My Mothers Ultimate Rejection

by What Now? 41 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Confusedalot

    For most people their mothers are their anchors in life, the one you can always rely on to be by your side and support you. Jehovah's Witnesses deny many of us this.

    Your disappointment is shared by many of us....hugs.

  • The Fall Guy
    The Fall Guy

    I'm so sorry for your situation WHATNOW. Being eliminated from our families by the cult-indoctrinated mentality is not easy to absorb in silence. It makes you feel like screaming at them, to waken them up to the evil which they are swallowing hook, line, and sinker. Many of us here were once like that, but thankfully, "independent thinking" prevailed and we dared to look behind the curtain.

    Return evil for evil to no one, and show them exactly why they and their cult are disgusting.

    Don't imitate them - shame them by being exemplary. I wish you peace in all of this.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    - double post -

  • StephaneLaliberte

    I am very sorry to read this. It is absolutely horrible. I personally hold a high respect of my parents as they gave me everything they had when I was a kid. Perhaps you felt the same way growing up. However, now that your mother has disown you in the worst way, the only thing left for you is... you!

    There are thousands of ways to react to this and you need to be find the way that will best suit you.

    If my mother wrote that and then fell sick, I’d bring flowers to the hospital on a daily basis and write the names of other people she might know on them. I'd pay for TV (anonymously) and make sure to look out for other small expenses that could benefit her (like ice cream, etc).

    I'd do this, not because of what she is now, but for what she used to be while I was growing up for roughly 20 years. She was there, raising me up, making thousands of sacrifices. She has recently gone insane, but fact is, she used to be good.

    Unlike JWs, I do not forget the good from the past.

    Once she is gone, I'd go see my siblings and my dad, and tell them in person that I share their grief and that I was there with them, all along, sending flowers and taking care of the little things in the background.

    Regardless of if this “wins” them, it will certainly make you feel great knowing you did the best you could, fighting hate with love.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    After everything I wrote, I just realized that there are chances you won't even know until its too late that your mother fell sick and passed away.

    I guess this leaves you to grieve now, rather than later.

    At this point, I would throw a party and invite the rest of the family: Cousins, hunts, uncles, etc. And basically turn it into a "Casual Memorial" service. I mean, you need the support of as many people you love. I'd focus on what your mom used to be up until she disowned you completely two years ago.

    I know this sounds absolutely insane, but writing a will like this is also absolutely insane. Extreme situations require extreme measures.

    Sincerely sorry for your lost.

  • dubstepped

    This is disgusting but it's an example of how many JW parents view their children. We were objects to be controlled, little reflections in the pool of their narcissistic selves. Should we fail to be who they wanted us to be then they choose to throw us away like trash in favor of an ideology that saves their own ass in the grand scheme of things, calling it "loyalty to Jehovah" to deflect from the reality. So many of us have become un-persons, the shunned, and it's a tough place to be.

    If I remember correctly (don't have time to look) you wrote one of the most beautiful letters to your family when you left the cult. You showed love. They showed their ass. You can walk away the better person. Unlike the poster above I will do nothing further for the monsters that brought me into a cult and then controlled me and cost me so much of my life, no matter their intent. If my family comes out I'll be there and all will be forgiven. As long as they are shunning me they get nothing from me. I got sucked back in one time when my dad died and ultimately that experience was traumatic in it's own way. They don't get to pull me in and out or to have anything from me going forward as that's just more control from them. I want the best for them but the best is leaving the cult and then we can talk in freedom. I won't be shackled to their toxicity again.

    You're a good person. I'm sorry this happened to you. ((hugs))

  • Ding

    Very, very sorry...

  • stuckinarut2

    Sending you much love ❤️

  • under the radar
    under the radar

    It must have been gut wrenching to find this note, especially when you intended to leave a peace offering of your own. I am so sorry you have to deal with this. I admire your strength and resolve to just carry on the best you can. I know I would be devastated...

  • StephaneLaliberte
    Dubstepped: Unlike the poster above I will do nothing further for the monsters that brought me into a cult and then controlled me and cost me so much of my life, no matter their intent.

    I totally respect your position. I believe that when it comes to family, the decision is very much a personal one and may take into consideration a bulk of factors that go beyond religion itself.

    In my personal situation, when I look back, My mom spent countless nights sleeping next to my hospital bed when I was a kid. In order to pay for the medical bills, my dad held three jobs for several years. My parents protected me from a pedophile in the congregation. Though we didn't have much money, we never lacked food and clothing. Looking back, I just don't know how my dad did it! And finally, they passed on values on to me, one of which was : "self-confidence" and thinking outside the box. These values made me the man I am today and even allowed me to break free from the JWs! So, there is no way I could ever forget about all this, even if they became bat-shit crazy.

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