How many here were thrown outa the house @ a young age by jw parents?

by avishai 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • 95stormfront
    95stormfront
    The loving asshole elder his father who was always too busy with out of state “quick-builds” to properly take care of his kids has been removed as an elder, now he is just an ordinary asshole.

    fI've seen this type of attitude from many a "strong in the truth" male. their Johnny on the spot when it comes to taking care of WT activites and securing their position in the congregation while their family suffers in the background. Usually when they are removed they blame their family for their demise.

    but, doesn't the Soceity breed this type of behaivior with their constant "can you do more" blathering?

  • l3gi0n
    l3gi0n

    I was threatened with expulsion for a few things, Once for buying a knife. My mom wanted me out, It was a pocket knife with a big, 6 inch blade. My Step dad told her no, and that i could keep the knife. She wasn’t happy with the answer, so she took It to an Elder, He saw the knife, and got excited, and then proceeded to show her his knife collection. I loved it. It was total vindication A few years later the Elder DA’d. Must have been the knifes.

  • eisenstein
    eisenstein

    To All of (((((((((((((((((((YOU))))))))))))))))))))!!!

    These stories are heartbreaking, I can't imagine looking back on my life to have been kicked out at such an early age. Although, my life had it's own tragedies. I cannot believe that the advise given by the society was to kick a son or daughter out of the house for whatever reason. At that tender age you need your parents more than ever, you need strong role models, a support system, etc. And until you are 18 (21 in some states), you are your parents responsibility.

    My older sister was told to leave the house by our JW stepfather whom our mother had just married. She was only 17 or 18, she had a two year old daughter at the time and no where to go. She lived with her "street friends" as she called them who treated her better than her own family. My mother to this day regrets agreeing with him and wishes she would have kicked him out instead.

  • teenyuck
    teenyuck

    I was not kicked out...my sister was however.

    My sis met a worldly at a JW wedding. She ended up dating him and my mother demanded that she not. Sis being 17 and quite headstrong, told her to get FucXed. Mom got mad and demanded she leave.

    Sis did. She ended up getting DFd about 1 year later....when her baby came 6 months after the wedding, they figured out she was pregnant before marriage...yada, yada.

    The worst part: My sis was an idiot for leaving. Her husband turned out to be a drug abusing thief. She stayed with him because mom never apologized for saying that the bro-in-law was a bum. She ended up not graduating HS and to this day brings up how mom treated her. She has been totally destroyed by the guy. He brought out the worst in her. She turned into a hateful shrew.

    Both were wrong. However, my mom should never have given her an ultimatum over a guy....if mom had just said "he is wonderful, I love him, you will marry him" my sis would have backed down and found another guy. She know it would get my mother's goat to date him.

  • Eric
    Eric

    I had already caused dissention in my father's household simply by questioning the teachings I had been raised to believe starting when I was twelve or so.

    My father had a habit of enforcing his headship with corporal punishment, and I had become quite familiar with the process of standing still while his belt was unbuckled, slid out of his beltloops and the belt brought down across my hips and shoulders.

    At age fifteen, I was one of five young JW's whose names were read out infront of the congregation. As an unbaptised person (at fifteen, already an issue of contention) the worst they could do to me was notify the Congregation that I had engaged in "Conduct unbecoming a christian". The others were nailed with "public reproof" notifications and a hush had fallen over the hall. Then the announcement was made that my father had been removed as an elder and a strangled cry of anguish was heard from my mother.

    Things went downhill from there. My parents vilified me for their loss of status. My siblings couldn't talk to me. I had messed up the family.

    Then it was 1976, and I was sixteen. 1975 had come to naught. I refused to go to a Sunday meeting and sit there like some pariah. My father went for his belt.

    Unbuckled it like a hundred times before, slipped it out from his beltloops like a hundred times before. Brought his arm back with that belt in hand to strike me like a hundred times before. As it came down I met his hand with my own, gripped the belt and stopped it. I twisted my grip and tore the belt from his hand. Now I stood there with the belt in my hand.

    The memory of the look in my father's eyes at that moment still nauseates me. I think he thought I was about to beat him back. I tossed the belt to the floor, exclaimed simply, "No More!" and I turned and left out the front door.

    When I came back home there was a discussion about my rebelliousness and "the rules if you live under my roof". I wouldn't live by those rules and out from under the roof I went.

    In large part, it was a relief.

    Eric

  • hyperpen
    hyperpen

    Yeah I was thrown out at the age of 18...what did I do wrong? I was a regular pioneer and assisted the book servant while working fulltime at a regular job. My stepmother didn't like me and my father couldn't keep her in line (they are still both JW)...so he suggested best thing for me to do was leave...so I went to live in the basement of a loacl brother and sister's house and then eventually the basement of the Kingdom Hall...but thank God for what they did...they did indeed help me see the 'truth' "...by their fruits you shall know them..."

