I took on more secular work because it dawned on me that I had no retirement plan and I was 52 at the time, this "System of Things", wasn't supposed to last this long. For the first time in my life, I was afraid of the future.
A year ago, my parents used the line on me: "If armageddon comes this year, do you think you will be ready?"
I gave an okay answer. But after some thought, I wish I would have responded, "If it's coming this year, bring it on. I'm ready to state my case to god. What I'm not ready for is this system lasting another 20 or 30 years. I've frittered away most of my life because ever since I was a child, I thought it was coming in the next year or two. But now I'm pushing 50. 50! In 20 years I'll be past retirement age, and I'll have nothing to live on."
"The BOE would like to see 100%"! I was so embarrassed, because the wife and I were part of the 12 that didn't sign up. Further more, after the meeting, each Elder an application in their hand and approached those who had not signed up.
After I'd left bethel, was still an elder, but not a pioneer, there was one of those months when all the elders except me aux. piod. It happened to come up at one point that one of those elders made it a point to say that all except one of the elders was able to aux. pioneer. I responded with, "I was a pioneer and served at bethel for a total of over 15 years. That's a long time in the full-time and special full-time service. Good for you guys that you aux pioneered. I did that back when I was a teenager. Try reg pioneering and bethel service, then come back and talk." At that point, I wasn't embarrassed, because I didn't care anymore. I was here learning TTATT and was trying to figure out how to get out.
The next meeting I was called to the back room with 2 Elders and counseled never to question an Elder in front of others.
Toward the end, it was easy for me to avoid the elders because they were avoiding me. Here's why:
They couldn't give me the usual verbal beatings since I'd tell everyone everything that happened.