My website

by shera 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • shera
    shera

    Very sad,my boy was very agressive at time.No excuse to hurt any child like that......

    There is time I have to restrain him from hurting another and it doesn't look too purdy when I have to do this,but I would never hurt my boy.

  • seeitallclearlynow
    seeitallclearlynow

    You have a very nice website over there Shera! I registered and posted; looking forward to interacting with the folks there.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    We obtained custody of our now 15 year-old grandson with Asperger's Syndrome. He came to us when he was five months old and a handful. Our single-mom daughter couldn't control him and he screeched all the time, she lived out-of-state and was putting him up for adoption out of pure frustration.

    After we got him, we ended up going through 11 different doctors and a battery of tests to determine his disability and try and find a diagnosis. When he was 3 1/2 we finally got a diagnosis and a doctor that put him on meds to calm him down and help him focus.

    He spoke one word at 18 months, and never said another thing until he was well over four years old. We learned basic ASL (American Sign Language) to teach him how to "tell" us when he was thirsty, hungry, etc but when he DID begin to speak, he picked it up very quickly.

    I ended up inadvertantly getting involved in the child advocacy workshops and training classes right from the beginning, focusing on Autistic behavior and trying desperately to educate the inclusion teachers about the various stages or levels of Autism and what to expect from children from one end of the spectrum to the other...

    It's been an extremely irritating road because the "educaters" think they have a handle on everything although most of the time they don't have a clue about the REAL workings of the mind of Autism and I have spent MANY hours in offices, waiting to speak to the "administration" to beg them to read up on the aspects of Autism that their students are experiencing and exhibiting.

    For example, his 2nd grade teacher took the class to the Zoo and then to McDonald's (all by bus from the school to Syracuse, about 40 miles one-way) and at lunch they called me to come and GET him (that 40 miles from here) because he was "acting out" and under the table. Anyone trying to get to him was bitten and THEY couldn't figure out WHY he was over-stimulated and out of control!! (DUHHH!) And my "friendly-relations" and patience with the school department went right down hill from there.

    We spent more doggone time running back andforth to the school to get hin because he was acting up, and these peope went to COLLEGE to learn how to DEAL with these kids, but would call US at the drop of a hat because THEY didn't have the skills to take care ofbusiness!

    I had just signed up for several workshops and various seminars from Rochester to Syracuse until I had a stroke in August that left me paralyzed for several months and I still can't speak very well, which certainly puts me at quite a disadvantage when I want to go into these offices on a semi-professional basis (through experience) and get their attention long enough to make a point!

    I just can't believe the misunderstandings and misinformation that these "Special Ed" teachers are accepting as "fact", and the discipline administered under the guise of "acting out" when the kids are ACTING like Autistic kids DO!

    More people HAVE to get involved and advocate for their children and help them to have a more level "playing ground" from which to develop and grow from. The way things stand around here, anyways, is pitiful and most unfair. My grandson as been picked on, beaten up, ostracized and belittled for years but the school board has little tolerance OR understanding of the Autistic mind. The mainstream classes and the inclusion can cause far more damage than Special Ed classes in so many cases. It depends on the individual and you cannot pigeonhole them and expect them to act and react as typical kids do.(Guess you can see how this subject STILL gets me all fired up, huh?)

    So, best of luck with your website, and I'll "drop in" and say hello, maybe tomorrow. Because of MY involvement with the Autistic Community, I can't think of a more worthy "cause" for you to undertake!

    hugs,

    Annie

  • shera
    shera

    Thanks Annie.

    bttt

  • Stefanie
    Stefanie

    My mom trys to keep his ritalin in check, but because my sister is such a stupid biotch there is always something wrong. I will never forget the first i saw him have a fit at the store. He threw himself on the ground and started to pound his head, people just gave the dirtiest looks. I told her maybe we need to wear a f*cking sign.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    # I will never forget the first i saw him have a fit at the store. He threw himself on the ground and started to pound his head, people just gave the dirtiest looks. I told her maybe we need to wear a f*cking sign.#

    Hi Stefanie,

    It IS rather frightening and alarming to watch, and very frustrating for the caregiver, isn't it? I've felt like carrying a sign myself at times, because of the "looks" that people aren't always shy about making.

