The new personality
Personally im a lot more outgoing, friendly and engaging. I can see now all those times i got in trouble with elders and parents and peers because of some non-JW behavior or thinking was little parts of my real self trying to burst free. Not that i was doing anything bad, nothing serious, just having posters on my bedroom wall, being a fan or Nirvana, reading other "holy books", having a gay friend.
Since leaving i feel like im 19yo again. Im discovering the world around me and im fascinated and excited about many things non JW's take for granted. Christmas still doesn't appeal to me, i dont think its wrong or anything i just dont see the fuss about it. Birthdays are nice though.
So my personality is finally free to blossom and im loving it. I treat every day as a wonderful day to be alive and my Sunday mornings/Thursday evening are particularly more enjoyable!
Never had this in all my 31 years as a JW!
Longgone/posters do you think their is a big difference /outcomes between born ins and converts ?
OK ,I think I need to set a standard here ,born ins up till the mid 20`s say
and converts who have been active for at least 20 years
Would that give us a fair equlizer ?
Maybe this could not be done here but I think it would be a good comparisonall the same.
I definitely 'stripped off the old personality'--the one I developed as a life long jw. Got rid of the superior attitude, the judgmental viewpoints, the 'holier than thou' attitude. I stopped drinking the wt cool-aid, stopped smoking the wt smoke screen, and stopped my drug addiction to the crack (pot), 'feel good' wt drug of everlasting life in a Paradise earth with my very own pet panda and lion.
I put on the 'new personality' of being the person I was born to be. No more FOG to interfere with living a good life. I'm a kinder, gentler, and more genuine human. I'm a better husband, because I now have time for my wife. No more fu*king busy work of always preparing meeting parts, assembly parts, public talks, elders meetings, sheep herding calls, kh cleaning, CO week crap,circuit assembly days, district conventions, field service, family study. Whew! I'm also , a better father and grandfather, for all the afore mentioned reasons.
Yes the 'new personality' that I have put on truly is the 'best way of life'.
I was going to write almost word for word what eyeuse2badub wrote above !
I believe I have expunged all traces of DubThink too, the particular prejudices and fears they have. I no longer have them. I had to do this by consciously stopping myself from thinking the JDub twisted way.
One of the last things was I would not eat Black Pudding, although I donate blood and would have a blood transfusion should the need arise.
So I tried Black Pudding, and the similar White Pudding, and decided I did not actually like either, but would refuse on no other basis than taste now.
I think I am a much nicer person now in so many ways than when I was a JW, a lot of this springs from now being stronger, forming my own opinions and expressing them without fear.
I have put on the New Personality, by genuine, worldly self.
Shortly after being disfellowshiped and subsequently homeless at a young age i was saved by everything i was taught to hate.
A man in his 20s, smoked,drank, smoked weed,swore, road a harley... took me in. He showed me kindness i never thought possible. Especially from such a worldly man ;)
It taught me i can be who ever i wish and still be kind.
The new personality is a corporate scam to tow the sheep in line. My wife is perplexed that I have changed, I say I'm returning to my true self without cult undertones. She says I wouldn't of married you if I knew what you were really like and I say JWs wouldn't of accepted me if I was my true self.
When I was first "studying" I heard the term putting on the new personality and stripping off the old. I was led to believe it meant to rid yourself of bad habits (smoking, etc.), dress properly and modestly and also curtail bad attitudes like being argumentative and so on.
What I later came to see is that it meant a whole lot more. Witnesses are like the proverbial frog in the pot. Over time their sensibilities are eroded and they tolerate things normal people would never tolerate such as allowing people to overstep their boundaries. Even their God-given instinct of self-preservation is eroded. They get like zombies and it is in direct proportion to how immersed they are. I worked full time so my instincts were sharper and I never bought the BS of everybody being in your business.
When a person "fades" from the Witness religion and they get their sensibilities back over time, they realize just how much of themselves they have suppressed or lost while being active in the religion.
The whole thing is very unnatural and sick.
george orwell described this new personality as well, indoctrinated and scared
When I think about the little girl I was pre-cult, I realize I have become an adult version of her now. :)