My DF'd Niece Wasn't Reinstated Because She Talked To Me, My Daughter& Mom

by minimus 38 Replies latest jw friends

  • minimus
    minimus

    She met last night with her elders. She wasn't reinstated again. (It's been a few yrs). Sadly, she gave her mother a letter at a meeting 7 months ago expressing that she found someone that she thought she might be in love with. Her mother put into her pocketbook but realized when she got home that the letter must have fallen out. (She never did get the letter addressed to her). When the elders met with my niece 8 months ago, they asked if she had any "serious relationships" going on. She answered that she didn't. 8 months ago, she had just met this man that she really didn't know all that well. After a short period of time (a month or a little more), she began to tell her mother that she felt this was going to be the guy for her and that she wanted to get serious with him, for the view of marriage. To make a long story short, last month, she married this man. The elders held on, in the meantime, to this "lost" letter of hers. They confronted her with her statement of 8 months ago vs. the letter's comments to her mother. They said they felt that she was dishonest. She explained the month difference but they were not swayed. Then they said that they "got a report" that my daughter and I were seen talking and fraternizing with her many months ago at a restuarant/bar. They mentioned this 3 times. Their conclusion was that since she still had contact with her mother, uncle and cousin, they could not reinstate her. They told her that they would re-convene next week to give her their official decision.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    You know that one word that Englishman really hates? Well after reading this I really feel the need to drop it here. So to those slimy, mean spirited little men:

    *#@% YOU!!!!

    I'm sorry to hear this Minimus. Is this man she married a Witness? I hope not. It's easy to say she should chuck it all, but those hooks they implanted are hard to get rid of. Bless her heart, I wish her the best of luck.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    There ya go; Elders.

  • shamus
    shamus

    THOSE STUPID F*(*** PHARISEES!

    HOW DARE THEY BLAST HER WITH HEAR-SAY ABOUT SEEING HER WITH YOU.

    PHARISEES!

  • cruzanheart
    cruzanheart

    Minimus, all I can say is that she was in very good company (with you, that is!). I hope this is not causing her a lot of heartache, as it did my dad. Sadistic bastards they are.

    Nina

  • minimus
    minimus

    My niece married a "worldly" guy. He's very good to her. She has emotional problems, is bi-polar, suicidal and under strict psychiatric care. My brother and wife are also now seeing a therapist because they can't seem to grasp what the "truth" is doing to them......It is very, very sad.

  • shamus
    shamus

    It surely crushed her, then, minimus. It surely did. They are probably laughing about it right now, those pharisitic bastards. Could you imagine the poor wifes of those guys, and what they have to put up with? Holy crap!

  • rocketman
    rocketman

    Pharisees indeed.

  • blondie
    blondie

    Ooh, the elders hate it when you marry a "wordly" man. It is a direct disregarding of "their" authority. I know a sister that said she would not marry the worldly man she was dating so the elders would not DF her. After they had made their final decision not to DF her, she married him. They were so mad!

    I have to admit some elders try to extend mercy, but do they do when the other 2 are bent on being as mean as possible? That is why my husband could no longer be an elder and play that game.

    I hope, minimus, that you and your family can help her see that she doesn't need the approval of the elders to get God's forgiveness and love.

    James 2:13

    13

    For the one that does not practice mercy will have [his] judgment without mercy. Mercy exults triumphantly over judgment.
  • minimus
    minimus

    Blondie, I would prefer that my brother and his wife understand the craziness of it all.

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