Did Your Experience As A Witness REALLY "Damage" You? (page 4)

HadEnuf

Damaged goods. Repair efforts still taking place.

wiegel

OldSoul - you touched a nerve:

I am damaged. I am emotionally ill-equipped for a world without structure, order, and stable expectations. I am, in many ways, retarded by my long-term exposure to the teachings of Jehovah's Witnesses.

so I'll just second that emotion. 25 years in 5 years out 54 years old trudy

Lady Lee

Damaged? In some ways yes and others no.

In my family there was so much abuse/abandonment/neglect going on even before the WTS that sometimes it is hard to separate the different aspects of damage.

Stunted growth and development. A difficulty in knowing what "normal" is. Having "normal relationships with family.

For me recovery is like peeling an onion. Each layer produces its own levels of pain/trauma and healing. And sometimes I never know just when its time to peel off a new layer.

But as I work my way through each new layer I continue to find that I am stronger in the broken places

DannyHaszard

Soul Rape of FOUR generations of myself and family.

SPAZnik

Being a witness was not without cost, but then, what is?

avishai

They........tried......to....take...my......FAMILY!!!! You know, the thing people give millions of dollars when it's kidnapped? Die for?

As far as the immediate family, I WON!!! I was wayyyy luckier than most. Extended? Most I'll never get back. Some I'm now talking to, they were df'd way back, but it's still akward.

Damaged? I don't know. Pissed off? Yeah. Lot's. At the lies, the cover ups, larceny, etc. Very, very, pissed off.

I was damaged. In my 20's people close to kept saying i must have been sexually abused. I wasnt, and now realise that the controlling abuse of organisation had the same emotional affect on my boundaries. The last few years i have been pretty emotionally unstable.

6 months ago i made the emotional break from the org and now feel quite together. I think that growing up a JW destroyed some of my potential, but trained me in other areas. Over time I see that my life will be what it was meant to be and the past will just be part of the journey.

GentlyFeral

Well, as recently as six months ago, I would have said yes.

Mind you, I'm still behind financially; the three of us are living in a forty-five-year-old trailer because it's all we can afford. We wouldn't have been so far behind if we hadn't been lied to about the evils of higher education, the true nature of "materialism," and our mortality.

But that is fixable – a fact I did not know for sure until this year! I have finally closed the crippling holes in my confidence, and new, live, solid soul is growing under the scab. That doesn't mean I'll never be afraid, worried, shocked or grieved again; only that I know that I know my whole life isn't going to be that way!

Part of it is finding and getting used to new frames of reference; the rest is proving my own competence to myself.

Hey, did you know that you're more likely to earn a million dollars by your own efforts than to win the lottery?

gently feral

jwfacts

Garrybuss - "My worst time was my 18 years as an inactive believing walkaway. Now is the best time."

I spent 10 years as a not realy believing witness, a frustrating time too. Sites like this snapped me out of it, gave me perspective, I see great benefit being able to understand what others believe and gain some perspective.

hamsterbait

YES

When I was a youngster and the family joined, I still had issues over abuse experienced before hearing "the good news".

Of course in those days we were indoctrinated that it was evil to seek psychological help. All my self esteem/sex terror issues were stuffed down, to be cured in the new world. You didn't even mention them in case we brought reproach. My reality was mocked and marginalised.

But the new world never came. I began to fade after the generation thing. (Don't you think that is a defining moment for many on this board?)

As a result I am an alcoholic (recovering - sort of - I succeed and fail from day to day) To suddenly discover the gift is not inside the pretty parcel was a big kick in the groin. Don't live your life until the new world. New world ain't comin' - tough. I'm going to die, without leaving any worthwhile contribution to humanity all because we listened to s.o. at the door saying we don't live now - we'll live forever in the Kingdom.

HB

Did Your Experience As A Witness REALLY "Damage" You?

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