Slightly different approach - JW my tradition

by closed 49 Replies latest jw experiences

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  closed

  Hello everybody :) I have been visiting this forum for some time. I noticed that many can't really free from the past in the org despite many years outside of JW.

  I can appreciate it. I was awaken with a bang. I had been an elder for 20 years. And watching my fellow elders...how they dealt with sheep, applied Bible principles and orgs policies, fought for power, lied, covered sins of their pals or family members and so on. They were appalling experiences. Actually it was my last boe which makes me feel sick 😷 But..

  Sorry for long intro. I was taken down few years ago without legitimate reasons but allowed to remain a pioneer and on Rbc as there was no wrongdoing. Elders and their relatives ostracized my family. Even my children were excluded by children of an elder at school

  And yet. I chosen to stay in the org. I don't agree with many teachings. I treat them like possible options. I hate lack of transparency and freedom of speech. But JW is my tradition although I am a convert.

  I used to neglect my family duties for the org. Not any more. I did donate. Not any more. I left Uni to pioneer abroad.

  But, hey, I met some lovely people, made true ( I mean it) friends, I have superb family. So, as with any other religion / tradition I keep it. I decided to because it is easier. If there is no the truth why bother kicking against anything? Go easy, enjoy your life. These moral standards work for me. Life is short and unpredictable so...I am not going to waste it on harboring bad feelings.

  By the way, I was asked to serve as an elder again. And I said" no way"

  Love to you all.
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  TheListener

  Welcome Closed. I'm glad you posted. I agree that wasting time on harboring bad feelings is a waste. Although, there are times when I just can't help it.

  Quick question, what is the meaning behind your username?
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  stuckinarut2

  Hi and welcome!

  Interesting post and comments.

  Always remember that the only one that is allowed to decide your happiness is YOU.

  Dont give the org, or people within it any power over your life or emotions or happiness.
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  galaxie

  As the song says "ain't that a kick in the head ".."ain't that a hole in the boat " unfortunately the kick in the head might eventually hurt too much and the hole in the boat might sink you... I'd bale out to assure the preservation of your sanity!
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  closed

  Thanks for all comments.

  I do agree that it is hard to cope with deeply hurt feelings and it is sometimes too much to bear. My first year after being kicked off was horrible. My wife took it badly. I wanted to protect my kids. Local elders were like the inquisition. But friend in the org helped a lot. Theta are sane, good people there.

  We had conversations with my wife and decided to ignore idiots and blunt theologies. We decided to stick to important values. We cherish our family ( in and out JW) and friends ( mostly in). We spend our time doing what gives us pleasure. We help those in need. We try to contribute to local community by volunteering on some projects in my village.

  I have closed my doors on faces of untruths, half truths and half wits.
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  OneGenTwoGroups

  Hey closed,

  Former elder here of 14 years. 10 years an MS before that.

  I'm doing what you're doing for the last 5 years. What are you doing for commenting and field service? I can only comment with things that I agree with about twice per year at this point. And I REALLY REALLY hate being out in the ministry. I conduct no BSs, and have one RV mag route situation.
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  new boy

  I was in for 52 years. For most people it is tough to realize they have invested in a thought system that was faulty from the beginning. Many people stick with it for that reason only that's their life and were all their friends are at. They are there for the people. Of course combat soldiers with tell you the same thing. The cause isn't that important it's the guys standing next to you is why you are fighting. I like you said I would never want to be an elder after I left bethel, were I saw abuse of power on a massive scale.
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  Magnum

  Hello. Thanks for the post. I appreciate your sharing of your viewpoint. My viewpoint is subject to change, but right now I disagree.

  Life is short and unpredictable so...I am not going to waste it on harboring bad feelings.

  I actually feel that you will waste far more of your life being a JW and following the empty, time-wasting routine than any of us will by harboring bad feelings. How can you go to the meetings and sit through them? Think how much time it takes (how much you're wasting). You have to consider also the time getting dressed/undressed, the travel time, etc. You could be using that time for other things - productive and/or fun things.

  I wasted virtually my whole life as a JW, and now I'm older with no prospects of ever retiring, so the JW "tradition" is the cause of the waste of any future life I have, too.

  I have so much I want to do that I can't imagine having to do all that is required to follow the JW tradition. At first I was kind of thinking that if you don't have any other things you want to do and you have the time, then go ahead and follow the tradition, but then I quicly changed my mind. There is so much wrong in JW land. So much of it is so phony. I can't stand the CO butt-kissing, the stupid comments made when analzying pictures in the Watchtower, the smugness, the self-righteousness, the condescension. JWs think they're right and everybody else is wrong, yet they can't defend themselves and usually run from challenges. Many don't even know/understand their own doctrine. They're extremely ignorant of their own history, yet point out the flaws in the histories of other groups.

  Then there are the more serious things. JWdom is still attempting to rob lives. I can't have any part of that. It is attempting to get people's money. It is, to me, a wrong, harmful tradition. It deceived us. Consider, for example, all the misquotes and misinformation in the Creation book and the Trinity brochure. They lied to us. The org didn't care about using us, robbing our lives. It needed us to keep the big machine running. It will let children who need blood transfusions die for a doctrine it probably now knows is wrong. I just couldn't support it even passively.

  edited to add: You said you met some true friends. Try having an open discussion with them about Bible doctrine, JW history, etc.

  I also want to stress that the above is a friendly disagreement. I really want you to hang around and post some more. You have some experience with JWdom, and I'd love to have more of your input.

  I also want to add that I don't have a problem with the ones who are kind of stuck in right now for family reasons. You seem to be sort sticking around for the tradition, though. That's what I disagree with.
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  closed

  Hi OGTG.

  I know it sounds odd by I am regular in the ministry. I stress practical value of the Bible because I think its rules work. At least they do for me. So clean conscience here. Commenting can be tricky. But tonight I am going to tell briefly about archaeological findings from Jerusalem. Although I am planning to be away when we study an article encouraging children to get baptised. I don't want my son to hear overly enthusiastic answers;)
  
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  closed

  Hello Magnum.

  I like your comments because you are not aggressive and there is common sense in your opinions.

  I agree that JW takes a huge amount of time. Is it ok to say I combine it with a hobby? I learn foreign language so meetings, ministry, association are form of mental exercise because we are in foreign language group.

  I am fortune to live in a country with good-ish welfare system, so far😃

  I guess I was young enough to reorganise my life ( mid 40)..

  I do agree that many policies are bad. People get hurt in the org. But we cannot change it. And people get hurt in all other churches. Stupid teachings and inhuman behaviour are everywhere.

  But I am not saying I will not change my attitude. I may fizz away when kids are independent, who knows...