DD, a lot of what you choose to do depends on your basic level of anxiety in your daily life. do you feel that you need help in this time of crisis? I agree you probably ly do need to learn new coping skills, we all do. IF you need it, medication WILL help you to copem it's not a crutch, just an assistance for you.
Your wife has just been totally manipulated, and is terrified that she will loose you, don't forget the vague feelings of disdain in the jw for those with an unbelieving mate.?? she's under UNBELIEVABLE pressure, as are you....
good luck with whatever you do, but make sure you look after yourself....