Should I teach my kids about Santa Claus? (Lie vs. Harmless Fantasy)

by AlmostAtheist 62 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  MelbaToast

  When he was small, I told my son the story of Santa.

  When he was 7 or 8 he asked me if it was true... Was there really a Santa? How could he get to all the children?

  I told him, "Well, I see you are now big enough to be in on the Big Secret. There is a real Santa, but he doesn't have a red suit and live at the North Pole. The Big Secret is that all the adults are the real Santa! WE (your mom, dad, uncles, aunts, etc) get all the gifts for all the little children! It is the greatest, must fun thing to do! And now you are big enough to know the secret, and you are big enough to be Santa, too!"

  From then on, he helps pick out gifts for others...and loves writing, "From Santa!" on the cards.

  He loves being Santa!

  Lisa: Im am planning on doing the same think with my child (She will be a year old this christmas) Rightnow we ooh and ahh over the pretty lights and she screaches with delight.

  She's seen quite a few santas lately, mostly she just wants to poke his eyes out. LOL!!

  Little kids need fantasy like you need to get up every day. Pretend play makes up the greater portion of ages 2,3, and 4.

  Lett the kid have a little fun. You're only young once. Gees, the kid has its whole life to find out that Santa Claus isn't real.

  edited to say: I cant get this stupid yellow off now!
• 

  MungoBaobab

  Why is it so cute when a child believes in Santa Claus?

  It's the same reason Bambi is cute. Remember when Bambi goes out on the ice and keeps falling down? He's cute because he's so helpless. This helplessness stirs certain instincts within us; certain parental instincts. Parenting, among many other things, can be a condescending excercise ("Don't mother me!"). We feel superior to Bambi when we see him flail on the ice, and that moves us to want to help him; to parent him.

  Children who trust their parents because they have to; they're born completely ignorant and it's a parent's job to teach them. This also makes children extremely gullible, as they do not have the experience to judge for themselves whether something is true. This gullibility, this intellectual helplessness, is no different than laughing, even warmly, as Bambi falls down on the ice.

  When we think it's cute that a child believes in Santa Claus, we're really thinking, "Aww. Look how gullible and ignorant that little boy/girl is."

  If you find this line of reasoning interesting, I suggest reading Cute, Quaint, Hungry, and Romantic by Daniel Harris.
• 

  formerout

  Scully said,

  The thing about Santa Claus is that he is claimed to give things to children that they want. And JWs only want their children to believe in the fictional character "Jehovah" to give them everything they want: like Living Forever in Paradise on Earth?; like being able to have their very own pet lion or pet giraffe in the New System?, like never being sick, or having loved ones come back from the dead. And JW kids have to be impeccably good, otherwise Jehovah will kill them at Armageddon. Santa only gives out lumps of coal to the bad kids, but he doesn't kill people like Jehovah does.

  Excellent point!! The JW's teachings seem to be so positive (Paradise Earth) but the opposite is so negative that it is truly fear and guilt that keeps them loyal. It's not the love or positive influence.

  I'd rather have my children raised believing in positive fantasy than in negative reality.

  Brad
• 

  MelbaToast

  Parenting, among many other things, can be a condescending excercise ("Don't mother me!"). We feel superior to Bambi when we see him flail on the ice, and that moves us to want to help him; to parent him.
  

  I didnt know helping someone (or baby deer) was synonomys (sp?) with parenting. Interesting view point.

  If you think parenting is such a condescending exercise....have you done it? are you a parent? I don't know enough about you to make assumptions, mungo...just a friendly question.

  Instinctively, humans are much more superior to deer. Thats the truth. So as a superior being on earth, would it not be our duty to help a younger child, or a baby deer, or a bird thats fallen out of a tree? Granted, celebrating x-mas is not really helping the child....or is it? Parents have a role to teach practices to their children....and when they grow up to be big boys and girls, they make their own decisions. Everyone has a coming of age.

  If you want to include all fictional characters, why not rule out the cookie monster, or bert and ernie? Why? Because your child might grow up and find that the cookie monster isnt real?

  That would just be traumatic.

  By the way, naievetity is not ignorance and I don't consider my small child guillible; just innocent and wonderful.

  I was the child in kindergarten that made many children cry because Santa wasnt real. Maybe I have some repressed guilt about bursting all their holiday bubbles.

  Whats really sad is that I was so brainwashed by age 5 I rattled this stuff off at the mouth. Even sadder is that my parents were so proud of their little 5 year old that said "Christmas is all a lie."

  Something to think about.

