Would you change your past if you could?

by John Doe 36 Replies latest jw friends

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    I used to live with many regrets, thinking that I'd screwed up. Recently, I've been thinking that regretting past actions is not constructive. Sure, we should base our current actions by assessing the results of our former actions, but regretting decisions we've made is, in effect, yearning to change the person we are now or rejecting ourselves. Afterall, everything that's happened to us in our lives collectively composes an environmental force that has shaped and molded us into who we are. Do those of us who regret our past have an innate self-condemnation that renders us unhappy with the means by which we've become ourselves? Are we dissastisfied with who we are today?

    I've concluded that self-reflection is beneficial, but regret is bad.

    How can we ever be happy with our present if we constantly go around regretting mistakes we've made, even if we learn from those mistakes?

    How can we learn to be thankful for the lives we have, instead of longing for lives that will never exist?

    Well, these are just some late night mind ramblings of a guy who's putting off his homework. :-)

  • OldSoul

    I wouldn't. I like myself now, and if I changed my past my present would be affected in uncertain ways. I would hate to successfully change my past and become someone I didn't like.

  • purplesofa

    If I could change anything in my past it would be, not marrying at 18 the man I married.

    I do like who I am now.......but feel like I had to come full circle to gain back what I lost at 18 and my marriage to him.

    I think it would have been nice to not know about spousal physical abuse, an alcholic, gambler, womanizer, total betrayal, and the effect it had on my life and my childrens life. His treatment of me was the very reason for looking for a way out, leading me to find the truth, which is another decision I made that I have to root out.

    So, early on in life I made a decision I do regret, but I don't live in constant feeling of regret. I learned from all my mistakes, yeah, you make them and learn from them and go on.

    Just would have been nice to not have to go through it all.


  • Mac

    I suspect that people that live in the moment are far less likely to even entertain that fantasy. I personally, would change nothing...the good, the bad or the ugly (yes, I like my spaghetti with a western sauce).

    All those past stitches make up the fabric of your current being so I guess it all boils down to whether you like the person peeking back at you in the mirror.

    mac, 49 years in the making and undergoing constant remodeling class

  • Terry

    I'd be a fool not to change my life.

    It would mean I'd learned nothing at all about life.

    I'd get a damned fine education, for one thing. I'd save money and invest it wisely.

    I'd travel and meet diverse people in different cultures.

    I'd learn languages early on.

    I'd take music lessons.

    I would delay marriage until my forties when I had some sense and life experience.

    I'd secure my life with goals and purposes that were practical instead of patching up the holes and scurrying about trying to mend the damage my foolishness wrought.

    Damned straight I'd cange my past.


  • candidlynuts

    i'd change a few things. sadly, i cant.

  • lilbit

    Nope even with all the bad stuff I wouldnt be who I am now if I changed my past

  • littlerockguy


  • Sparkplug
    a guy who's putting off his homework.

    Sorry John.. no comment on my life and changes, but I had to say that I am right there with you.

    Sparkplug from the "put off homework class"

  • Mac

    Go to yer rooms and don't come out till yer homework is done....the both of yas!!!!

    mac, fireplug class

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