Strangest JW you ever knew stories

by rickroll 29 Replies latest jw experiences

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  rickroll

  We all know/knew people in the KH that were about nuts. Tell us your strangest stories. I will start. I can think of a few.

  One person was a woman who said she was allergic to all perfume and deodorant. She asked the elders to tell the congregation to not to use anything before coming to the hall. They said they could not do that but did say from the stage to not use excessive amounts of perfume. This was still not good enough so she sat in the second hall for meetings. She was just nuts to talk to. She obviously had mental issues.

  In one hall we had about as close to a real hillbilly as one could get. This was way up north next to Canada. This guy was strange he would stand in the back of the hall slack jawed and talk about how he was going to make a car you can carry in a suit case. He had a repair shop for autos on his land illegally. The authorities kept coming around but I think they gave up because he would just do what he would do. He turned his home/auto shop into a real junk yard. It was a real eye sore. Junk cars and trash all over the place. He heated his shop with the tires off of the junk cars. I can remember one of the sheriff dept. coming out and saying you can't burn tires, he said funny I put them in the burner and they disappear. They also gave up. They knew it was just never going to stop. The neighbors hated this guy and called him Scrounberry. It was a play on his name.

  I think one of the strangest ones was when I lived in the south Florida we had a mental institution outside of town. The idiot JWs would go there and the prison to preach. One of the Idiot JWs women even married a converted murderer in prison. But this is about the mentally retarded 45 year old woman they would pick up and bring to the KH on Sunday. Mary Carrol was her name. She would walk around the hall and say things like I have a safety pin will it keep me safe. And I need to catch me a man, and Wear yellow catch a fellow. One Sunday I get a bit over zealous on the practical joking and told her that my buddy who was on the other side of the hall really liked her. She followed him around the hall all morning. LOL
  
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  rickroll

  Another one my wife had happen was there was a family from Hungary. The old man learned to speak English by watching cartoons. No joke. He had two daughters. These were some corn fed girls. They were about 350 pounds each. And had a nasty nasty personality. There was a garage sale and the sisters brought over some clothing to sell. Among the lot was a couple of bras.

  I have no idea why they would think any one would want their size tiple F bra but they did. My wife and her best friend put them on over their shirts and took pictures. It was a funny pic and my wife's best friend had hers made into a tee shirt. The sisters found out and went ballistic. They were already nasty hateful idiots but this sent them to space. They demanded a committee be held and the tee shirt destroyed. The elders did not do any action but asked for the tee to destroy to keep the peace. My wife's friend complied.
  
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  eyeuse2badub

  Freddy Frantz has to be the weirdest dude to ever be a jw. Never knew him personally (thank goodness) but he had to be creepy to be around!

  just saying!
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  LV101

  rickroll - omigoodness that's hilarious! Thank you for your description of the girls - I'm LOLOLOLOL! Somehow I missed reading your first opening post - oh my! Can you imagine a movie about WT/JWs.

  They were always on the anti-perfume kick. I attended weekend (whatever 2-day local/yocal wastefest- conventions were called) and they really needed hygiene talks. I couldn't stand the stench (had to move to another area a bit safer and it was in the era of packing fools in!) and I don't think they owned deodorant much less bathed/showered or washed hair. The cult doesn't let them have time for hygiene. There used to be a pregnant gal who would take her shoes off inside the hall and rest/prop her filthy feet through the seat in front of her. I couldn't believe and the odor was repulsive. I always enjoyed watching them chew gum. I had never been around such hillbillies in my life. I don't think I ever received one thank-you card for a bridal or wedding gift - going away to Beth-hell life/whatever, ever! I heard a lot of doseys from JWs re/bad experiences - hard to imagine but not re/JWs and WT!

  The cult definitely is anti-manners and social skills.
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  Anders Andersen

  An anointed elderly sister in our neighboring congregation was just nuts in general, later partly because of old age.
  
  She complained to elders that some JW who visited her had stolen her soup.
  
  She went to a bank office to withdraw some money, then went ballistic when her balance wasn't what she thought it would be. She stood there in a crowded bank cussing and swearing and invoking Jehovah's name and Armageddon and her being anointed and whatnot. A total clusterfuck. The sister who accompanied her to help her out a bit died a thousand deaths, and may or may not have walked out on her.

  She also once told a man in a wheelchair that God promised him he would be able to walk and run again in Paradise. The man wasn't interested. She walked away, but not before telling him (hard to translate the exact condescension and evil wit): "Then just keep sitting there!"

  When she really went off the rails due to old age she was housed in a home for the elderly, where she happily told other (non-JW) residents they'd be DFed for celebrating their birthday or smoking.

