Gee, where do I start?
One time a woman swung open the door totally nude with a huge smile on her face. I had to take a break for a while.
There once was a sister who used to chew up bananas and then spit them out for her toddler to eat. Try explaining that at the door.
Once when I was pioneering, this guy moved in to our hall and went out every day during the week, so naturally we worked together. He told me how his favorite pastime was to (how should I put this) ..... have intercourse with the cows in the barn.