Am I unwelcome here?

by Esmeralda 71 Replies latest jw friends

  • Esmeralda
    Esmeralda

    Hi All,

    I've been sitting here a little while lurking about and reading posts...and
    forcing myself not to post to several threads that I know would get me
    into trouble.

    I have a comment that I have to make though, and I hope that
    I won't hurt anyone's feelings.

    Has anyone noticed how many references have been made to the days
    when this board was a 'smaller community' of people who 'quickly became
    friends' and that the mood has changed since 'all the new people came?'

    I am one of those people who was new to this board and was looking for
    somewhere to post my thoughts after things got ugly at H2O.

    I began posting there only occaisionally and mostly here, where people seemed
    welcoming and kind.

    Now I see the same situations evolving here that happened on H2O:
    I hear talk of all these arguements going on and all these ill feelings going
    around and I shake my head because most of the time I have no idea what
    is going on. I must be missing the threads where these events are happening.

    I am reluctant to post here, or on H2O anymore because no matter what
    some of us do now, it seems trouble follows.

    I have met several really great people here since I started posting but I have
    to tell you that when I read comments about how great things were
    here before the influx of new people...well I feel about as welcome as
    a disfellowshipped person at the Sunday meeting.

    I don't mean to start trouble with this thread. I don't even want anyone to
    reply to it because I don't want to cause any more disruption than has
    already occurred here. It's just something to think about.

    I don't want to see this board become what H2O has, what H2O is fighting
    to overcome. I'd rather see less people posting and more helpful
    info being put out there instead of more and more people, posts, and
    insults. If it's a matter of two many folks talking here for people's liking,
    I'm willing to step off.

    It may be time for me to, in the words of my hero Dr. Phil, "Enjoy
    a good shut up." and let the old-timers of this board have the floor back.

    Just something I'm considering...

    Love ya all
    Essie

  • larc
    larc

    Essie,

    I think you are over reacting. We have a few flare ups from time to time, but people calm down and are even known to apologize. I don't think we really have a problem here at all. Many people disagree, but very few are disagreeable. I don't see any reason for anyone here lately to leave.

  • Esmeralda
    Esmeralda
    I think you are over reacting.

    That very well may be, larc. I just feel that if so many
    people are saying things were better before, that they
    may be happier if it were that way again.

    Probably one of those things that only makes sense in my own
    twisted little mind.

    happy sunday to ya
    es

  • stephenw20
    stephenw20

    Essie,

    I hope you dont quiet yourself.......

    there are many opinions........ many views.....and yours might be the one to bring another person off the fence.........

    for those who choose to spend the time here bickering and getting personal..it is just an evidence of who they are.........
    at this time in their life.......

    hope to see more posts from you!

    *S*

  • neyank
    neyank

    Hi Essie,
    I second what larc said.
    That's the fun of having a discussion board.
    No two people are going to agree on everything all the time.
    It makes things interesting.

    Besides, I would hate to see you go.
    I've enjoyed reading your posts.

    neyank

  • waiting
    waiting

    Well Es, ain't nobody older than old time me. Emperor speaking, that is.

    Has anyone noticed how many references have been made to the days when this board was a 'smaller community' of people who 'quickly became friends' and that the mood has changed since 'all the new people came?'

    Ever "discover" a neat little coffee shop or restaurant that very few seem to know about yet? Get your coffee any time of the day, talk with the locals about the Big City, your garden, your church - whatever. Everybody turns around to look at the new guy walking in the door for the first time? Sound familiar? That was us. We weren't a secret - nobody often came here, that's all.

    In general, we didn't size new people up to test if they were trolls or if we were dealing with urban legends. Time has a way of telling - and by then we had gotten to know the poster - and their intent became more obvious, even to persons like me.

    If it's a matter of two many folks talking here for people's liking, I'm willing to step off.

    Absolutely not! We old timers prided ourselves for extending a welcome - at least on the first post. As has been brought out before, the only thing Simon ever asked of us is to be civil to each other.

    I still think civility is worth striving for among all the posters. Our quiet little coffee shop has been discovered - but that's the way good things go - others discover it.

    So please feel welcomed.

    waiting

  • Flip
    Flip

    Essie, in the spirit of the movie, Field of Dreams; if you write it, “they” will come…and so will everyone else.

    And I’m grateful to have been allowed to arrive late with the rabble than never.

    Flip

  • RedhorseWoman
    RedhorseWoman

    Oh, Essie, don't EVER feel that you are not welcome here. I think Waiting summed it up pretty well. Those of us who have been here for awhile just got kind of cozy. There were so many new ones coming into the coffee shop all at once that it's been rather overwhelming. There have been many benefits to getting larger in that the ideas are more diverse. One disadvantage is that there is now SO much activity that it's almost impossible to keep track of things. One additional disadvantage is that, as Waiting said, there are now more trolls and troublemakers. We'll adjust.

  • Esmeralda
    Esmeralda

    I should have called this 'are we unwelcome' because I'm not only speaking
    about myself here, but others who have come here around the same time. I
    can't believe that I'm the only one who has had this feeling.

    Thanks everyone for trying to make me feel better. But somehow
    the idea of discovering someone else's favorite little spot and making
    it less pleasant is exactly what I feel uncomfortable about. That's what
    it feels like I'm doing here and that is what I don't want.

    I've learned a lot here and on H2O.
    I'm happy to keep looking for a spot where I won't disturb the locals.
    I'm sure I'll find it! :)

    Be well and happy everyone!

    Esmeralda

  • StiLLinTruth
    StiLLinTruth

    Good post Ez.. I think you should leave.

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