  Melba of the "cookie monster isnt real?" class
• 

  MungoBaobab

  Melba, I said parenting CAN be a condescending excercise, not that is "is such" a condescending excercise. And no, I have not done it, at least not to my knowledge! A parent must "assume an air of superiority" and not treat a child as an equal, and that is one dictionary definition of "condescend."

  REAL baby deer are nowhere near as helpless as Bambi. The exagerrated helplessness of Bambi is what makes him cute, because it instills in us an exagerrated sense of, in this case, physical superiority. Actually, I'd argue that in terms of stamina and agility, deer are far superior to humans. Watching Bambi stumble on the ice is, at its core, sadistic. My sister learned to duplicate this by placing tape on the feet of our kitten so he would slip on our kitchen floor. She thought it would look cute.

  Convincing children a preposterous story like Santa Claus is fact exagerrates their mental helplessness, like placing tape on the feet of a kitten to make him slip. The slip, in the case of children believing in Santa, is mental. It's sadistic. I agree that as "superior creatures" it is our duty to help children, is teaching them a lie and laughing at them for believeing us accomplishing that?

  You mentioned a few muppets. Consider Elmo and Barney. Both are childlike, both teach how to be good people. Why is Elmo loved and Barney despised? Because Elmo is small, like a child, and therefore helpless. Barney is, in fact, larger than even adults, and this creates a sort of inherent dilemma of a giant child that cannot be controlled, something that annoys everybody. Like the expression, "Quit being such a big baby!" I should hope that parents do teach their children that Cookie Monster & company are just puppets. I'm not sure what you mean by "ruling them out." There's a difference between suspending your disbelief for a television show and believing it is real.

  "I was the child in kindergarten that made many children cry because Santa wasnt real. Maybe I have some repressed guilt about bursting all their holiday bubbles."

  Another interesting dilemma. Surely "apostate" sites like this burst many people's religious bubbles. Isn't truth more important than comfortable delusion? You should give yourself more credit than to call yourself "brainwashed" for telling your peers in gradeschool that they were being fooled. Wasn't it your classmates who were brainwashed?
• 

  googlemagoogle

  children simply want to learn. about everything. if people would teach their children real, intelligent things, instead of teaching them bout santa, god and paradise, this world would probably be a much better place...
• 

  Valis

  Isn't truth more important than comfortable delusion?

  when you've killed enough dreams for several lifetimes a comfortable delusion is better than a disturbing destructive one any day. Normal people know the difference in imagination and fantasy versus ruining normal things that normal people enjoy during parts of the year in the name of "truth".. Looks like some of you better go stuff your own stocking cuz ya done pissed off Santa good and plenty...*LOL*

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer
• 

  meomy

  Hello, I was not raised as a J.W. and my mom always told me their was a Santa, the elves

  would even call me on the phone. ( it was my stepdad) It was very magical for me. I loved it.

  However, when when my children were 1 and 3 I became a J.W. and did not celebrate

  anymore. It was hard but I thought I was doing the right thing. We just left 2 years ago, my

  kids were 12 & 15. It was very hard for them to capture and grasp those same magical feeling

  that I had about Christmas. My advise to you is make it fun, for your kids don't regret being to serious

  childhood is supposed to be a glorious make believe time. When your kids are in school they

  will learn the truth about Santa. However, if allowed to celebrate and believe in Santa they will always

  have the christmas feeling in their hearts.
• 

  MelbaToast

  Surely "apostate" sites like this burst many people's religious bubbles. Isn't truth more important than comfortable delusion? You should give yourself more credit than to call yourself "brainwashed" for telling your peers in gradeschool that they were being fooled. Wasn't it your classmates who were brainwashed?

  IP: Rovgm5MqWaCP8W1M Mungo...the only reason I could think of WHY I did that was that....I didn't know what else to do. My mind went into "JW" mode. I was what would be considered a "model" Child. I witnessed at school, not only to my teachers, but also to other students. But I was a loner because no one wanted to play with a person who makes them cry. I think that this incident- tarnished what relationship I had to all the other children..... Stuck out as different....was much worse than believing in a happy, loving entity for simply just one day during the end of december. Let me know when you have your first kid. You will feel totally different about many decisions you have made. BTW: how did his edit get in my copy???? My .02 MelbaToast

  03-Dec-04 02:34 Dec 3, 2004 by MungoBaobab: Correct formatting
• 

  JustTickledPink

  About harmful teachings... My friend Venessa met a JW and they had playtimes together with their kids at the playground... Anyways, the Jw's 5 year old looked at my friends baby and said "Your baby is sooo pretty, but she's going to die at Armeggedon if you don't listen to Jehovah"

  Venessa was pretty much SHOCKED that a 5 years old would tell her that her baby was going to die. How HORRID, now that is sick. Lying to a child about other children dying.