DATING OLDER MEN/WOMEN

by sandy 48 Replies latest social relationships

  • Yerusalyim
    Yerusalyim

    Age difference is relative. My wife is 6 years older. One issue to consider...at age 70, will you have the energy to care for a 86 year old?

  • FirstInLine
    FirstInLine

    When I was 20 I went after a heavily pursued 39 year old and managed to have my way. It was alot of fun. I think because she was so young looking and extremely beautiful it worked.

    Now days I think I would rather date a girl a couple years younger than me even if she wasnt as good looking. And I dont mean to sound as though looks are all that important either. To me age is much more important than it was in the past. I really wouldnt want to date a woman that was more than a year older than me much less 19 years like I did before. I love 22 year olds. I just hope next year I like 23 year olds as much. (smiley emoticon)

    I dont look down on people that dont want to have kids (at least not women). But I do feel sorry for them. I am not a parent but to me the most rewarding thing in the world in my mind is having and raising a son or daughter.

  • Satans little helper
    Satans little helper

    it's a number, nothing more. I dated a woman 16 years older than me for a while and it wass great, I'd never let age get in the way.

  • Sassy
    Sassy

    Hi Sandy.. do what makes you happy. Age doesn't have to be a factor and Phooey on anyone who tells you it is..

    Age is the least of what makes us who we are.. I know 50 yr old men who are less mature than some 19 yr olds I know.. What matters is how we connect, how our maturity level matches the one we date..

    If you are connecting.. if you are growing deeper in your feelings for this man.. ENJOY!!!

    Sassy....
    of the class that generally dates YOUNGER men...

  • DevonMcBride
    DevonMcBride

    One of my clients is 32 years younger than his wife.

    Devon

  • xjw_b12
    xjw_b12

    FIL

    I am not a parent but to me the most rewarding thing in the world in my mind is having and raising a son or daughter.

    Where can I send them?

  • DevonMcBride
    DevonMcBride
    It really makes me angry when people try to make others feel guilty or sub-human when they state they dont want to have kids....

    I hate it too. It takes a well-rounded person to admit they don't want the responsibility of having kids. There are too many irresponsible parents who have children because society dictates it to them.

    Devon

  • bebu
    bebu

    For someone significantly older, I have heard that carbon dating is fairly reliable.

    bebu

  • Sara Annie
    Sara Annie

    Is a large age difference an issue in a relationship? Of course it is. It's not insurmountable, however. You just have to recognize it and deal with it honestly.

    My husband is just shy of 10 years older than I am, and while I agree that the attitude that "age is just a number" can be thrown about in deference to the heart being blind to such matters, there are certain considerations one has to make with even a 10 year age difference in a relationship.

    On a daily basis, it's a non-issue (aside from the good natured ribbing that is abundant at our house--"Honey, when you graduated from high school, I was in third grade!" or "The year you lost your virginity, I was six years old!"). I fell in love with him, it would have mattered very little to me how old he was. I suppose that it matters when you meet someone, as well. There's a period of in most of our lives where age means much less than it does when we're very young or getting 'old'. I was 23, he was 32. At that point in our lives we were pretty much peers. It would have been a different (and creepy!) story had we met when I was 15 and he was going on 25.

    That is not to say, however, that any significant age difference doesn't require a little serious forethought. Planning for a synchronized retirement makes for some pretty creative fiscal management and investment strategies. Planning our family took a some consideration about the future. We have two children and have decided not to have any more (though we both wouldn't mind having another) with our age difference as a major factor in the decision. And even our 10 year spread makes for some fear about living out our golden years together. Fortunately, my husband has promised that he will outlive me, and insists that I'm lucky to have found him because a younger man could never handle me...

  • sandy
    sandy

    Wow! Many of you have given me a lot to consider. I have two hearts to think about in this situation not only my own. As I said before, I care for this guy a great deal and I never want to do anything to hurt him.

    Right now it is almost as if we have our hearts on hold, if that is even possible. If we break it off now it will save a whole lot of pain later.

    I guess I am getting carried away here anyways. To be perfectly honest him and I haven't even discussed the possibility of a serious relationship. From some of the things he has said to me though, I know he is playing with the idea in his head just as I am.

    I guess my fifteen year old mind is showing here. I'm reading into things perhaps, too deeply.

    I want to bring the subject up to him soon but maybe at this point it is too soon or not a good idea at all.

    Thanks for the therapy session everyone!!!!

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