guilty that I kept thinking I still needed to take pills and do it right this time. I ended up in therapy eventually which helped me out.
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  31

  6 Of 9. Is He Who he Says He Is?

  by Englishman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  here's 6 of 9. i saw this pic being taken at the fest, so i know it's him.. .

  it's france's goal-keeper who plays for the national side and once played for manchester united:.

  englishman.

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  Sassy

  I think six stands in a class all by himself.. Can't say when I met him, he reminded me of anyone else.

  and no way can anyone match his wit!
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  29

  I had to DF my brother a few days ago!

  by cyberguy in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i had to df my brother a few days ago!

  i just wanted to visit him and my family late december.

  anyway, he said, "we don?t want you here!

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  Sassy

  ahhh. I'm sorry to hear about your pain. The way this religion divides families is the what bothers me the most. Your damned if you do and damned if you don't. To keep people you love in your life you have to what? believe or pretend to, something you don't. Its sad. Family should be thicker than anything but not in this faith. Its ironic because when I was in, my dad wanted nothing to do with me because I was one and now that I will gain my dad back I'll lose my mom. Something is wrong with a picture in which family members are torn apart.

  I'm sorry about your brother. We're here for you.

  {{{{{{{{ Cyberguy }}}}}}}}}}}}}
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  77

  I'm going to be published!!!

  by Lady Lee in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a couple of years ago i was part of an on-line writers group.

  a few of us got together and wrote an anthology of xmas stories called tales of christmas.. i wrote a story about my first xmas after leaving the dubs.

  the book is being published.

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  Sassy

  Congrats! I would love to read your book. I'll have to go and look for it after it is released and on the shelves.
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  43

  Going through a painful Divorce

  by caspian in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just waiting for the final "decree absolute" to come through in the next 3 weeks or so.. but man why is it so hard, the final break.

  i really need this to be over so i can finally get on with the rest of my life.. .

  cas..feeling a little sorry for himself today.. feel free to offer any support or advice.

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  Sassy

  My divorce will be finally in January (filed with the courts in July). I bounced back from this relatonship because I knew it was a mistake only days after the wedding. Only the elders slowed down my 'getting out'... But divorcing my first husband was very intense, bitter, very emotional. I feel for anyone going through a divorce. Just remember to take one day at a time, and every day will be a day farther from the pain and on with your life and something better. Sometimes we find strength we had no idea we even had when we go through things. And as you can see, many here know what you are going through and can relate. There are strength in numbers and you aren't alone.
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  55

  What Would Happen If You Just Walked Into A Kingdom Hall This Sunday?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  that's the question my wife asked me this morning.

  "what would happen if we just walked into the kingdom hall this morning?

  would the elders be waiting to talk to us?

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  Sassy

  If I walked into the hall, the first thing that would happen is the elders asking me if they could meet with me for a short while after the meeting was over. Nope.. don't want to deal with that.
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  49

  Since You've Stopped Going To Meetings, What's Your General Outlook?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .....in life?

  do you still have hope?

  are you truly much happier?

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  Sassy

  I am happier. I know that the impact of a change in my relationship with family and a few friends will put a small cloud on it, but overall I am so much happier not being so restrained or feeling like I never doing enough. The stress of always knowing no matter what you were doing, you could improve, I do not miss at all. I don't miss feeling guilty about not enough hours in service, not getting to enough meetings.. Did I have a drink too many? or my dating a non JW and how 'wrong' it is. Well I love him and am so glad to have him in my life.

  My outlook though is questionable. I used to have this all figured out, what the future held. Now I have no idea. It is a little scary.