Welcome aboard, and congratualtions on taking the blue pill. Great job on raising free children with free minds. What more could a parent hope for!
I am an unbelieving mate of some accomplishments, although my wife is still in. You will find many friends here, and many who will give you great advice. Our most recent success story is Ithinkisee. He was a former bethelite who spent a year slowly building the groundwork for his wife's exit. Now they are planning their life together in a new location free from jw slavery. There are so many more. So have courage.
The checklist.... usually a fine ubm named JGnat takes care of this. She will probably add to whatever I forget. I know alot of this is a little late since you left 7 years ago and are an open apostate. I would agree with another poster that you probably have some obligation to try to free your husband's mind. He wants to be free. There is just another personality superimposed on his that says all that other silly stuff.
1. Never criticize the org. Your job is to ask questions, that lead to thoughts, that allow THEM to question the legitimacy of the org. Eventually you need to ask him questions that will help him to develop a new, non-cult perspective.
2. All efforts to free his mind must be based in trust. He must trust you. He must have things that he can relate to you with spiritually. Without trust all other efforts are a waste of time. I know you are an open apostate. I know you have been through alot. But you are the bait. He can't pass up an opportunity to save you. By being less hostile, and actually curious, it will open the conversation that you need to have with him.
3. Get Releasing the Bonds by Steven Hassan. It is a how to get your loved one out of a cult book. It would probably do you some good, since you were in as well. This is the book I and others are using to open our loved ones mind, and deal with all the phobias.
I sense that you are at the end of your rope with your marriage? I can't tell you what to do there. I hope whatever you do, you won't have any regrets. I personally am not at a point where I could live with myself if I left my wife behind. That is the question that haunts us all I suppose.
Hope some of that helps. Sorry if it is obvious, or stuff you already knew. Sorry for all you have been through. We are legion!