Your post is excellent. However, you mention that you sold your house and moved.
Did you actually sell your house to get away from the Witnesses, or was it the usual reason people move: wanting a bigger house, better area, etc.?... I find it outrageous that people would sell a house just to get away from JWs, but I guess that underscores just how BAD this religion can be.
I am a fifteen year "fader" but I am a single woman who worked full-time so I guess they didn't chase after me the way they'd chase a much-needed brother since there aren't enough men in the religion... Besides, these users didn't get the time of day from me when I saw how negatively they viewed me since I worked full-time. So, I suppose I'm viewed as no loss to them. The feeling is mutual.
I agree with you, though, that a "fader" always has to watch themselves and their behavior in the community as you have mentioned.... otherwise they run the risk of finally being announced as disfellowshipped. Although, since so much time has passed and I have no family there (thankfully) and only two active friends I don't see all that often, this does not frighten me if it were to happen.
Like you, I am FREE of them and do not care what they think of me (I doubt I'm thought of at all). I no longer have that famous sword hanging over MY head either!!!