Best way to deal with anger at the GB while waking up?

by CovertsadJW 20 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • CovertsadJW

    Good morning everyone ,

    I am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the GB when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing . I have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days. I am almost fixated on reading and watching Videos on the GB, false prophecies , etc . II know everyone’s personal battles are different, I think I am fairly tough emotionally - but I feel like I have been run over by a truck - and have mixed feelings of sadness, anger , almost a hatred . Is this proportionate with others experiences ? I have never experienced anything like this emotionally before in my entire life.

    Thank you

  • scratchme1010

    Hello. Sorry that you're going through all that. I wouldn't recommend the way I dealt with it a I became really nasty with them and did a few immature, petty things.

    However, the thing I feel I did wrong way back when was concentrating in making my point to them. That's a waste of time. Take care of yourself first (or only). Later I found that the most difficult thing was to forgive myself for allowing so many JW idiots interfere in my life.

    Also, please identify the exact root of your anger. It's not the same for everyone. Some feel misled, some feel disappointed, some feel betrayed, some feel abuse, some feel lied to. To me it was more about the way I was treated in the name or their stupid Jehovah, to others is feeling that they were misled to believe something that is not true and had them made important decisions based on their nonsense.

    Most importantly, deal with anger in healthy ways, no heavy drinking, no abusing food, drugs, partying. Exercise, have a punching bag in your house, a squeeze ball, etc.

    Regardless of what healthy way of dealing with it you choose, make sure that it's a self-loving, self-forgiving and healthy way. Don't take it on something or someone else.

  • CovertsadJW

    I thinks it’s a combination of deceit , lies , wasted time. I also feel that it’s so much about 80%-90% of the fact that once realized that’s pain enough. In a normal club , faith of the non-cult type I could just walk away without a second more damaging injury of loosing family , etc. I think now that I am writing about it , yes I could turn the page on that part of my life in a normal non cult faith and move on, focus on myself and positive things. That would not be too bad. It’s the waking up knowing the consequences of waking up I think - if that makes sense.

  • Giordano

    I just posted this quote from Eric Hoffer in another tread.......... I think it others part of an explanation.

    All active mass movements strive, therefore, to interpose a fact-proof screen between the faithful and the realities of the world. claiming that the ultimate and absolute truth is already embodied in their doctrine and that there is no truth nor certitude outside it. ...To rely on the evidence of senses and of reason is heresy and treason. It is startling to realize how much unbelief is necessary to make belief possible. What we know as blind faith is sustained by innumerable unbelief's.

    So yes when we realize how our faith was sustained by innumerable unbeliefs we are pissed off that we were lied to.

  • eyeuse2badub


    I second what scratchme 1010 said. You need to stay positive. Thousands of people felt exactly the way you feel right now. It's a real blow to our psyche when we realized that we were duped by a cult.

    I personally went through a horrible period of time as I backed away from the borg mainly because my family was still in. I spent over 60 years in the cult and though it took me a few years to fully recover, but once you're free, you're really free!

    It will require time, depending on how deeply you were indoctrinated, but there is real light at the end of that dark tunnel. Hang in there and continue to seek support from other here on this forum and you will recover!

    just saying!

  • OnTheWayOut

    I posted this on your other thread, but I had not seen this thread yet:

    I went to counseling. Some have suggested marriage counseling on [your other] thread. Sure, sounds great. I doubt your wife would want to go, knowing the JW forced thinking on worldly counselors. So that leaves telling her "we" are going to a marriage counselor then going without her if she refuses, or just telling her you are going to a counselor for yourself.

    And yes, I get that it is not practical financially for everyone. We don't all have the insurance or the money to go to regular counseling. My insurance did cover most of it. I also discovered later, this excellent book that will help- EXITING THE JW CULT by Bonnie Zieman.
    ( ) Whether you go to counseling or not, consider that book. There's a kindle version you can get without anyone seeing a print book in the mail.

  • Ding

    Try not to let those people dominate your life any more than they have already.

    Leave them behind and move forward.

  • flipper

    COVERTS- Hey man, what you are experiencing is totally normal. Many of us, including myself , felt really angry after exiting the JW's and when we started discovering the lies and deceit. Don't beat yourself up over it. In reality it shows you actually have a good conscience, it shows you recognize injustice when you see it and that you've taken responsibility within yourself in action to not support the unjust ways of the GB anymore by stopping the attending of meetings.

    I stopped attending in 2003 at age 44 and I was a born in from birth. A few years later in 2007 when I found out how screwed up the GB's child abuse policies were and how some victims and their families had been disfellowshipped for reporting child abuse to the police- my head about exploded - I was so angry ! To think that the GB had given out instructions to elders to first report child abuse to WT legal , and ONLY go to the police once instructed by WT legal - to me the jig was up- the leaders of this JW organization have no moral or ethical character whatsoever. It's all about outward appearance, saving themselves huge lawsuits, and consolidating and keeping information from rank & file JW's in the congregations. And it's about consolidating power over those same JW's.

    As others say here it gets better in time in how to deal with the anger. For me personally , it helped talking with other EX-JW's who had similar experiences like myself being emotionally and verbally abused by elders. Also I took up playing guitar and writing songs about injustices in religion and politics. Also - became proactive in telling anyone who wanted to listen about these injustices that are occurring inside the JW organization , it helped me get the " lead " out and let off steam. After being out 14 years I've gradually lost the cult mindset and see the world in a critical thinking fashion which has built my self esteem back up after the WT Society lead by the GB tried to steal it away from me all these years. You'll be successful my friend, just have to keep informing yourself about these things. It's good you are researching, it reconfirms that you are doing the right thing. Access to information is everything- because all we ever knew before was the WT Society's slanted view of things giving us tunnel vision. Keep on keeping on man. We're here for you, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • CovertsadJW

    Thanks much for the input- I am a happy guy ( I can separate the anger ) at GB and I don’t take it out on others - but i do have to be kinder to myself as we are not taught that as J-Dubs. I was born in with about 30+!family members, cousins , grandparents , etc in- so that’s a huge motivator to stay in.

    I am wondering how people have personally dealt with the anger at the GB when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing .

    I blame myself and my mother for believing in this scam and lies coming from these so-called Faithful and Discreet Slaves. I blame my uncle who started a Bible study 50 years ago with the Jehovah's Witnesses and passing it along to his sisters (one of them was my mom). I blame my uncle and mom for never doing any research on the Jehovah's Witnesses since they came from a Catholic upbringing. They never made it past 8th grade( they were born around World War II). They weren't brought up to read or write. As a matter of fact, the only reading material they ever had was Watchtower material.

    I blame myself for believing that the Governing Body were the mouthpieces for Jesus and Jehovah. They alone could interpret the bible. I was told that we needed to study all the material they provided for my salvation. I was made to believe that the Ministry School, Watchtower Study, attending conventions, personal study, and field service was to make me a better person and follower of Jesus. All it did was make me follow a group of men from New York.

    You feel better after you find out that the Governing Body have no clothes.

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