“Even if this wasn’t the Truth, I need the structure.”

by Londo111 35 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Londo111

    I remember many years back a fellow ministerial servant saying this to me. He felt that even if Jehovah’s Witnesses were not the only true religion, the regimented routine of meetings and field service and the strict rules and enforcement provided a beneficial structure for his life.

    At the time I thought if this wasn’t “the truth”, I’d have no need for all unnecessary rules and structure.

    And now that I am mentally and physically out (almost four years faded), I’ve found I still don’t need it. I don’t get drunk. I don’t smoke. I don’t use drugs of any sort. I’ve no need or addiction for porn. I’ve a girlfriend that I am faithful to and plan to marry someday. I’ve gotten my eating under control. In October 2014, I was about 310 pounds. Today I am 190 pounds.

    I’ve been employed in the same place for six years and a home and reasonable health. And yes, these things might change overnight as there are NO guarantees no matter how structured a person is, or what their religion or philosophy is.

    Rather than my life spinning out of control, I am happier, more at peace. Within my own life structure, I am more self-controlled. I’m more relaxed and open-minded. I’m not perfect, of course, but I'm more moral and trustworthy than at any point in my life.

    Some of this might be due to maturity, but I find the more I leave Jehovah’s Witnesses behind, the better my life. At the very least, I do not need the Watchtower structure to keep my life from falling apart.

    Anyone hanging onto something they know or suspect is not the truth, merely for the “structure”, I recommend rethinking this fear.

  • DJS

    Ditto Londo,

    People who need someone telling them what to do, what to think and how to behave are pathetic weaklings better suited for the ash heap of our species ' DNA history.

    Karl Marx was thinking about them when he made his opiate and religion remarks.

    Now I have to go projectile vomit.

  • Bonsai
    This is why it is important for parents to provide structure and stability for their children. Doing so makes it less likely that children will become victims to cultish, fundamentalist religious groups.
  • aboveusonlysky

    1 cor 15 'But if Christ has not been raised up, our preaching is certainly in vain, and your faith is also in vain.......we are to be pitied more than anyone.'

    One thing the bible got right, no matter what structure the org seemingly provides, all the ministry/meetings/study are ultimately a big waste of time.

  • zeb
    If he needed all that structure he also needed a back bone.
  • stillin

    I felt that being in this structured religion had kept me out of prison. I lived an honest, moral life while I was "in."

    Now I know that virtue really is its' own reward. It just feels good to treat people right.

    Whether I would have figured that out without the religion...I don't know.

  • rebel8

    I have been in management for many years. It is true some people need to be told what to do. I am not saying that disparagingly--it is something they would say about themselves.

    For your structure-seeking MS, perhaps he should join the military instead of recruiting innocents into a destructive cult just so he can keep his membership card. That is inexcusable.

  • LisaRose

    Imagine that, people can have a great life without an oppressive religion telling them what to think do and say. Good for you!

    I think when people say things like that what is really going on is that they are really just afraid of change and are afraid to examine things too much because they would actually have to make uncomfortable decisions. If you can discipline yourself to attend all the meetings, go in field service, give up holidaays, etc., you could do anything else you put your mind to.

  • FayeDunaway

    Great thread, Londo!

    I remember standing in the kitchen with my husband when I told him (we had talked about it before) that I definitely wanted to leave the religion. He was in despair. He thought our little world would fall apart, he thought our kids wouldn't grow up right, and who KNEW what was going to happen. He was only partially a believer at that point in the doctrine but he was scared.

    Well the only thing that changed regarding 'our little world' is that now my husband pursues hobbies instead of getting a suit on and struggling for hours with kids at meetings. He's in a bad mood about one tenth as often as he used to be. And the kids are awesome, pursuing their own interests and education with no interest in drinking or drugs etc. They are really passionate about social causes tho.

  • Tenacious

    A. He lacks the will to do the right thing needs prodding

    B. He needs someone to be poking him making sure he does right

    C. He lacks balls to live life by God's standards independent of anyone

    I'm leaning towards C.

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