by vitty 22 Replies latest jw friends
Unfortunately after you go a couple of times you may just get a lot of questions, what congregation are you from, do you have your publisher card, did you know sister so-and-so.... worst of all, they will feel obligated to call on you.
Tough fabrication to sustain. Good luck!
Sherry
Ive just had a horrible thought
What if they decide to give a "encouraging" visit that week!!
This is a nightmare
i would most definatly recomend telling the truth but i know sometimes thats to risky because you have to much to lose like family members hating you and such.
but better to have then be mad at you for that then that and lying to them about it.
if you dont want to lie to them then have an emergancy trip you had to go on and cancel the visit maily because you sound like this is really stressing you out and i am picturing a chevy chase movie of sorts happening like national lampoons visits from the c\o week
what ever you do good luck
Hi Vitvin!
As I see it, you either want to be a JW or your don't. If you carry on down this road,of trying to deceive your former friends, that road lies insanity. No one can keep up that kind of lying. I'm sitting here pulling my hair out at all the ramifications and scenarios that can arise that will give you away.
If you hang out with JWs they'll still expect you to be JWs. If you want to keep up your fade you'll have to cancel your visits. Think of something! You'll be having to come up with far more lies if you keep the visit on.
Whatever you do, good luck. You're going to need it!
Sso we are going to take them to a cong outside our territory
won't work: you will be love-bombed in that other cong and your guest will know immediately.
Why not saying that you are not quite settled down .....
Or, since your guest are on a holyday - just do "other" things ?
can't you find something interesting to do all day long (the meeting is on sunday like in France i suppose) in your new area? something like a big walk for example, to show them how wonderfull it is where you live... do you live in a town or in the countryside?
well, i really want to tell you good luck!!!!
I'm gonna go with Country_Woman and a few others. I don't think visiting another cong. will work. It's too risky although fessing up will be risky as well. Yeah, I would do my best to have all time occupied by other things.....like you think the visit is special enough to miss a couple meetings. Or perhaps you have "unexpected emergencies" that keep you from going?
With the others that want to visit, tell them you'll be out of town.
Boy...Ive been disassociated for 8 years now and my insides turned into KNOTS STILL after all these years reading about your predicament!! Ohmygod...how we all have suffered and continue to suffer at the hands of this cult! Is it any different than Nazi Germany? Do we run any faster than the Jews did to hide who we are when the knock on the door comes from a JW?
Honey unless you want to live your life...and I do mean the REST of your life...in fear, you need to made a definitive choice soon about whether you want to cut ties with this cult or not. I knew when I DAd that I would lose 13 years of friends and family, but I couldnt live for the rest of my life in denial pretending to be something I wasnt...because it was eating me ALIVE. You cannot move forward. And keeping you in this fear and loathing...it means they have won. And it proves that you cannot escape their clutches.
I say come down with a really really bad disease and CANCEL THIS VISIT!
hugs, D
((((( Vitvin ))))) That's a tough situation. 9 months away eh?
I had a similar situation, when a travelling salesmen freind arrived in town unxepectantly, and I invited him over for supper, and of course felt obligated to go to the Tuesday nighter.
However we were in the process of fading and so our attendance was spotty, but not not unexistant.
You refer to "we" so I am assuming you are a couple. Can you give us some more details if you are able. Married? How Long? Kids? How long in present cong? Is hubby the stronger "in the troof"?
Not trying to be nosy, but there is no bio to go on and I need a little more info before I offer my 2 cents.
Regards David, whose former religion sickens him
. Or perhaps you have "unexpected emergencies" that keep you from going?
THERE you go! Go on a 'daytrip' on Tuesday, and have an 'unexpected emergency' on Thursday. Do you have a friend, collegue, neighbor, or something, who can call you for 'help' an hour before the meeting? Heck, pm me your phone number and I'll do it. I'm off on Thursday nights (except for this coming Thursday). Could be fun, lol.
