Not Having Kids in 'This System....'

by lonelysheep 40 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  whyamihere

  Yes I struggle! However, I am a young Mom going through alot and I have a hard time when someone calls me Mommy. It's still weird.I was first Pregnant at 21 and I was married at 19. I still have no idea what I am doing half the time. People call me up and ask how I am doing and how are the kids. I always tell them they are happy, healthy, and I haven't broken them, or killed them life must be good. Yeah, I want more but I don't want them right now. My husband works all day then has school, and then he plays in a band. I am basically a single parent with the hours I put in. So in time after he is done with school and, my kids are in school I may have more but, as of now I can't because my kids have so much energy and, life in them its hard to deal with. I sometimes ask are they normal. My first kid slept 5 hours in a 24 period for 6 months. That was really hard. It is getting better with time and, they are sleeping more. I hope to god I don't have twins ever!

  Brooke
• 

  franklin J

  yes, I knew other pioneers who felt that way.

  But I always knew that I wanted a family and this whole " waiting for the new system" routine never made sense to me.

  I suspect those who make the decision to not have a family , are only using the "waiting for the new system" slogan as an excuse.

  Having children is a personal decision. Some just do not want the responsibility; and do not want to admit it. Other cannot have them for what ever reason.

  In my case; they are my pride and joy; and really make my life worthwhile. I cannot imagine my life without them.
• 

  Gill

  Hi Brooke!

  I wouldn't wish twins on my worst enemy especially the non sleeping variety that we have!

  All my kids found it against their religion to sleep through the night!

  Like you, i was married at 19 and had my first at 21. So, now they're 19 and 20 and where has the time gone?

  It's definitely not against their religion to sleep now, though!!!!!

  Give them lots of loves and cuddles. ignore the naughty things they do and praise all the good things. Loving them makes them want to reward you with more good behaviour. My only regrets are for following WTBTS advice on smacking them. A tap on the hand is the most it should be. There are so many other ways to discipline them that works better.

  My youngest is 5 now and she NEVER sleeps through the night. We have adapted and we get by. Older kids help us with the little ones all the time.

  As I said before Brooke, enjoy your time with them. Man! How the time flys. Where did it all go?

  Some real sweet memories though. Sorry your husband has to be away for so long though. It must be tough on you!
• 

  Bumble Bee

  My husband and I decided to not have children. I think part of it was being raised in the "borg". All the stories my mom told us about whta the GT would be like, what we would have to go through, hearing parts at assemblies not to have children in this old system, blah, blah, blah!!

  Part was both of us being young when we got married, and he just didn't feel mature enough to be a father (still feels that way at 37! lol). I felt like I practically raised my half brother and sister, and just needed a break from children. (I did the dirty diapers, the feedings in the middle of the night, the hospital emergency rooms, the school trips etc.) I'm now 36, my husband has had a vasectomy so our decision pretty much final. I still wonder from time to time what our life would be like now if we had children. My hubby said he would go for a reversal if I really really felt strongly about having a child. I wrestle with the decision all the time! My clock is starting to tick really fast now, so if we were going to have a child, he'd better make that appointment soon!!

  BB
• 

  duckie

  My ex and I decided not to have kids, we are now divorsed and he is D'f I am a fader.

  I have remarried and now am at the age where having kids brings great risks, it is the one thing that I am most angry about, I would love to have kids and am so angry with the Borg, the Borg that sucked me into giving up my natural right as a woman!!!!
• 

  DHL

  Since it seems that the only "new" JWs are children of the current ones, I wonder if they will openly reverse this recommendation?

  New light, huh?

  But as I remember to have read lately in another threat, about 80% of the kids get lost while in adolescence. So it's questionable if such "new light" wouldn't shrink the org even more!
• 

  holly

  if id known how hard teenage kids can be, i wouldnt have had them in any system !
• 

  lonelysheep

  if id known how hard teenage kids can be, i wouldnt have had them in any system !

  Lol!! That's what I'm scared of!
• 

  Gill

  Tell me about it! (Teenage kids, that is!) You really wonder why you had them when they come in at one in the morning and throw up all over your hall carpet, dining room floor and walls, stair hand rails, stair carpet, toilet, toilet floor , toilet wall and light fittings, and apparantly that's after, 'I only had two drinks!" Yeah! And I'm Darth Vader. Then the other one comes home an hour later and wants to know why your shampooing your carpets at two in the morning! Have you both go dementia, mum and dad?

  I said, 'Any of your vomit on MY house again, and You're OUT!!!!!!!!!'

  I'm sure I wasn't that bad when I was young!

  Then the little Git, texts his girl friend looking for sympathy and says that his mother has thrown him out of the house and not allowed him back in till seven in the morning!

  Not that she, meaning me, made sure he got in the shower allright, into bed and made sure he was still alive during the night.

  If there wasn't a law against murder.....sometimes !!!!!!

  You gotta love 'em.....little swine!!,
• 

  upside/down

  "Now I know why tigers eat their young"- Rodney Dangerfield/ Caddyshack