Other Types of Abuse...

RichieRich

Anyone who regularly reads this site is well aware of the sexual abuse scandals amongst JW congregations worldwide. (For those not familiar, visit www.SilentLambs.org)

Not to make light of those who were sexually abused, but I think there is an epedimic of other types of abuse in the Org.

How many here have been, or know of, someone who was "spanked" regularly and excessively? I know I was, and I feel that this wasn't just because of my misbehavior, I think it was a culmination of several things:

Stress of trying to please Jehovah and the Elders
The fact that spanking is condoned, and even endorsed by the Society
Encouragment from other Dub parents

I always found it tough to swallow that Jehovah's Witnesses are supposed to be nonviolent, and yet, in the same breath, they will drag their children out of public view and beat the living daylights out of them.

I know my mother would sometimes give me a spanking JUST TO REMIND ME SHE COULD. On occasion, it would go beyond spankings and onto choking, punching, and having things thrown at you.

I feel that once we all talk about it, we will see a serious problem inside the Org of JWs seriously abusing their children.

So my questions are:

Were you spanked?
How Regularly / severly?
Did your parent ever "lose control" and truly BEAT you?
Do you know of others who were worse off?
How widespread do you feel this problem is?

love2Bworldly

My parents were not JWs, but I remember crying one time because I couldn't stand the way one lady was constantly beating on her little girl. The girl was just a baby--less than two years old. Little kids have a hard time sitting still for 2 hours for a boring meeting and do not need a spanking when they are just acting like little kids the way nature made them.

I used to walk my babies in the back of the KH if they became restless or noisy. I tried to be sensitive to other people being able to pay attention to the meetings, so I was surprised once when I received a tap on the shoulder by an attendant that my baby was being too noisy and that other people were complaining. Babies go through different stages and before age one, they like to listen to their own voice and will babble--it's very cute; used to really piss me off when people would spank their little babies for babbling.

avishai

Oh, yeah. Here's one thread about it.

http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/12/49361/1.ashx

Oh, and here's another http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/8/65511/1.ashx

candidlynuts

Were you spanked? rarely, always accompanied by a lecture and had to tell what lesson i'd learned...( learned not to start fires under the house to roast marshmellows lol)
How Regularly / severly? only till about 6 yrs old never severely, after 6 yrs old punishment was chores
Did your parent ever "lose control" and truly BEAT you? never
Do you know of others who were worse off? yes
How widespread do you feel this problem is? i feel its a problem because i've seen mothers spank very small infants at KH's and conventions. and i've seen so much verbal abuse of kids the screaming and threats seem more traumatizing than a spanking would be. and at one time there was a communal wooden spoon in the ladies room at the hall..

i have great parents so i'm not personally affected by this. i had 4 kids and they had their bottoms smacked a couple of times ( 1 for running out in the road, one for sticking stuff in light sockets, that kind of thing.. i could recount each and every spanking i ever gave the kids,they were that rare.)

discipline in my family was, never in anger, always with a lesson, parents had 7 kids so they were firm, yes meant yes, no meant no kind of thing , but never harsh, never violent.and i tried to follow their example with my own kids.many times after age 6, when i'd get in trouble i'd get a good " talkin to" by my dad, and extra chores and i'd rather have had a spanking ! again, spankings in our home were never violent, never left marks .

mrsjones5

I know my mother would sometimes give me a spanking JUST TO REMIND ME SHE COULD. On occasion, it would go beyond spankings and onto choking, punching, and having things thrown at you.

My husband's mother did that when she was raising her boys (3 of them). She called it "GP" short for general principle, meaning she whooped their behinds with anything she could get her hands on (in one case it was a car fanbelt) because she just knew they did something. Didnt know what, but she was gonna whoop them just in case. I call it child abuse.

Josie

whyamihere

Were you spanked? Yes!

How Regularly / severly? Oh a few times a week or more. I would say 50/50 on the severly part. My mother had a wooden beating tool...it was about 1 foot long and 2 inches thick. We all called it the stick. She would keep it in her purse at all times.

Did your parent ever "lose control" and truly BEAT you? Yeah a few times...I never talk about it though. My older brother was thrown down the stairs a few times.

Do you know of others who were worse off? Oh yeah....my cousins were beat alot..I was to say everyday. I was beat by my cousins mother for just waking up from my nap to early. When I say beat I mean naked on a bed with my arms over my head and whipped with a green plastic belt over and over....I was about 5 or 6.

How widespread do you feel this problem is? I don't really know. I think it is a problem but I don't know how wide spread.

Brooke

EvilForce

My friend's father would beat all the kids before they got into the car for a long car ride. He'd say "This is for what you are going to do". Of course he was an "new elder" too and held up as an "ideal" parent. I always thought he was a jackarse.

luna2

There were plenty of spankings at the KH's I attended for sure....the one in CT, I think, had less of that than the one in IL. It seems that each congregation has it's own personality that is derived from the PO, elders and other strong-minded individuals.

As for real beatings, I think most that suffered those did so at home for the most part. I knew of one elder who used either a belt or an actual rod on his kids that left bruises on their backs, rear ends and thighs. From what I understand, he was always consciously careful to hit them where it wouldn't be visible...and I certainly don't remember ever seeing his kids sporting bruises, so he was successful in hiding what he was doing. I don't think anybody knew about it until he and his wife were having marital problems and she spilled the beans to some sisters...not sure if she told the elders about it or not.

There was another elder who was pretty rough with his stepsons...guess one time he really lost control in front of a young guest who was visiting from TX and the boy went back, very troubled, and related what happened to an elder in his congregation who also had ties to the IL congregation. I know he called and talked to the PO (a big Mr. Do-nothing if there ever was one), as well as the elder who was doing the beating. I doubt it did much good, other than to make said elder more careful.

Sith

Spanking always makes me think of my best friend growing up, and his mother. My friend's mother was the epitome of a "faithful witness" and followed the WTBTS instructions and advice to the letter. By the time her moved out of her house, my friend was more than a foot taller than her and probably weighed 130 pounds more. She insisted that spanking was Jehovah's approved method of disciple. More times than I can count, I watched her take him into one of the bedrooms of her house and hit him with her paddle as hard as she could. Each offense carried with it a certain number of "swats". When she was done with him, he'd walk out of the room biting his lip to keep from laughing.

After which we'd usually jump into my car and head off to the liquor store to try to buy some beer.

katiekitten

Yes it was a kind of spiritual competition at our congregation. It was always great, as a kid, if someone else got taken out to the back room screaming 'help me jehovah help me'.

I got spanked regularly. Never in anger, always accompanied by a painful lecture about exactly why this punishment was being administered as a loving gesture from jehovah, and wouldnt it be worse if nobody even cared whether I was being naughty or not. (HMmmm, dunno, can we try it?)

I was spanked on my bottom up until I was 16. I definately felt that it verged on the pervy, but I think dad thought he was doing the right thing. Now hes not a dub he pretends it never happened.

Other Types of Abuse...

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