by confused3426 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • confused3426

    Hello all. I am a newbie, and yes current JW. I have been dealing with a lot confusion for months now. I guess it started last year when I found myself losing my zeal, desire for spiritual things. A bit background on me. I am in my mid 30's. I was married young for 7 years to a former JW. He disassociated himself, by writing a letter. This broke my heart, and eventually our marriage was broken, we got divorced. In that time period, I lost all hope in Jehovah and got involved in an immoral lifestyle according to JW standards. I was df, and was out for about 7 years. I eventually came back, b/c I missed my family and some good friends I made. I thought I was happier serving Jehovah, years prior since I was once a pioneer, married to a servant living a so called great life. I came back thinking maybe things could be different, and I do love Jehovah so I needed to come back. I have been back now 3 years, and this past year I find myself no longer interested in meetings, esp service. I find myself not belonging anymore, since most of my old friends are still married and in the truth. I was single for a little while and hoping to meet a great brother. But as we know the lack of brothers is slim!! I started dating a wordly man and I am very happy. He has opened my eyes up to think outside of the organization. He believes in the Bible, and has pointed out things that I now see are false from what I've learned. I got even more curious and found this website, and started chatting with a former sister on a social media site. I tell my boyfriend, I am not making any major choice right now, but I need to know the truth. I'm just confused on what I thought was true bible teachings, and to be told everything I learned could be a lie is mind blowing to me!! I am sure there's many like me. I will continue to research the answers in different bible translations, and get to the bottom of what I really want. I love Jehovah and want to do what's right in his eyes, but I am just tired of man made rules, regulations. I am at that point, that I just want to live my life.

    Sorry if this is too long.

  • Sorry

    Welcome to the forum, confused3426. Oh my goodness. I feel like I'm reading about myself lol.

    The important thing is that you do your own research and draw your own conclusions (which you seem to be doing). Despite what the Watchtower says, it's not selfish to do what's best for you. Just live your life. Life's way too short to abide by man made rules created by seven men who don't even know you. Build a support system and continue doing what makes you happy.

    -Hugs, Sorry.

  • corruptgirl

    So heads up to everyone, I'm the "former sister" she's been talking to. She liked some comments I posted on Instagram when arguing with another JW about doctrine lol. So she decided to PM me and we've been talking since. As she mentions she has a christian boyfriend who also helps her see how jw doctrine doesn't coincide with the bible. She is realizing alot of things but is still researching alot of things. I believe she's definitely in the process of waking up, nevertheless it's hard because it's all she's ever known and her family are in. I know most of you can relate to this confusion, and the stuck between a rock and a hard place feeling... Please send encouraging words!

  • baker

    Watch this video and at Appx the 1.02 mark, see if the ex elder is describing you.

  • Ding


    You're among friends here.

    We can identify with the confusion you're going through.

  • Sanchy

    Hi confused3426. This is corruptgirl's husband. It's so good to see you post here! It's a great community where most have gone through exactly what your are experiencing right now.

    All I can say is: You've taken a great first step in allowing yourself to question this faith. That is the most difficult part to overcome for a member of this religion. As much as it is indeed life shattering to realize that everything you believed was not really true, its also the beginning of discovering your true self, your authentic identity, your soul, unchained from the untruth that held you back before.

    Continue researching with an unbiased heart. Question everything. Let the facts lead you to conclusion.

    Have you stopped attending meetings?

  • Crazyguy

    Welcome, I too did a bunch or research as many here have done. As you read the Bible first thing I think you'll find is jesus came for everyone and god is not exclusive to one religious sect in fact Paul even says so In 1 Corinthians. I'm no longer a bible believer but can show you plenty of scriptures that show that you that the JW religion is just one of a bunch of opinions and is no more correct or truthy then any other.

    Just one thing to remember the Bible says to pray for wisdom and check all the inspired expressions not just blindly believe so keep digging!

  • notalone

    Dearest confused, I know this can be overwhelming. Go at your own pace. Follow what is important to you. This path is different for each of us.If you don't want to deal with a specific topic set it aside until you are ready. The best advice I can give is read a Bible not produced by the org and to don't allow them to continue to influence your perception. Find out about 'grace'. This is really important for anyone following the christian path. If you are a person of faith- pray! Realize the you are not 'undeserving of kindness' but someone of profound value. Never allow anyone to tell you otherwise.I personally was really helped using Beroean Pickets, it is a great site to help untangling the scriptural twists we find our self in within the JW mindset. Keep coming to this site. Read what upbuilds you avoid what tears you down. There are many on this site who truely will be there when you hit ruff spots. As we have been told so often- taste and see.

  • Village Idiot
    Village Idiot

    Welcome, Confused3426!

    Let me recommend you getting a pdf copy of Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz. He was a former member of the Governing Body who got disfellowshipped for going out to lunch with a disassociated JW. This book will give you a jolt. It's not about doctrines but rather the character of the organization.

  • rebel8

    You really don't need to go further than to look at the Society's own words.

    You can look up these publications yourself to confirm the information is true.

    Quotes from the Society's publications

    Scans of Golden Age and other publications

    Be sure to keep in mind the Society claims to be Jehovah's only channel since ancient times. The new light doctrine is used to excuse previous inaccuracies, but to what extent would Jehovah's only true representative on Earth be so wrong?

    Wouldn't they know that germs are real, for example? Why would Jehovah specifically guide His Organization to believe they are not real?

    This will all blow your mind. Keep thinking, keep fact checking, keep going as far as you can stand. You will need to take a break now and again to wrap your head around all of the shocking things you will find out.

    You will go through a grief process as though a good friend died--shock, denial, bargaining, depression, anger and acceptance. These are normal feelings. Give yourself permission to feel them. Just try to not get stuck on any one phase too long so you can get to acceptance. :)

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