I have successfully left but as you should know, JWs never let go or give up. Yes, I am whining and maybe even looking for a way out. Try living life day-to-day with someone that you know thinks you are going to be destroyed and your children too. Listen every day about how corrupt the world is and how bad people are and only Jehovah can help. Listen to the condemnation of every holiday that comes along. And helping out with charities...only God's Kingdom can really help people, not charities.
Then go look at the history on our computer and see the porn sites visited one after another and listen to the drunken arguments about when the symptoms of my disease (leaving the JWs) first started. And no, I don't have a problem with porn....I have a problem with the typical JW judgmental mentality that is always ready to condemn and see people destroyed while the rafter is lodged in their eye. I love my husband for what he used to be, but I hate the aura of hypocrisy and superiority that I live with while he's commenting about making sure his relationship with Jehovah stays on track and his service stays strong. And of course, he always tells me how much he loves me and hopes we can work through things; that he only wants me to be happy.
Whine? Bitter, confused and angry? Yeah, I guess. As I said from the beginning, I don't know what I want or expect; I just thought I could vent. Hey, I guess you could just use the excuse my husband uses with the 'friends': 'She's going through menopause and just freaked out'!