  Another one is more like asshole-type person and less of a crazy person story.
  One day a family of 3 walked into our hall. Man, pregnant woman, young child. They were refugees from the Balkan war, housed in the refugee camp ('center for asylum seekers') in our town. They asked the elders about hospital arrangements in connection to no-blood insanity and giving birth.

  So several people in the congregation visited the family in the refugee center a few times. The women was really kind and sweet but the man was a bit odd for a JW. Sometimes he was gone for a week or two, leaving his pregnant wife and young daughter alone in the crowded refugee center.

  Then some day - when his wife was almost due - her asked my mother if he could take his wife and daughter in for a week or two. He really had to go back to Bosnia to renew his drivers license. My mother told him no, but we'll be taking care of your family in the refugee center. So my mother, my sister and I took care of them. My sister even spent a few nights in the refugee center.

  It was an odd situation. After all, who travels 1500km to go back to a war zone to renew a drivers license?

  Then we heard from people well-versed in Balkan culture that (apparently) men can't just leave their wife....unless they nake sure she's taken care of by someone. Like....my mother if she had taken the sister in our home..?

  Anyway not much later the man traveled to the Balkan again, and when he came back he was arrested with a car full of booze and cigarettes. He had been a smuggler all that time. Such a nice brotherhood :-\
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  LauraV

  Strange JW stories, oh my,where do I begin,so many !
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  silentbuddha

  An annointed pioneer who killed her jehovahs witness husband. Went to jail and came back still eating the crackers.

  Another sister who said she was annointed. She literally wore fishnets and micro minis to the memorial... ate crackers and left

  Another brother who was previously gay. Lived in the same house with his ex-lover... one was on second floor other on first. He was a MS and died in his car in front of kingdom hall.

  The weird Bethel losers... too many too mention
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  Iown Mylife

  Old southern (U.S.) sister, lived with her son. They didn't have a car, so there was always a debate going on, who was picking up Clara or who was taking Clara out in service. When we moved there to that cong, i saw a bunch of woman coordinating to dump the problem in my lap. It was not long before i saw why everyone was trying to get away from her.

  She had a huge carry-all which she took to every door, stuffed with 100 or more magazines. If the householder refused to take the offer, she started in scolding them, how they were going to hell when they died. I wanted to die of embarrassment. Back in the car, I told her several times that wasn't the way we were supposed to talk to people. She said, "Well if they don't become Jehovah's Witnesses, aren't they going to die and go to Hell?"

  Then, the way to her house was confusing. I asked her to tell me when to turn. She wouldn't say something like, It's coming up soon. No, she would wait until I was about to pass the turn, then suddenly clap her hands and yell, "TURN HERE, TURN HERE!"

  Once she was assigned to me for a talk. I didn't have time to drive to her house and rehearse, I was working a full time job. So i just prepared it for my little daughter to help me. OH MAN when we got to the hall that night, Clara came marching up to me all huffy, and said HOW do you expect me to know what to say in your talk! You never came and rehearsed with me!

  I told her she didn't need to be upset because I was having my daughter do it. She went looking for an elder and I saw her pointing at me and jawing at him. He motioned me over and asked why I didn't have Clara for the talk. I explained everything and he looked at her and said, "She's not going to need you tonight." Clara was spitting mad, and hollered at the elder, "WELL! I'VE NEVER HEARD OF THAT, AND I'VE BEEN IN THIS ORGANIZATION FOR THIRTY YEARS!"

  The elder told me that there used to be a rule that the sister had to use the helper assigned to her for the talk, but it was okay what i was doing.

  In the hall we had just been in, that stuff didn't bother the elders at all, the sisters could do whatever they wanted about all that. But that Clara, she had been intimidating everyone for years and scared everyone so they didn't want to upset her. She was one who made everyone else absolutely miserable.
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  zeb

  An older sister had longwinded (surprise surprise) sermons she would attempt to deliver to any poor householder and become upset when they closed down on her saying 'they never let me deliver my sermon.'

  One day a visiting bro was introduced to the cong and he gave her a hug.. Well this was a scandal!

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  The wt as a whole is responsible for these bizarre and rude behaviours as they insist people lock themselves away from outer society, read nothing else, do nothing else eat poorly and end up as we have seen and thereby deliver an appalling 'witness' to the society they live in.
  
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  LongHairGal

  RICKROLL:

  Thanks for your funny stories and I saw many strange people who came into the JW religion. The guy with the burning tires couldn’t get away with this where I live!! Generally speaking though, if a guy had poor hygiene the brothers would get together privately and tell him.

  I remember being totally turned off by guys with poor hygiene (new studies) and I made sure I wasn’t around them..I wasn’t there to endure anybody’s B.O. or craziness..That goes for women as well.

  As far as the JW woman who married a converted murderer: I knew of a similar story. I could never relate to the desperate women in the ‘Truth’🙄 who wanted a man so badly they would settle for this. They could have it.