Just a really messed up situation

by My Name is of No Consequence 25 Replies latest jw experiences

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  My Name is of No Consequence

  Thank you all for your comments and suggestions. I have good news. Yesterday, I came home from work and asked him to come with me for a talk. His mother gave little resistance. We went to get some refreshments and had an very enjoyable discussion. He told me that he will get baptized when (and if) he is ready and that no one will pressure him. He understands that to survive in this world you almost have to go to college. He said that that will be his focus. He also acknowledged that there have been many changes in the last few years with the org. (Wow! He is only in his teens and understands that!)

  All of this was relief to hear. He is a bright, charismatic boy and I don't want those qualities to go to waste. I don't want him to EVER get baptized. I reminded him that he is my only child and that I love him. I want the best for him and I do not want him to make the mistakes that I did. I can't stop him from getting baptized if that's what he wants to do at some point. But, for now, it seems that he has other priorities.
  
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  jambon1

  Leave her.
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  Witness My Fury

  That's good news, but (yes here it comes) he can change his mind or just be telling you what you want to hear.

  I had these sort of fears and conversations with my niece who I had an excellent relationship with as we are very similar, I had to be careful and not too direct in not wanting her to get baptised due to the rest of my family and i was trying to keep a low profile in my fade at the time.

  When she was 17 I discussed baptism with her and she told me that that decision was years away. I was so relieved and very happy.

  6 months later she was baptised and planning on regular pioneering and going to bethel. i was devastated.

  She is now a 20 year old regular pioneer and i have next to no contact with her at all.
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  Heartsafire

  So glad to hear you had a good talk. Sounds like he has a great head on his shoulders, and thank goodness he has someone like you to support him along the way. Keep doing what you are doing, and encourage the education too. Made my day to read this.
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  under the radar

  If your wife wants to play by JW rules, and if you want to stay in the marriage, you might consider trying this:

  Remind your wife that you are the "head of the house," and that as such, you simply forbid your child to get baptized before he is of legal age. It is far too serious a commitment for a child to make. Don't forget, the Society says it's "the most important promise you'll ever make in your life."

  Further, as her husband, your wife owes you certain "marital dues." Since you are willing to continue living with her, she is duty- and Scripture-bound to return to the marital bed and open up the cookie jar. Her precious Bible says married couples are not to be depriving each other of the conjugal goodies. If she refuses to comply, she is willfully disobeying God's Word and giving a "bad witness." This completely undoes all the good she thinks she's doing with her piety and preaching.
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  OnTheWayOut

  Thanks for the update. Hope all goes well with the boy (and with you).