Punk I don't think your a mess, I think your a kind person with a big heart.
Anyway do you remember Jilted John? ( Gordon is a Moran) he transformed himself in to John Shuttleworth, " I'm up and down like a brides nighty, I'm up then I'm down, and I don't know why"
Of course close examination of that song reveals its all about violent mood swings, and isn't a blue number at all.
More importantly you wrote a book that is helping people who are escaping from the W.T. And you proved my point we all have art INSIDE us. And I think your book is what punk music was about. It's about having the guts not the talent, to bash it down and say sneaky, unprincipled, religious/ business organisations make a great deal of money, and the individual doesn't need follow the system.
Anyway thumps up for your book on Amazon.