How many of you know you want children or knew you wanted children before ?

by sandy 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • Prisca
    Prisca

    Ravyn,

    If I saw having a child to give me a hope to live, as the only reason for having a child, then I probably would have let myself fallen pregnant many years ago. However, I'm aware that there is much responsibility in bringing a life into this world, and so I have refrained from doing so, until I am in a position to give that child a stable home with loving parents.

    I just know that if I had a child, that would stop me from musing on doing away with myself during my darkness. I've grown up without a mother, and I couldn't do that to my own child if I could possibly prevent that. Having a child would give me a reason to live, whereas when you have no dependants, you can get to the point where you think, "who cares if I go? No one will really miss me. It doesn't matter if I live or die."

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    My friends took their 3 year old on a holiday trip this past weekend. As they arrived at their destination very late, around 2am, the husband had to slam on the brakes to avoid another car. Riding in her car-seat Hannah, their mischeviously beautiful little 3 year old, woke partially, and with a sigh said, "goddammit...*pause*... goddammit..... Hi ho the dairy O..... goddammit" and went back to sleep.

    Hannah makes me wanna have another.

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    Six, the other day, Teryn screamed, "Goddammit!!!!" Then came a-running. I asked what happened, she said in her 2 year old voice, "I spilled my soda." And she was showing me her dress all soaking....... It was all I could do to stop laughing.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    LOL! You potty mouth

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    Prisca, I know what you meant.......... I felt that way, too. I didn't have Teryn because of that, but now that I have her, even in the event of my death, I know that my planning for her future will be meaningful. I have so much joy from her, so much meaning to my life, so much to look forward to each day and a longing to protect her. She gives me purpose. At 2, she told me if I let her use my pink felt pen I would be her best friend!! LOL. When we drove to daycare, I asked her "Who's your best friend?" She said, "My Mommy." Prisca, have a baby and love that baby. (You know me as kats...... and what I have had to deal with, in part, this beautiful girl, (and I always wanted a girl) has been worth all the trouble that "focus" has given me)!!!!!

  • bluesapphire
    bluesapphire

    I never knew there were so many people in the world that really don't like children.

    I had three little girls when I married Chris. He always told me he didn't want any of his own. He just wanted to help raise the girls. We had an "accident" last year and when I found out I cried and cried. My husband got pissed off and locked himself in our room for a couple of days. The pregnancy was hard. Eventually I got used to the idea and became happy but it was rough for a while. I now have a six month old beautiful baby boy.

    I know exactly what Prisca means because the times I have been in the depths of depression the only thing that kept me alive was knowing I had to live for my girls. Actually, the thought that they would have to be raised by my ex-husband ... I could never forgive myself. And not only alive -- but it made me want to get WELL too.

    In all honestly, I can't imagine my life without my kids. If we go on vacation we both miss the kids. We wonder what they would be doing if they were there, etc.

    Now I ask my husband how he could never have wanted kids and he says, "I wish I knew then what I know now!" We are in love with our son. He was the best accident that could ever have happened.

    I guess if two people are happy and fulfilled without kids, then I don't think they should have them. But for me, life isn't worth living without them.

  • breal
    breal

    From a very young age I wanted to have children and be a mom. I think it would be amazing to experience everything that is part of having a child. Also growing up in a very disfunctional family it has been important to me that I have a family of my own one day. To me having a child would complete me.

  • dottie
    dottie
    Sometimes it's not whether or not you want kids, but who you want to have them with that's the issue.

    Agreed silverleaf!!

    Before I was with my ex I wanted kids, we were together for almost 8 years and throughout the whole ordeal, I didn't want kids. Now I am with someone who I love dearly, I'm happy for the first time in my life and we both have the same life goals. Now once again I do want kids, as does he and we know that kids are in our future someday

  • unique1
    unique1
    Maybe I do have the maternal instinct but I am just afraid of the commitment.

    You hit the nail on the head. I feel the same way. I mother EVERYTHING. I know I would like to be called mommy, but just don't know if I am ready for the long haul yet. I am 26 and my husband is 32, so I guess I have about 4 more years to decide.

  • sunshineToo
    sunshineToo

    Thank you, Mrs. Q!

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