Drugs. Bless my stars. Yes, I was led back to Jehovah because of drugs. I was a homeless tweek for about 6 mos (which is not that long, really when I look at other tweeks). I prayed fervantly to Jehovah to help me out of the situation I was in, his blessing to me was an unplanned pregnancy. I distinctly remember... I had been up for about 2 weeks, no sleep, I had eaten maybe 3 times in 2 weeks; spun out of my mind, I was alreays reading cards or casting charts or something.
This morning, I had been up all night working with dominos and dice, trying to devise a divination method... I did. I had an overwhelming feeling like I was going to or had conceived. Well, when I started putting all my toys away, my boyfriend at the time (current ex-husband) woke up and chopped us each a couple of lines.
I snorted one line and ran to the toilet to puke. Right then I said "I think I'm pregnant". He said, Naw, your just high, have another line. I said "no, I'm pregnant, so I'm not goin to do any more dope until it's confirmed" Geez, talk about hard. I was staying in this flop house with about 10 other tweeks... I just made them hold my hand when they were doing lines and I couldn't.
Two weeks later I asked for a pregnancy test. They didn't want to give me one because It wasn't even time for my period, much less the fact that I wasn't late! But I convinced them to do one and sure enough it was positive. So, we moved away from our tweek lifestyle and set up family (I already had a son that was living back and forth between my mom and his dad).
10 mos after my daughter was born, we moved back to our old tweek town and guess what happened. I was somewhat moderate, I wouldn't allow myself to go more than 24 hours with sleeping, but my husband went off the deep end again. I did some serious consideratons and made my dedication in prayer to Jehovah. I was re-instated inside of 2 mos.
Now I don't like meth any more. It's bad stuff; but I still love weed, shrooms, and I would really like to try peote, I guess I'd better learn to spell it first.
So at the time, getting re-instated was my way of controlling my little run-away demon; my husband quit using it then too, although he's gone back to it recreationally since. But currently, I'm w/ Saintsatan on the use of other, more organic mind expanding sustances... I love to smoke weed and meditate of do yoga or read or go for a walk or have tantric sex. I think some of the substances that Jah gave us have a purpose. Marijuana, the poppy plant, the coca bean, etc.