COCO- You bring out some great points in which I am trying to get people who are EX-JW's to think about constantly. Especially this statement - " I realize our former endeavor to develop the much touted Christian personality might have resulted in only a veneer . " Exactly, bingo, you nailed it.
The huge problem I noticed in the WT organization was that it totally changed from when I was a boy growing up in it in the 1960's when there would actually be WT studies dealing with the fruitages of the spirit - love, kindness, mildness, etc. to a staunch unyielding, uncaring, corporation in the 1980's where the mantra was as Ted Jaracz put it - " the needs of the organization are bigger than any single needs of individual brothers or sisters . "
So what that CAUSED in attitudes of JW's was that to develop what the WT Society claimed were " Christian " personalities - it meant being loyal in performing WT functions or activities. To " develop " a " Christian " personality now meant in the 1980's to answer at all meetings, give your Ministry school assignments, get 10 hours or more in field service, turn your time in at the end of the month- and a person would be considered " spiritual " or " developing Christian personality " . It didn't matter if the person was unkind, not mild, had no self control, or even occasionally beat his wife in private or molested JW kids- as long as that person PERFORMED WT functions outwardly then that person was " developing Christian personality " in the eyes of WT leaders.
So being a JW became more of an outward appearance thing to others than really any inward changes of putting on the fruitage of the spirit. And I think THAT observing that fact is one of the things that eventually made me leave the organization. Realizing I was running around and socializing with a bunch of fake people selling their souls to the WT Society , a corporation, but not really seriously changing inside as a person.
To SLIMBOYFAT'S credit, oh sure there were some , maybe a good number who WERE sincere, but by the time I exited for good in 2003 , there were far more JW's who bought into the concept that being " spiritual " meant being loyal to the WT Society at any cost , even if the WT Society did criminal actions. And being " spiritual " had nothing to do with being " good " , or being mild, kind, or loving- just obedient to the WT leaders. Just my 2 cents here. Take care buddy, Peace out, Mr. Flipper