I was standing outside in the KH parking lot, stand near the truck of my car, having a long, difficult conversation with one of my closest friends...I think it was right around the Memorial..it may have been right after THE Memorial...it was 1998. I was telling my friend, that I didn't know if I could step back in the KH ever again, that I just didn't agree...it had come over me so suddenly after the meeting...things that had been brewing subconsciously for years....the way women were second class citizens, how we did no work to benefit those that were not witnesses, the shunning...
After that I got online, and started asking questions of people in various chat rooms about spirituality in general....but only for a few months, just cursory stuff. Then, after I got together with my now husband (whom I met online...never would have met him if I had not dared to go online hahah), I was reading a book that he had, called Job A Comedy of Justice by Robert Heinlein,...it made me soooo angry...it was a good book, and it made me so pissed off at the same time. It stirred in me thinking I had never really thought about before.
I didn't think about it too much for about a year or two.after that....then when I was very pregnant, I saw a tv report on two girls that had been molested by a JW and was SHOCKED...not because that it happened...that happens in every religion, but it was the first time that I had heard about the society getting sued over it...so I went online to look more up...and ended up on this site.
This is where I found out about CoC. I good read.
I have not gone to a meeting since that night. I have been in the parking lot of a KH or two over the years,.to drop my mom off or pick her up...I even went into the entrance of my old hall to get her once...shudder!
All I can say, that experience, although I feel I have a better life now, it was like a divorce. But I don't regret being a witness...it was something I was raised in, rebelled in, then came back and 'made it my own" for several years. I was a true believer when baptised, and ready to go when I did. No one lead me to get baptised, and no one asked me to leave...it was on my own terms. It is part of who I am.