Fading is better then completely leaving...comments?

by Witness 007 43 Replies latest jw experiences

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange
    ha ha--thats ridiculous--just using people for what you can get out of them ~ Stan

    Isn't that what they do?

    Turn about is fair play.

  • Elena
    Elena

    Should help each other out regardless but the scriptures say especially those relating in the faith

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim

    Yes

    I see posts about the 1995 generation change.

    The Borg finagled its way around it in the 1995 November Awake magazines.

    From saying those who witnessed the events in 1914 in the Nov8 Awake to ""about to take place" in the November 22nd edition of the Awake.

    Seemingly underhandedly attempting to do so without anyone noticing.

    Well,,, you know what? Most of us caught that.


  • EmptyInside
    EmptyInside

    It does depend on your circumstances. I made a clean break when they merged congregations. So no one knows what congregation I attend.

    My family still talks to me. Although, close friends don't associate with me. But, that's okay ,since we really don't have much in common anymore.

    A few years ago, I had an elder text me before the Memorial . But, I texted him back that I wasn't up for a visit. I'm really not doing anything wrong that they can get me for anyway. I just can't go through the motions, if I don't believe it.

  • waytodawn
    waytodawn

    Fading can work, but it doesn't have to, due to many circumstances like family, friends who will try to involve you when they see any changes in your behaviour.
    Your have to figure it out by yourself.

    I had a pretty tough time between 2001 and 2003, where I lost myself and tried very hard to find it between the watchtowers. Nobody suspected anything - even myself - when the big change came around 2003, when I was finally able to locate my problems and do something about it, when I disassociated myself from the congegration. In this time I did stuff, everyone would warn you (went to clubs... got some friends from "the world" and many more). But it was never with the intention to fade. I tried to do my best in the congegration, without loosing my freedom and do what I like.
    But in 2003 I knew exactly what needed to be done, when I got a worldly girlfriend and I finally got someone to back me up... to support me.

    Fading might help you keeping your contacts... but it might also mean to slowly die from within without you noticing. You need to feel comfortable.

    In Germany we have a phrase:
    "Lieber ein Ende mit Schrecken, als ein Schrecken ohne Ende"...


  • Phizzy
    Phizzy

    " Better an end with horror than a horror without end " a good phrase ! And one that describes my attitude when I walked away. I did not know what would happen, but knew I could not endure being a J.W anymore.

  • ElderBerry
    ElderBerry
    .
    The Borg finagled its way around it in the 1995 November Awake magazines.
    From saying those who witnessed the events in 1914 in the Nov8 Awake to ""about to take place" in the November 22nd edition of the Awake.
    Seemingly underhandedly attempting to do so without anyone noticing.
    Well,,, you know what? Most of us caught that

    Could someone explain what happened in 1995? I don’t think I’ve heard about this but I was in the truth at this time.

  • LongHairGal
    LongHairGal

    ELDERBERRY:

    In 1995 they changed the Generation teaching. This was a major teaching. They previously believed that people living in 1914 would see the ‘End’ of the World or ‘this system of things’ as they put it.. Well, they changed their minds. They very nicely slipped their ‘new understanding’ into their magazine article very nonchalantly.

    It was at a Sunday meeting that I did not prepare for and I just learned about it as it was read.. It hit me like a bolt of lightning that they were just stringing everybody along.. I knew right then that my time in the Witness religion was over and I planned my ‘Fade’. There wasn’t much fallout from other people initially and I kept my feelings to myself. There must have been a delayed reaction though because many people left the religion over the next several years.

    Hopefully, this was a wake up call to some Witnesses that they had BETTER get themselves a decent job to prepare for their retirement. (There was a poster on the forum who was in this category. He got a good job before it was too late.) That was almost 30 years ago and would be enough time for somebody to have done something. Those JWs who paid no attention and did nothing? Oh well…

  • My Name is of No Consequence
    My Name is of No Consequence
    I began my fade around 2015. It has worked for me for the most part. But some feel that they have to sever ties completely by getting d'fed. Everyone's situation is different, so to each his own.
  • TonusOH
    TonusOH

    ElderBerry, JW Facts has a good page on the generation teaching and how it changed in 1995.

    https://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/generation.php

    Before 1995, the idea was that the generation that saw the events of 1914 would not pass before the end. By 1995, that generation was in its 80s and 90s. They practically dropped the teaching, only to revive it in a modified form in 2010 (the overlapping generations teaching), which I think has been a huge mistake for them.

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