    Our G'son after he began to speak---then didn't know when to put a sock in it, and argued about everything there COULD be TO make a fuss about. Even at the KH, I'd have to drag him out of the main hall andstand by the restrooms with him all the time, trying to calm him down and soothe the ruffled feathers, and I remember a sister (no children) GASPING and staring while standing two feet away from us---because I had told him to stand still and HE had said a loud NO! and that he didn't have to do do ANYTHING I told him ya-da-ya-da. I spent more doggone time in the restroom area than I did IN the KH seats, and for a while (since NOBODY else could control him) I stopped even going to the meetings.

    When I was asked why I wasn't "at the meetings" I told'em JUST why not, and the brothers" DID make an effort to give me a hand with him, but he was SUCH a loud, strong, and belligerant kid, it was an effort in futility at best! I'm SURE that people often thought that I was a lax "mother" to him, letting him "get away with murder" but there was NO way to stop his temper tantrums OR his firestorm attitude--but I had to learn to let the remarks and the rolling eyes drip off my back. It was so hard.

    I totally understand how YOU felt, trying to deal with this part of a Autistic child...

    hugs

    Annie

  • Special K
    Special K

    Hi Shera..

    What a nice website. I especially liked the colouring of the site.. Very easy on the eyes.. relaxing baby blue on my screen.

    Good luck with this much needed site.

    There is an autistic boy who lives only a few houses from me.. He is 14 now. some years ago now his mom brought a letter around to all her neighbours explaining that her son had autism. It explained all about it and also the way that it was affecting her son.

    We (all the neighbours).. watch out over him when he is out and about to make sure he is safe as he drives his bike and just whenever he is around.. It's like a neighbourhood watch especially for him.

    great job Shera.. I'll pass along your site to his mom.

    sincerely

    Special K

  • Stefanie
    Stefanie

    Annie you have a PM

    I remember a sister (no children) GASPING and staring while standing two feet away from us---

    I am sorry but those kind of sisters suck! I remember when my daughter was a baby she would cry sometimes because she was tired and this one older sister with no kids would sigh and roll her fricken eyes. She would watch me walk down the whole godamn isle and because my ex was an elder prick he wanted to sit up front so the whole ass congregation knew my troubles caring for the baby.

  • shera
    shera
    My mom trys to keep his ritalin in check, but because my sister is such a stupid biotch there is always something wrong. I will never forget the first i saw him have a fit at the store. He threw himself on the ground and started to pound his head, people just gave the dirtiest looks. I told her maybe we need to wear a f*cking sign.

    I recall having my son on a form of ritalin,and it made him worse and have the hugest fits.Wasn't long before I took him off that.Mabey she should ask for a medication for agression.My son does much better on that.

    Autism is very hard to deal with.I know there is times,I cry.Thats all I can do,but it passes and I go on.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    # Autism is very hard to deal with.I know there is times,I cry.#

    Ain't THAT the truth! Even last summer when our G'son was on vacation and before I ended up the hospital, I'd try to get yard work done or be otherwise occupied TRYING to keep an eye on him, and he'd be racing from one place to another and I'd be hollering his name so he'd come back to where I was....and 90% of the time he'd ignore me and keep going. I'd have to stop whatever I was doing and hunt for him and coax him to come back to where I was trying to accomplish something....

    This would just go on indefinetly until *I* wore out and gave out and went inside. (This is what he wanted all along, so he could glue himself to Nickleodeon or the PBS kiddy-shows....and I always just ended up crying in frustration.

    It's not just the "Autism" itself that makes one feel so defeated most of the time, it's the problems and situations associated with it and how to deal with them and still keep your sanity!

    I STILL haven't gotten over to visit your website---too much going on here this morning, but I WILL ASAP!

    Hugs,

    Annie

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