What is a 'Momma's Boy'...

by jeanniebeanz 43 Replies latest jw friends

  • FlyingHighNow
    If men could screw their mothers they would never bother getting married.
    I think men would rather pour caustic soda on their genitals rather than do that.

    My goodness, I think my son would find that statement very amusing. And I think he'd rather slam his fingers in the door over and over and over again than to think such a thing. Either one of these for that matter. Hey, JoelBear, you wouldn't be indecisive would you, on this issue?

  • kls
    Momma's Boyz tend to be bred from fathers who are often emotionally un-available for their sons. Some of us who've had fathers who were distant, unreachable and aloof and unsure as to who they were as men, could never really effectively relate to thier sons. Their mothers may have been all that they had to latch onto. So, when we as boys are left only with an emotional outlet from our mothers, it's only natural that we tend to gravitate towards the one most able to deliver over that much needed and desired affection.

    Prop, i don't know where you read this or what but you are so right.

  • prophecor

    Hi K. I only got it from having lived it and am living thru it. My mom was the closest person I had as regards a parent. Pop was just off in his own world, somewhere. He knew very well, it seemed how to relate to the girls, my sisters, but when it came to me, I was like a Rubiks-Cube gone scattered. He didn't really know how to relate to a son.

    I was my mother's child, not my father's ( emotionally speaking ) and we we're often at odds with each other from almost infancy. I was always trying so desperately to get close to him, would do virtually anything to please him, however to no avail. It didn't take me long to realize that there surely must've been something wrong with me.

    Mother was the only asset that I had, the only other adult that I could bond with. So she quickly became my life line. He was often emotionally un-available for her as well, so we fed off of each other. We nursed each other's neediness, without my even realizing that it was going to present problems in my adult life inthe future.

    I learned later on in my life, how he'd come to suffer the same fate as a child from his not having a good relationship with his father. They were never close, and subsequently, he too was a momma's boy. Though I would've never guessed it in a million years, he seemed so stand-offish, I never really could associate his being so close to his mother or anybody, for that matter.

  • kls

    Prop, but my husband ( kids father ) was never around when the kids were small ,working a lot and never missing meetings so i was all they really ever had, but i never thought of it the way you so perfectly explain it . Gawd ,now it makes so much sense.

    Sorry for your dad being so distant Prop but your mom did a great job ,you turned out to be a great person.

  • prophecor

    Nothing necessarilly wrong with being a momma's boy, KLS. Mothers are the lifeline and being with her as long as I was, was not the worst thing that could've happened to me.

    Dad wasn't in the truth though he was one to go to the hall on occasions. He never really took to it. I never even knew what the truth was until sometime after his abandoning mom entirely, to go off and find himself, wherever that was.

    Moms can do wonders. I wouldn't place such an inordinate blame on yourself. What I've presented is a view that is extreme. It had its challenges, but it's been blessed with many triumphs as well.

  • jeanniebeanz

    There have been so many good responses here. What burns me up is when a man is just unavailable for his son, the son turns to the mother for love and support, and then their fathers call them "Momma's Boy" like it's some kind of insult.

    Good Grief. What do these guys expect will happen? Children need to support, and if they don't get any from their dads, they'll turn to their moms.

    It isn't rocket science...


  • Es

    My man is a bit of a mummys boy, its so frustrating, I guess coz i have learned to live without family i dont need them, but he does and constantly As many would know on this board i dont like his mother and he cant for the life of him figure out why, i have explained it many times to him and he just says "Oh my mum is not like that". What every mummy wants mummy gets, she is always going to be right in his eyes. es

  • lonelysheep

    What is a Mommas Boy?

    My husband. Unfortunately, I didn't realized the depth of it until after getting married and living together. She comes first and always will.

    She stayed with her husband who was never faithful, leaving her with him all the time. He eventually left her and married someone else. And she's crazy to me while I find my husband pathetic in a lot of ways. Yes, he knows how I feel and tries to justify it to me.

    If men could screw their mothers they would never bother getting married.

    Agreed, Katie. Elsewhere: I feel the same. Mecurious: At least you aren't in denial!

  • Country Girl
    Country Girl

    My first marriage was to a Mamma's boy and it was a nightmare! Such interference in our affairs. It really was difficult. Eventually we divorced and he went and found another woman, and she became the target of the Mother-In-Law. Then I became the ex-MIL's favorite.. hehehhe. It was a nice turnaround!


  • CountryGuy

    I guess I've always had a different definition of "Momma's Boy."

    To me it was never about putting your mother before anyone else in your life. It just meant that you have a stronger connection to your mother than to your father. It's not that you don't love your father, becaus you do, it's just that you have a stronger bond with your mom. (My sister is exactly the opposite, she's a "Daddy's Girl.")

    Some of you know my background: I moved out of my parents house at 18. Moved back in at 20 to, among other things, help take care of things while my father was recovering from an accident. Back out at 22 and haven't been back. Before meeting Wayne, I did all my own cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. (Of course, now, we split the duties.)

    I've been proud to wear that label, as has Wayne.


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