So is there a new stance on B-days or what? Someone please explain........

by WingCommander 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • WingCommander

    Greetings All!!

    I have heard rumors on here and other places that JW's are now allowing birthdays to be observed/celebrated. Is this true? I hope so. I never saw anything wrong with them, and missed that day more than anything else growing up as a JW. I celebrated my first b-day this past summer. I am 25. I am going to allow b-days and Thanksgiving to be observed by my son. I never missed other secular holidays at all to be honest.....just alot of BS "holiday cheer" that ended the day after, and the unnecessary spending of money. I give gifts through the year. Even my wife (a non-JW) envies me for that, and is quite honestly fed up with every month being another holiday. (it's all BS made up to con people)

    So someone give me the full story, are B-days now allowed? Considered ok? Or just a "matter of conscience" for each to decide upon?

    Thanks in advance,

    Wing Commander

  • blondie

    Officially, BDs are not okay according to the WTS. I understand it is officially not a DFing offense but that doesn't stop some elders. Of course, that doesn't stop some JWs from having a "special day" where a cake is made and gifts given but it is usually 6 months away from the "real" day.


  • Happy Guy :)
    Happy Guy :)

    So someone give me the full story, are B-days now allowed? Considered ok? Or just a "matter of conscience" for each to decide upon?

    Birthdays allowed? Hold on a second while I clean myself (laughed so hard I pissed my pants).

    Celebrating a birthday would cause a JW to be bannished from eternal paradise and struck down without mercy by God at Armageddon. While they wait for that to happen they would be disfellowshipped and shunned. Now you tell me that the policy has changed from what has been occuring for the last hundred years? ....sorry....laughing again.

    I don't know the answer to your question. Someone else here might. I guess anything is possible with the JWs and their leadership at the Watchtower. I mean, if they can tell you JWs for decades that the generation who were alive and witnessed the events of 1914 will also witness Armageddon, and, now that this generation has passed without Armageddon occuring, can tell you JWs that Armageddon really happened but it's just invisible.......well I guess they can change anything they want, any time they want, and do whatever they want regardless of how inconsistant it is. The donations will just keep rolling in.

    BTW I just love decorating my Christmas tree and getting the house all lit up and pretty with the white snow as backdrop at Christmas time. It only happens once a year. Such a beautiful time of the year for family and friends for those who enjoy it.

  • Billygoat

    I've wondered the same thing. A couple years ago I was talking to my mother on the phone. She was telling me how her and dad were taking my twin brothers out for a drink on their 21st birthday. I said, "You're celebrating birthdays now?" I was truly shocked. She said, "No, no, no! Of course not. We just want to take them out for their first drink in a controlled environment." Yeah right. I said, "Come on mom. Everybody drinks before they turn 21. All of us did it. Do you honestly think this will be their first drink ever?" Paused silence. "Well, I should think so. They aren't legal until this Friday." I imagine her covering her ears with her hands, closing her eyes, and going "Lalalalalalalalala".


    As much as I love my step-mom, she has her head so far into the sand, it's just not even funny.

  • gumby

    There was an article not too long back about how christians need not worry about the origin of something that has no relevence today.....I don't remember where it was. Many took this as a green light that birthdays were ok, but it seems the article hinted that those celebrations "directly" mentioned in the bible were not ok.

    Imagine the confusion to school teachers if birthdays were allowed......"little Tommy couldn't stay in the classroom and eat cake with the kids last year.....but this year he can"

    Birthdays are not allowed as far as I just do it quietly.


  • Midget-Sasquatch

    Whenever the WTS tries to be (IMHO feigns to be) undogmatic in their publications, its just a tactic to counter the criticisms they receive. Be it a court, or a government agency, can point to the ambiguous writings in the literature and argue that the WTS isn't such a controlling/oppressive cult etc....Meanwhile, all the unwritten content, and the social controls still stand and go by whatever the current view is...which as far as I know is still viewed as a no-no...I wouldn't be surprised though if a dub parent who's in a tough custody battle would be overlooked by an elder body and not reproved if she gave her children birthday parties that year.

  • Happy Guy :)
    Happy Guy :)

    Imagine the confusion to school teachers if birthdays were allowed......"little Tommy couldn't stay in the classroom and eat cake with the kids last year.....but this year he can"

    Imagine the confusion for little Tommy.

    and Sasquatch: Good post your dead on including the last comment...I personally experienced the scenerio you painted when I went through that a little over a decade ago. It was done to act as a "we are normal and celebrate b-days to" measure in court and it was sanctioned by the HQ lawyers in Canada who represented her just because it would be a good legal counter-point.

  • XQsThaiPoes

    Ill tell you the truth.

    Yes and No.

    Yes they said (this july) that birthdays and x-mas and other holidays were okay if they did not have pagan rituals connected with them in your neck of the woods (I guess that depends on your view of pagan). That noted JWs in my area have did memorial day, 4th of july (going to fire works shows), thanks giving, and B-days sans fan fair and decorations for a while. Graduations oddly are celebrated like birthdays and can get quite wild. Baptisms were celebrated in simular fashion until the CO threw the book are us. I guess it is the decorations that must be pagan. In an odd twist worldly people are abandoning holloween.

    Officially I believe it is for the jw's concience to decide as long as it does not stumble anyone in the area (including wordly people). Since stumbling people can get you DFed it is more about does anyone know about it or object to it where you live.

    Thats the real truth people celebrate what they can get away with. Usually with out decoratioons so they don't have to destroy incriminating evidence. Reminds me of the stories of bookstudys in banned lands. Where they would put up decorations so if they got caught they would say it was a birthday.

  • amac

    I don't think there is a new someone mentioned a few months back there was an article that basically said if something no longer had pagan connections it is OK. It's main example was the use of Pinatas and how that is OK nowadays. The article then went on to specifically mention B-Days as things to avoid, so as usual it was quite contradictory.

    We were "reported" for letting our kids go to a b-day party, the funny thing is, when the elders met with us, they barely mentioned it. They were more interested in our service time and meeting attendance.

  • XQsThaiPoes

    Amac there was a QFR that said it was a conscience issue if there is no modern pagan connections. The thing is the QFR fromover 10 years ago was different and totally ruled out any personal choice. So there has been a change. How much of a change in the day to day lives of JW is hard to gauge.

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