Forgiveness, How Far Do You Take It?

by prophecor 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Forgiveness is one thing, forgetting is another. I forgive way better than I forget...

    J

  • whyamihere
    whyamihere

    I forgive those who are stupid...that means everyone in the KH! Will I forget? NEVER I have had things taken away from me. My wedding all the joy and love was taken from me and I cant get that back. You may be nervous at your wedding. However I was scared about people not showing up those that I thought were friends. I was sick about it. I could not enjoy what was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. Them taking that and me being able to forgive them means I am a better bigger(not fat) person than they are. I will never forget because I can't have that day over again.

    Brooke

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    Thank you all for your responses, every one of you. In light of forgiveness, especially when it comes to those of your family, I'd like to present a scripture which part and parcel, pretty much reflects where it is that my heart has sat for going on about 4 years now. To err, is said, Is is to be human, yet to forgive, divine! So here goes, in light Proverbs 18:19, can God reasonably expect us to be forgiving in all situations? I mean, I'll be the first to admit that I'd be viewed as a bigger person for letting this go, this was, however, no minor issue. If it wasn't such a huge assault on my charachter as a person, I would be willing to let it go, even if the offender never presented me with an honest and authentic apology. I, too, realize that we are no longer under the old covenant and these things no longer have the strength of the New Covenant contract, what, however about the principles and the scriptural implications involved.

    Proverbs 18:19 (Amplified Bible)

    19 A brother offended is harder to be won over than a strong city, and [their] contentions separate them like the bars of a castle.

  • William Penwell
    William Penwell

    I have no problem forgiving a person but I have to say over the years I do not forget. I other words if a friend borrows money off of me and doesn't pay it back, I will forgive them but I sure wouldn't loan them anymore money.

    prophecor

    Also I do forgive you for using that awful color on your print font. lol

    Will

  • mustang
    mustang

    Well, my super-Zealot JW father used forgiveness as a tool, club or other weapon. After I quit attending meetings/KH/FS, he hounded me for 30 years to drag me back. Over the years, I caught him in lies and other trickery to get me back to meetings. Confrontations with him came down to him saying "I did it for your own good".

    Well, for 23 years he called me every 2 weeks. It always ultimately became a harangue to "go back"; and of course, once you were back, it would ratchet up to "do more".

    (I let the wind out of his sails once by saying that maybe I would go back… to meetings, BUT I WOULD NEVER GO OUT IN FS AGAIN. I could feel the lump in his throat from 2500 miles away. The closest that I came to really going back was considering going to a Spanish congo for about 10 minutes one Sunday a month to say that "I went to meetings" so as to get him off my back.)

    He finally let slip once that "I HAD TO FORGIVE HIM". Then I realized that I was playing by his rules and that he had "stacked the deck" with crookedness.

    Jesus said forgive to not just 7 times, but 70 times 7. If you literally do the accounting, that is 490 times. So, do the math: 23 X 26 (times/year) = 598 times. Wow, I literally outdid Jesus’ number of 490!!! So, in a literal sense, that obligation was fulfilled, in spades!!!

    Long-suffering is one thing, but after a while, I had had enough; and it was apparent that Jesus didn’t mean to give license to the abuse of privilege to an obsessed person. You cut off someone who is insincere. If the person is a MANIPULATOR, cut them off long before I did!!!!

    Mustang,

    who is sad that we could never reach an accommodation

  • Puternut
    Puternut

    Prophecor,

    I forgive you writing your post in a light blue color that is barely legible.

  • rwagoner
    rwagoner

    I came home from work many years back to find my roomate/best friend and my girlfriend in bed together. Now they were not doing it to conserve body heat or for any other nobel purpose, it was pure unadulterated monkey love.

    Needless to say I was less than happy.....ok... I was B*** S*** !!!!

    We all talked and it was clear that I was out and he was in..(literally - LOL)......so I moved out of the apartment that he and I shared. A few years late I met my now wife and realized that the incident had actually been a blessing since I would have never met her otherwise...and forgiveness was easy then.

    That was nearly 20 years ago and they have been P***ed at me ever since. I guess they were mad that I moved out or something. Personally I think I had more reason to be mad than they did but oh well... I saw the girl last week and we actually had a decent conversation...maybe forgiveness has finally come to them too...

  • holly
    holly

    I think forgiveness is necessary for your own sanity. im not saying its easy, depending on the issue. my ex husband has never forgiven me for leaving him 8 years ago. in 8 years he hasnt managed to move on, hes filled with bitterness and hatred and is one of the most negative people i have ever known. im surprised he hasnt given himself a heart attack.

    yes, having read some of your posts, it seems easier to forgive than forget. i can remember everyone who owes me money and i can feel smug that they will never have the guts to ask me again bec i have that 'knowing look' whenever the subject of money is risen

  • Maxine Mouse
    Maxine Mouse

    I try to be a forgiving person, but I definitely do not forget. With that said, there are exeptions to that. I am at a time in my life where there is a person very close to me that I will never forgive again for what she has done to me. She never apologized for things she has done in the past, but over time I had forgiven her. She has repeatedly hurt me over the years with no regard to my feelings. The last that happened a few weeks ago was the last straw. I think forgiveness after a certain point is just asking someone to hurt you again. Forgiveness to me is like the old saying, f**k me once shame on you, f**k me twice shame on me.

  • defd
    defd

    prophecor

    From the ? you posed it seems to me you already have the answer but are not satisfied with it. The bible gives us clear instructions on how to deal with oneanother 2Timothy 3:16,17 "All scripture is inspired of God and beneficial for teaching, for reproving, for setting things STRAIGHT, for disciplining in righteousness, that the man of God may be fully competent, completely equipped for every good work". Since Jehovah created us and has been observing mankind since our beginning, He has seen it all dont you think? God has seen what works and what does not work for us. So His councel and direction for us would be the very best for us to follow, even though at times it may be difficult for us. In the long run however if we apply we will benefit in many ways. The bible says at Isaiah 48:17,18 " This is what your repurchaser has said, the Holy One of Isreal. I Jehovah am your God, the One teaching you to BENEFIT yourself, the One causing you to tread in the way in which you should walk. O if only you would actually pay attention to my commandment! Then your peace would would become just like a river and your righteousness would become like the waves of the sea. Imagine having peace like a river! Rivers tend to be endless and deeper than we can see. Thats how are peace will be. Endless and deep within ourselves, Thats true peace. That is why we are instructed to forgive oneanother Because when we hold on to resentment and hurt feelings, it can rob us of peace. It can even have an effect on our health!

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