I was 'irregular' for a while for genuine issues, sickness,young baby at home etc... this is when I was upset and doubting
Then when I woke up properly I went cold turkey, last meeting over 3 months ago. No problems from the elders.
I had one visit from the CO but I came accross as confused and doubting, with family problems, so as not to ring any 'apostate' alarm bells, since then nothing. My JW husband knows how I feel but we agree to disagree (most of the time).
Like others said, if you don't have parents/close relatives in the org. - just walk away...the GB just confirmed in writing to the ARC that you are free to leave with no repurcussions. If anyone comes after me or my daughter I plan to use that document.
My wife and I went cold Turkey. I fully recommend it. It's been 16 months and we've had barely any bother. One Elder (our group overseer) that did call around a couple months later after my mum spoke with him when she found out we were no longer going to attend. He simply wanted to confirm the rumor for himself. I said i had no problem with anyone and my absence had nothing to do with anyone at the hall. I also made it clear I had no intention of discussing my issues with anyone. He said 'fair enough' and that's the last we've seen of him.
I also recently went for a pint with a friend from my old hall whose a couple years older than me and was made up to Elder status shortly before we stopped going. I made it clear beforehand that I was happy to go for a drink but would not go into anything.
I'm a firm believer that you've got to draw a line in the sand and keep full control of every situation that arises.
I guess it depends on how the B.O.E reacts to such things, and it only takes a keen Stasi/Nazi type Elder, just one, to get on your case and you will face the bloody Spanish Inquisition.
Most Elders are lazy and incompetent and/or hate doing Shepherding work, so usually many Faders get away for a good while with even a cold turkey approach, as above, but you never know.
We were lucky, I had asked an Elder to prove to me the 1914 Doctrine so that I could resume F.S and teach it with a good conscience, after a year of his no-show we left, no explanation or fanfare.
I honestly believe we would have just dropped off the radar if big-mouth Phizzy hadn't presented a M.S who dropped by socially with a list of questions, he then blabbed to the Elders.
I fobbed the two Elders off when they visited as a result, so now we are faded, not DFor DA.
My advice to anybody would be to fade a bit slowly, if you can face it, but realise that at some point you are going to have to have a show down of some sort in all probability. Be prepared to handle that event so as to achieve the outcome you want. I did not want to be expelled, and achieved that.
A lot of Eldubs groups are a lazy bunch.
I wouldn't worry too much about them. But keep this point in mind. Try to keep aware of when the CO visit is. Quite likely he is rogue at arranging drop in visits during is week at your KH.
As mentioned, keep your radios, stereos turned down. Get rid of your answering machine, screen all phone calls and when the door bell rings look out your peep hole. Schedule all yard work during meeting times, NEVER, EVER on Saturdays especially between 10AM and about 1PM.
Just play extremely low profile the weeks leading up to during and just after the CO visit.
And repeat!!! LOL. Good luck.