Craziest Speculations You’ve heard about the end and paradise

by Addison0998 38 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Addison0998
    Addison0998

    We’ve all heard them all our life. My two biggest stupidest ones I think are, “ We can really tell the end is almost here with the way people drive on the highway.” And a girl who said she wants to hurry up and marry her boyfriend because she’s scared if the end comes before their married, she’ll Have to wait 1000 years to marry him.

    Oh and also a poor old lady saying that she hopes Jehovah wipes away the memory of her disfellowshipped sons that he will have to destroy. My god

  • Badfish
    Badfish

    "Sharks, crocodiles, lions, and wolves will all eat straw in the new system."

    Then why do they all have sharp teeth, claws, etc.?

    "The Awake says they were originally designed to help them eat tough fruits and vegetables. For example, a lion could use its claws and teeth to rip open a pineapple."

  • EverApostate
    EverApostate

    When we are out in FS in a car group, and come across a Beautiful home in a nice neighborhood, have heard sisters say that they will choose to live in that home in the new world.

    (Obviously, as per their cult thinking, the current owner of that home would have been destroyed in Armageddon. )

  • sir82
    sir82

    When we are out in FS in a car group, and come across a Beautiful home in a nice neighborhood, have heard sisters say that they will choose to live in that home in the new world.

    Never could figure out Jehovah (or Jesus or his angelic hosts) were going to kill 8 billion plus people but somehow leave every structure intact.

    Not to mention how impractical those enormous mansions will be when all the electric power plant operators, natural gas plant operators, municipal water works employees, etc. are all dead from flaming hailstone-itis. A modern home without any modern utilities would quickly become a stinking filthy cesspool.

    Also could never figure out how every last person in the "new world" is going to live on a mountainside, or on the coast, or on a mountainside on the coast. Who ends up living in Nebraska? or Paraguay? or Mongolia?

  • EverApostate
    EverApostate

    sir82, Yeah right. What about the bone chilling Arctic Poles and bone dry deserts ? May be the less Spiritual would be driven out there ?

    OR Possibly Jah would reset the whole earth to be at 21 Deg C then.

    Modern appliances working - Possibly jah would use his ancient magics to keep the turbines running by themselves and Produce enough Electricity

    Good Speculations, even while an apostate.

  • Phoebe
    Phoebe

    One sister said Jehovah will make her forget she ever had her DF children.

    Heard of sisters say they will stockpile mascara and lipstick because it won't be readily available in the paradise.

    Picking out houses they want after Armageddon.

    So many.....

  • pale.emperor
    pale.emperor

    When the American election was about to start, my brother in law told me this is it, Donald Trump is going to bring Armageddon. How many presidents have we heard that about now?

    Everybody seemed adamant that they were going to hang out with Moses or Noah in the new system. Seriously? It'd be like looking for a needle in a haystack. And what made them think Moses or Noah would want to know them anyway?

  • scratchme1010
    scratchme1010

    I know of a black Dominican JW woman who was convinced that in paradise she will be able to choose to be white and blonde.

  • sir82
    sir82

    this is it, Donald Trump is going to bring Armageddon. How many presidents have we heard that about now?

    I explicitly remember hearing it when Reagan was elected in 1980.

  • pontoon
    pontoon

    Uriah is going to want to talk David

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