I'm a coward.

by cappytan 37 Replies latest jw friends

  • stuckinarut2

    Everything GrreatTeacher said above!!

    excellent post!

  • LostGeneration

    Amazing advice from all of the posters above, lots of techniques to consider.

    Don't let her bully your into DAing. Its just time to hang up the phone when she crosses the line. Define the line, the second she crosses simply say nicely that you will not tolerate that kind of talk, and hang up the phone.

    What's the worst thing she will do? Stop calling? Im sure you can live with that.

  • talesin

    Hey, you are not a coward. The relationship we have with a parent is different from any other. The mother-son and father-daughter dynamic is especially powerful.

    Don't feel bad - your feelings are always valid. No guilt or shame, please!

    I couldn't add anything to the advice that is already on the thread, except my support. I'm not very good in the 'Parental Unit' Department. * grins *


  • FayeDunaway
    Cappy please don't feel down on yourself. She's your mom. It's not easy or even natural to 'sever relationships' with her. She sounds awful. Take it one day at a time. Enjoy that 90% and answer the phone less often.
  • Mary J Blige
    Mary J Blige

    Wow. Great advice from those in similar territory!

    Even more disturbing : there is a common theme.... a JW toxic mother type!! Looks like we all know them / had one!

  • Bonsai
    I can only deal with my mother in doses. She loves to try and guilt trip me every chance she gets. Don't cut her off. Just deal with her only when important family matters are involved and unavoidable. Also be careful that she isn't brainwashing your kids.
  • ignored_one

    The Raised by Narcissists sub-redddit might be worth a read.


  • Oubliette

    cappytan: My mom, on the other hand, plays the victim any time we give her any push back.

    Let her "play the victim" ... all by herself.

    Little children don't throw temper tantrums without an audience. They may sulk in their rooms by themselves, but unless they get what they want they usually come out and decide to join the human race and behave.

    Unless your mother has real, serious emotional issues, (which she very well may) she will eventually get the message and change her behavior.

    You can't control other people, nor should you try.

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