JW’s are not brain damaged, but heart damaged!

by Joyzabel 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • Phantom Stranger
    Phantom Stranger

    thanks for the welcome, Joy, and I'm sorry it's under these circumstances. My sympathies on your family's loss.

  • Angharad
    Angharad

    (((((Steve & Joy )))))

    Sorry for your loss

  • Simon
    Simon

    Sorry to hear your sad news ((((( Steve & Joy )))))

    It's a bad enough experience without the added complication of the JW belief system getting in the mix.

  • detective
    detective

    I'm sorry for your loss.

    Hard-hearted, hard-headed...

    so true.

  • Victorian sky
    Victorian sky

    Steve and Joy, I am deeply sorry for your loss and the pain your JW family is causing you. I agree with Big Tex about the heart screaming when something isn't right. When my mom was disfellowshiped, elders told me all sorts of things to get me to shun her. For those of you who don't know, one 'kind' elder told me to cut mom off like a rotten limb. Another used the example of Ezekiel, that he didn't mourn his wife's death because of his assignment for Jehovah and that my mom is dead and I should view her the same way. I was told that this wonderful woman who raised me is my enemy, bad association and my living, breathing test from Satan. This is the kind of sick mentality we are dealing with here. First they say, no spiritual fellowship with the person, then it's cut em' off, they're dead. My reply was always but I love her and they would say, don't you love Jehovah more? I thank God my relationship with my mom survived that. We're very close. If the JW involved has any heart at all, their love will not be denied by the WTS or anyone else. - V Sky

  • blondie
    blondie

    Sorry to hear about your dad, Steve, and you Joy. I think some JWs just view it as another opportunity to prove what you "missing."

    Whatever nasty they dish out, I know you will show love back.

    Blondie and Irreverent

  • tinkerbell82
    tinkerbell82
    There's a school of thought that says that the opposite of love is fear

    wasn't that patrick swayze's schtick in 'donnie darko'? ;)

    seriously, i feel really lucky...aside from a few rotten apples, most of the jw's i grew up with were very decent people. when they were forced to shun disfellowshipped members of the congregation, they seemed genuinely torn apart by it. i think for the most part their intentions were good, their philosophy is just all screwed up.

    sorry to hear of your loss, joy and just. :( hope you guys are doing okay.

  • yesidid
    yesidid

    (((((Steve and Joy)))))

    I am so sorry. This really is agony upon pain.

    yesidid

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    Thank you all for such kind words. It is hard for our neighbors to understand the depth of what shunning feels like, especially during this time of grief.

    Thank you all for being there.

    ((Big Tex))((Makena))((Nilfun))((AlanF))((Angharad))((Simon))((detective))((Blondie))((VS))((Tink))((yesidid))

    j2bf

  • jst2laws
    jst2laws

    Dear Friends, Thank you so much for your thoughtful words. I arrived home this evening and will be returning in two days for the memorial. It was nice to see so many understanding people express their sympathy. I need to clarify something. Joy has expressed the feelings conveyed to her by our experience with my family, but I must add that the negative responses came from only a portion of the total family present. My immediate relatives (mother, sisters and their husbands) have been liberal in their dealings with me. In fact, when I suggested Joy and I would not attend the memorial so the surviving family members who were uncomfortable with our presence would not be disturbed, the above relatives insisted that "we were still family and if other members were bothered, TOO BAD." While even these members could not bring themselves to sit at the hospital cafeteria and eat lunch with my daughter and myself, I have to say they are not total drones. It was more of the young relatives, the newer generation, that seemed to lack the experience and self will to do anything but ignore our existence. It hurt .. . my daughter more than myself, and she is not DF'd. It was a terrible experience for many reasons, but that we will discuss some other time. I'm tired and will try to talk more at a later time. Jst2laws

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