Hey Travis, I guess I don't really understand. It sounds like it's out of your control entirely? If you had been home, would you have had any say in this? In any case, it's irritating to have something done behind your back; evidently they knew you'd be displeased. Now make like a duck and enjoy your vacation.
grrrrrrr...I am about to lose it..Re: My Parents
by Valis 31 Replies latest jw friends
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MegaDude
I have missed my younger JW brother for a long time. He shuns me most of the time, but a lot of the reason why is because his wife pressures him so hard to keep me out of his life because I'm DA'd. I finally let him go emotionally and it was the beginning of a lot of good healing in my life. It was a major difficulty at first as we were close and took trips together, especially scuba diving trips. The Watchtower has kept us apart for years.
Yet, as synchronicity would have it, my ex-JW friend in San Antonio called me up to tell me he would be in Cozumel last Wednesday and he wanted to scuba dive with me. At the same time, my JW brother was going to be Cozumel. I figured what the hell. I called up my JW brother and said I was going to be there the same time he was and let's go diving like we did in "the old days." To my surprise he said okay! I even stayed at the same hotel he did, despite his upset wife's surprise. We ended up having a great time and snorkled and scuba'd every day I was there. And he was down there with another JW family! He even took a trip with me to the mainland where we dove the underground caverns.
Now we're back in Texas. I'm not waiting for him to resume the relationship, nor am I expecting a call. It doesn't bother me much that I don't expect him to. I know he is under tremendous pressure at home and at the Hall to keep me out of his life. Maybe that sounds a bit crazy that I'm not upset. I realize that's the price of freedom. I'm not stuck in some hellhole controlling cult like he is.
1. Let controlling JW relatives go. Having them in your life is a bad thing.
2. Build a good life without them
3. You will build emotional strength and be happier. Hurts at first. Then the hurt begins to heal in a major way. You realize as time goes on that cutting them off was the best thing for you and you wonder why you didn't do it sooner
4. If appropriate, reach out occasionally to them and test the waters. Perhaps they will soften and you can build on that, but only if you feel it is a good thing for you
Enjoy your trip, Valis. When you paint your face blue, scream out a big "FREEDOM" for me!
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neverthere
Sorry to hear about it.
(((((Valis)))))))
Diana
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calamityjane
Sorry to hear that Travis. My parents have done the same to me, and it hurts like hell. I know exactly how you feel and the anger that you feel. Ya feel like you could spit bullets.
Take care
cj
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simplesally
Valis,
So sorry this has happened to you, but it sounds like you are putting off dealing with your parents until you get home. I think that is a good plan. All you will do if you get upset with them now, is to let them talk about you behind your back, in front of your kids and commisserating with the ex. It's not worth it. Play it cool then decide what you'll do.
I also agree with the poster who said you probably should not leave your kids with people who disrespect your decisions.
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Valis
so it has arrived, i.e. they have arrived and have a whole weekend to look forward to w/my parents. I spent the better part of six hours there today, small talk and listening to my mother explain to S about how well my sister was doing in the KM during a demonstration and how it got all these other bothers and sisters to start interacting with her. I got the feeling that they hadn't before because she has Down's Syndrome. Lot of love there is seems...*trying my best to keep my cool and not say what I really want to*...and like Ross said recently, one starts to feel like a walking wallet.
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
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seeitallclearlynow
Thanks for the update Valis - interacting with "those on the inside" rarely changes for most of us, I expect...hopefully it will be a peaceful weekend for you all.
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SheilaM
Valis:Sorry hun...Did Thunder tell you his yougest brother has Downs???
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xenawarrior
((((((((Travis)))))))) breathe in, breathe out,
At least you are able to spend some time with those beautiful girls of yours !!
Look on the bright side- now that you have been over "thurr" you can take a breath and count to 10 in several different languages !!
XW
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bem
Valis, Parents can try us to the limit...Hope your visit with your children is an enjoyable one.
BEM