My Cognitive Dissonance is Eating Me Alive (Intro Post)

by pometerre21 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • smiddy3
    smiddy3

    Welcome Pom ,the majority have gone through what you are now going through don`t let that get you down.It took me a couple of years before I shook off all the shackles that bound me.

    That was about 11 years ago when I first was introduced to the internet.I am indebted to those guys forever.

    At first I could not believe some of the things I was learning about the religion, continued research proved these things true.

    I hope you stay around on this forum ,I have learnt and proved more about the JW religion than I ever knew in my 33 years as a Jehovah`s Witness .

    What organization is ashamed of their early history that they need to continually re-define their early history .

    What they say now about their origins compared to what was actually printed in there publications does not gel.

  • Phoebe
    Phoebe

    pometerre21

    hi,

    Welcome!

    This wonderful forum is full of kind and compassionate people who will help you.

    I am in my mid 60s and only stopped attending meetings last May after being baptised 51 years! Discovering this forum was a life saver for me. Everyone was so kind and supportive.

    The journey out is often fraught with pain and anguish. Although I always felt something wasn't right, my world still imploded when I started discovering things about the WT like the UN, child abuse etc. The religion I had given my entire life to, had believed in 100%....how could this be happening??

    But it does get better. Once the bell has been rung you can't unring it. Be true to yourself. It won't be easy but truly, nothing compares to that feeling of being set free. I feel as if my mind was locked up in a cage, bound with fear and guilt and now the door has been flung open and I see things so clearly. It's an incredible feeling.

    Please let us know how you are doing.

  • James Jack
    James Jack

    I have been on this site for 7 years now. Although most of my family have just faded away, I am still in the Congregation," body in, mind out". Yes, it's a struggle!

  • MrRoboto
    MrRoboto

    Welcome Pom, and thank you for sharing.

    I just wanted to touch on your concern for your family if you were to leave. Many here can certainly relate, and you'll find that folks have different ways of dealing with that. Some are PIMO (physically in, mentally out), some have faded and managed to be careful enough not to get DF'd while others simply walked away. Some have disassociated themselves officially, turning in a letter to that effect and some have just let the apostate accusations run their course, recording their judicial committee for all the world to see on YouTube.

    Where you go from here is up to you but I would suggest that it's quite an unhealthy way of life to stick with it while being in full knowledge of the wickedness of the organization. Even for the sake of family, it will be stressful and tremendously weighty, dragging you down until you can loose yourself from the seven men on Kings Drive (Tuxedo Park, New York, disingenuously referred to as Warwick)

  • pometerre21
    pometerre21

    just wanted to touch on your concern for your family if you were to leave. Many here can certainly relate, and you'll find that folks have different ways of dealing with that. Some are PIMO (physically in, mentally out), some have faded and managed to be careful enough not to get DF'd while others simply walked away. Some have disassociated themselves officially, turning in a letter to that effect and some have just let the apostate accusations run their course, recording their judicial committee for all the world to see on YouTube.

    Where you go from here is up to you but I would suggest that it's quite an unhealthy way of life to stick with it while being in full knowledge of the wickedness of the organization. Even for the sake of family, it will be stressful and tremendously weighty, dragging you down until you can loose yourself from the seven men on Kings Drive (Tuxedo Park, New York, disingenuously referred to as Warwick)

    It is incredibly stressful. I can't eat or sleep anymore. I've become so disillusioned. I don't know how to do it. To fake it now that I know what I know (and I'm nowhere near being finished in research). I don't know how to live my life now. I still live at home; I'm still young (I'm in my twenties). I want to be able to be free to do normal things, and have normal friendships and relationships, but I feel sick because I know I will eventually lose my family. What if I want to get married to a non-JW? They won't be at my wedding.

    What Phoebe said is so true. Once the bell is rung, you can't unring it.

    But thank you all for your support thus far. I didn't expect an intro post to get so many replies!

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