The Shunning truth is now out...
I have been DF'd for 9yrs as of July 31 (yay me!).
So as I have written about previously in other posts, my whole family (parents + sister) made the choice to treat me as if I do not exist, and I have accepted it. Last summer they made a blatant show of it as our family reunion, in that they would walk right by me and not say one word...prompting our extended family to question their actions. Instead of owning the real reason why they ignore me, they have used several different 'excuses' over the years...
1. She needs to get her life together
2. It is NOT the religion
3. Go ask HER why
4. Don't let her fool you that she is innocent
5. This has nothing to do with religion
I have carried around their lies and had to thwart off the questions of everyone in wondering WHAT I could have done to have my own family disown me?! YEARS!!!! But I never had proof of this DF'd policy. There was nothing I could ever show them that would make clear sense - until now. I have to thank JW's for being so stupid and desperate, and making an entire video that clearly lays out the procedure and how JW's are expected to treat DF'd ones. FINALLY!!! I have concrete proof to show that I was not lying all these years.
I sent my extended family the video with a short but sweet explanation about the real reason behind my families treatment of me. Whether they watch it or not, whether they say anything about it to me or not - doesn't matter. The fact that I was finally able to show them what I have been trying to tell them for 9yrs...and now my family cannot lie/hide behind their excuses anymore. Just like most abusers, the one thing they hate most is being exposed. Now, my folks have been. And I feel GOOD.
Let us know how they respond please.
I'm sorry your family is treating you this way. Hopefully this shunning video will hit home with people and they can finally see how dangerous the JW religion is.
Babygirl300, it is so hard to be at a function and experience firsthand family and relatives shunning you. To make it worse, they verbalize to others that it's got nothing to do with their religious beliefs. What unloving hypocrites!
I would not wish this on anyone. Yet, if you can rise above the aching pettiness of it all and find your own path in life you show that you refuse to let others' toxic beliefs shape your own life. All power to you. What we learn when we are forced to stand on our own two feet can be so empowering and strengthening!
“By this all will know that you are [OR ARE NOT] my disciples—if you have [OR DO NOT HAVE] love among yourselves.” – John 13:35
The actions of JWs show up their claims as being false and most hypocritical – and reprehensible!
I have to thank JW's for being so stupid and desperate, and making an entire video that clearly lays out the procedure and how JW's are expected to treat DF'd ones.
Quotes from Watchtower were not enough...?
My disfellowshipped sister has been treated exactly the same way as you. 'Its not about religion, we simply don't get on' 'there are things you don't know about her'...etc. yes rather than expose the craziness of the cult and themselves they shift the blame and the emphasis to the victim. Up until 2 years ago I was treating my sister in exactly the same way. Shame on me for that. I owed her a massive apolagy.
Sorry to hear about how you've been treated. Glad that the truth has been exposed to your extended family. A little bit of justice.
I love it! Awesome job to expose the wacky cult and put your immediate family on the hot seat. Make them sweat and make them squirm because at the end of the day their cultish behavior will come back to bite them in the ass.
Although I've never been in your shoes as I've never been DFd, I think I would take the position of NOT willfully accommodating their desire for me to be "obedient" to their shunning rules. If I walked up on a conversation in which they were involved, I'd refuse to just act as though I was "dead" in their presence. I'd speak up and speak right to them as well. Let them be the ones who act like a**holes in public.
When they'd snub me after I "lovingly" greeted them, I'd explain the Cult Rules to the onlookers. With a big smile, I'd say they are just like Scientologists -- they are every bit as much of a CULT! They are mind-controlled [smile]. They (nor anyone) would behave like that except that the CULT LEADERS threaten them that they MUST do so or they will be excommunicated from THE CULT [smile]. One just cannot help but pity them! [smile] They are SO gullible. [smile]
"Worldly" people know nothing about JWs because they are so unimportant in the big picture of life, that no one cares. You took a big step in educating your family and warning them about the Cult.
Can you put up a link! Would love to have that to show to family who denies they shun