  • Prisca
    Prisca
    My stepmother didn't like me and my father couldn't keep her in line (they are still both JW)...so he suggested best thing for me to do was leave...

    Exactly the same thing happened to me. My father had remarried only 8 months earlier, and my step-monster didn't like the fact that there was another woman living in the house. Particularly since I very much resemble my mother and my step-monster had some kind of weird jealously about my mother(my mother died 7 years previously - if she was still alive, I'd probably wouldn't have moved out until I'd left "the Truth").

    Prisca - What did you do next? - Francois

    I ended up staying at my sister & bro-in-law's place for a number of months, until I could find a full-time job in order to support myself. This was during the "recession we had to have" according to the then-Australian Treasurer, Paul Keating. I'd apply for jobs, and a hundred others would apply for the same job I ended up leaving for Sydney to find a decent job.

    My father got privately reproofed for kicking me out, he lost all privleges he had. He claimed the elders were "one-sided" Not everyone in the cong knew why I left home. The elders told us not to talk about it, lest it "divided the congregation" (their words).

    And I got baptised 6 months later!

    This was 15 years ago. A couple of years ago I organised for the 4 of us (my dad, step-monster, my sister and I) to meet to try to have a reconciliation. It was the first time I'd seen my Dad in 10 years. It was his choice to cut off communication to my sister and I. When my niece was born, he never bothered to see her until she was 2 years old - and that was at a Circuit Assembly! It was a civil meeting, but a week later he started up the same c**p again and ruined whatever progress we'd made.

    Just re-reading what I've just written -

    Funny how it took an "apostate" (me) to organise a reconciliation between 3 JWs and myself. And it took 2 JWs to ruin it (my father and step-monster).

    Strange world we live in, eh?

  • nixi
    nixi

    At 17, one month after my birthday for having a relationship with a worldly boy. My parents told me, I could come back, in case I'd respect their rules, leave my boyfriend, go to meetings, be a good dub again bla bla bla HELL, NO!!! (FYI, I wasn't DFed, since I wasn't baptized)

    The parents of my (now Ex-) boyfriend helped a lot (and still do). I lived at their house for around 3 months, until we found our own place.

    Well, after moving out, I didn't talk much with my parents - only regular phone calls every 2 weeks, which were required by the youth welfare office until my 18th birthday. After that, I only called my father once - in order to inform him, that I lost my job. His reaction was "We won't give you any money". Well, thanks, that wasn't exactly what I was asking for... a simple "Wow, sorry to hear" would have been enough.

    It's been 7 years now, last year my dad called out of the blue and wanted a "normal" relationship again. Well, call me unforgiving, but I just can't forget what they did to me. Do I sound bitter? I think so...

    Nixi

  • Fire Dragon
    Fire Dragon

    Hey 95stormfront,

    I know that it is tough to live out there in the world but I don't understand the "kicked out at 25" thing. You really didn't expect for your parents to take care of you forever..did you???

    No, I had lived on my own for years. I simply had no one to care for me after my heart surgery so I let go of my apt and moved in with the folks. I couldn't work so I had little money, what money I did have was drained by my bloodsucking "parents". Even though they knew I had no income and couldn't work, they still charged me $300/month rent and I paid the light bill ($200+). I had a car note, insurance, and credit card bills to pay. I had only planned to stay until I could get back on my feet, financially and health wise, so I could get my own place again. But they drained all my savings, having no sympathy for my situation. When they kicked me out I went to stay with a friend because I couldn't afford my own place. I ended up filing for bankruptcy anyway.

    FD

  • dedalus
    dedalus

    Eric,

    Wow. The Belt. Yeah, I remember stuff like that too.

    There was one time when my father told me to take off my glasses so he could hit me in the face. This got to me, because it meant I couldn't tell myself that he had just "lost his temper" and didn't mean it, like I had before. With that simple request there was intent, which made a difference: he had the presence of mind to save himself the expense of new glasses before administering his "punishment."

    Ugh. You know the big Witness line about administering discipline in love? Once, as he dragged my by my hair across the Kingdom Hall parking lot, I yelled, "I can't believe you're doing this out of love for me." He never responded, really.

    Anyway, yeah. Fathers and religion -- not a good mix. What's the line from To Kill a Mockingbird? "Sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse than a whisky bottle in the hand of [another]."

    Substitute "Watchtower" for "Bible" and you've tailored it nicely for Witnesses.

    Dedalus

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